Category Archives: Nails

Jan21

Bluebird Lacquer: Multichrome Madness Customs January 2018

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• A PRESS SAMPLE FANDANGO •

After frigid temps, 7″ inches of snow and disgusting behavior all around, the weather has finally set itself straight.  We’ve had a taste of spring all weekend long, and I’m seriously about thisclose to putting pants on I’m just so dang excited.  I mean, I won’t cuz it’s No Effort Sunday and pants are forbidden, but weather like this makes me think about it for 2.5 seconds.  Look at me, being good and virtuous and all around most boring person of all time ever, taking this Spelling Bee Champion of 1987 nerd thing to a whooooole nother level.  Cuz who’s breaking the rules like a dadgum crazy person?  NOT THIS LADY.  Does this qualify for bonus points then, cuz seriously, I’ll take a billion.

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Jan20

Color4Nails Spotlight: Laquester – Almost Fall Collection + C4N Exclusives

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Whoever’s idea it is to work at work, well I’ve got a karate chop over here with your name written allll over it.  Cuz OMG, can’t a girl ever type with her feet up on the desk like the Good Lord intended, at least for a little bit?  Apparently, NOT TODAY.  I swear, food and potty breaks and being super lounge-y:  WHERE DID YOU ALL GO?!  I took a new position back in July and I honestly didn’t quite know what the whole thing entailed.  Fast forward six months, knee deep in paperwork and forms and spreadsheets GALORE! and guess what, guys?  I do taxes!  Who knew?  And for a girl who literally uses fingers for basic adding and subtracting and for when the calculator is over there and I’m over here, wellll … I’m surprisingly good at taxes.  Quick! Someone grab my horn so I can toot it.  I’m feeling very deserving right about now.

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Jan15

The Holo Hookup: February 2018 – Love Connection

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Hubby left for work and left the TV on the sports channel. The remote control is clear across the other end of the couch, and the cat (who hates me) has decided to lay adorably across my lap and fall asleep. It is both the worst day and best day ever. If anyone wants to come over and change the channel for me, seriously, that’d be GREAT.

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Jan13

Shimmer Me Box: January 2018 – Winter Wonderland

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New stuffs on the blog today!  First time reviewing the monthly Shimmer Me Box, and I swear I feel like a fancy lady.  I’m always grateful for new opportunities, and normally I’m pretty cool about it.  You know, calm and rational and able to be out in public.  But then you go tossing a bunch of SHIMMER in the mix and I can’t even pretend anything normal is happening right about now.  I’m a noodle leg-y mess and we haven’t even started yet.  If we make it to the end of this blog, it’ll be damn near miracle.  I’m sure the Shimmer Me peeps are sooooo glad they’ve asked me to blog for them today cuz my professionalism clearly is at an all-time high.

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Jan11

Painted Polish: 2018 Duo

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• A PRESS SAMPLE FANDANGO •

Two seconds into the freezing drizzle, and can I just say:  there’s a whooooole lotta NO happening right about now.  Fetal position, tears and about 27 levels of sadness.  Excuse me while I go hibernate under the weight of a thousand electric blankets cuz winter is the lamest idea out of all the lame ideas.  Like, I’d have more success in attempting to be skinny next to an open bag of Cheetos before I’ll get through a day in January with a smile on my face.  Seriously, booooo on winter.  Plus, I don’t look good in a 67-pound sweater, sooo .. see y’all in April, then?  I think so.

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Jan8

Cupcake Polish: Food for Unicorns Trio

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There is a reason why I’m not a morning person, and today was the day that proved it.  Cuz the person that bounds out of bed first steps in the cat vom and I adamantly REFUSE to be that person.  NOPE, I shall lay in bed while you say dirty words, peeling your sock off like it contained remnants of some sort of bubonic plague from the year 1904, and then attempting to clean it all up with an unfortunately empty can of carpet spray.  Oh, a HAPPY MONDAY for sure!  Well, for me anyway.  Cuz I woke up about 15 minutes before I needed to be at work, and then somehow managed to look the freshest of all the daisies that you EVER did see.

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Jan7

Glisten & Glow: Birthday Duo + New Glorious Glistenettes

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• A PRESS SAMPLE FANDANGO •

Quick blog for you today, I guess.  Cuz hubby just got up and randomly started taking ornaments off the Christmas tree, complete with extra dramatic sighs and a skosh of the side eye, so I’m assuming that means I have a job to do and FOR SOME REASON it’s not writing a blog.  Or perhaps I just need to supervise the whole thing in case the Tree Punching Incident of 2016 rears it’s ugly head once again.  But UGH, who’s up for a rousing game of moving legs and arms and other body parts against your will?  NOT THIS LADY.  If the tree stays up until February 26 (as it has once before; clearly not my best year ever), that’s fine by me.  Sunday is for lounging and for eating things with gravy on top – there just isn’t room for much else.

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Jan4

Nail Hoot: Polish Pickup January 2018

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YOU GUYS.  We did it.  ON TIME AND EVERYTHING.  Seriously, whose blog is this cuz it’s certainly not mine.  Cuz only a superhuman can write TWELVE blogs back to back to back and somehow get them posted BEFORE all the nail polish goes away.  Soooo, on the off-chance this is my blog after all, well then who’s the Queen of the Carpal Tunnel, hmmm?  I mean, I’m not saying it’s me, butttt … it’s probably me.  Are bonus points coming?  Only about a trillion, pretttty sure.

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Jan3

Lollipop Posse Lacquer: Polish Pickup January 2018

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• A PRESS SAMPLE FANDANGO •

A quick blog for you tonight, so we’re gonna jump right in with some things.  The Polish Pickup is inching ever so close, and I am determined to get all these blogs done BEFORE the sale starts (as in, ideal scenario).  So even though I’m just tossing out pictures and not saying words, pretending like I ain’t a huge drool-y mess and this is all NO BIG DEAL, let me assure you:  it’s basically the BIGGEST big deal that you ever did see and I’ve got a thousand drool buckets here to prove it.  But since we don’t have 18 years to just hang out in here reading things today, it’s onto the polish sans-fanfare we go. Weeee!

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Jan2

Anchor & Heart Lacquer: Polish Pickup January 2018

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• A PRESS SAMPLE FANDANGO •

Cooking is not the same as riding a bicycle:  if you don’t do it often, you forget how altogether – and quite SPECTACULARLY if you want my opinion. Let’s just say – completely random example of course – you get married to a chef and pretty quickly get relegated to 1,825 days worth of dish duty cuz of the ONE TIME it took 15 years to cut an onion. And then let’s say that husband goes to work on New Year’s Eve and leaves you alone to fend for yourself (i.e., nightmare scenario) and you decide to make a casserole (with Dorito crumb topping!) cuz we like it effortless ’round here.  So far so good, except … wellll, sometimes things ensue (again, LET’S JUST SAY).

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