Tag Archives: polish pickup

Fair Maiden Polish: Polish Pickup October 2017


Oh, just sitting here with the cat at 2 in the morning eating Doritos cuz CLEARLY we know how to party. Seriously guys, first Spelling Bee Champion of 1987 and now THIS. Why I’m not married to Leonardo DiCaprio at this point defies alllll the comprehensions.

So, seeing as the Polish Pickup is practically over, I figure now’s a good time to write a blog about it. Best blogger ever, y’all! Never forget. Ugh. However, I’m gonna try to make this review short and sweet in an effort to be somewhat professional. And then spend the next 17 paragraphs discussing how I’m gonna make a review short and sweet, thereby defeating the purpose about ONE BILLION PERCENT. Again, BEST BLOGGER EVER, just so we’re clear.

Let’s move on, shall we? You know, before more stupid things come out. I have the Fair Maiden Polish contribution to the Polish Pickup to show you, and I swear y’all are about to get suuuuper unattractive in about 2.5 seconds. Cuz there’s shimmer and flakies and noodle legs GALORE! Take a look:



Welp, let’s go ahead and get the smiling like an idiot part out of the way first, then. Perhaps y’all need to go off by yourself for a second, lest someone walk in on you while you’ve got your eyes closed, looking stupid.

Once again, the theme for October is Monsters & Mythical Creatures, and Sarah and Adrienne were inspired by the movie of my childhood, The NeverEnding Story. Seriously, I wanted to be that Empress. She was beautiful and angelic and the complete opposite of 9-year-old me with a face full of eyeglasses.

Here’s the pic:


Now here’s the polish:



Basically twins! But did we expect anything less from the Fair Maiden ladies? NO WE DID NOT.

DESCRIPTION: A white crelly with intense blue shifting shimmer that hints at violet and red in certain lights; finished with purple/blue multichrome flakies and a dusting of scattered holo sparkle throughout

OPACITY: Three coats, but two was pretty good

GUYS. This is one of the prettiest polishes you’ll ever lay your eyes on. It literally just glows on the nail. An eye-catcher, a dream-come-true-er. You’re gonna need like 27 bottles, but then again, you already know.

More pics, for extra convincing:




Gah! The flakies got me, guys. They got me good.

The Polish Pickup sale is open NOW and will stay open all the way thru Monday, October 9. Cost varies between makers, but Fair Maiden’s polish retails for $11. Shipping is a flat $3 no matter how much you buy. However, I recommend all of them because no one does Crazy Nail Lady quite like you. Get on it, boo boos!

For more information on the sale and how it works, click here for the FAQs. Cuz I’ve blogged like 7,397 days in a row and the carpal tunnel is so dire.

Now click here for shopping. I mean, what else is more important for you to do today? (NOTHING, in case you’re curious.)

Later, loves!



BLUSH Lacquers: Polish Pickup October 2017


Vacation is over and everything is back to normal cuz it’s 2am on a work night and obviously it’s TIME TO WRITE A BLOG!

Now fast forward approximately 22 hours later, and the second sentence of this blog has officially been born.  Sooooo … if you’re interested in wasting a whooooooole lotta time, I got tips and pointers complete with 17 charts and graphs and maybe an Excel spreadsheet, to be safe.  Cuz you don’t get to Lazy, Level EXPERT by doing things in a timely manner.  Ugh.  Seriously, someone needs to come save me from me.

And now SUDDENLY! the Polish Pickup has already started and OMG, THE HIVES ARE LURKING! I’ve only got 2 polishes left to blog, so this is some kinda IDEAL SCENARIO if you ask me.  

In other words, let’s get the hell on with it before the things are no longer the things.  Take a look at what Victoria with BLUSH Lacquers has made for us this month:


Well, now that’s just stupid pretty, is it not?  Gah!  I’m not even gonna pretend normal things are happening over here.  Cuz someone just tossed in a bunch of shifty business and I’m basically a big ole puddle of goo.  Plus drool.  And 27 other ladylike-type scenarios.  OMG, am I still married cuz seriously I don’t even know.

As mentioned in my previous post, this month’s Polish Pickup theme is Monsters & Mythical Creatures. Victoria was inspired by a Percy Jackson version of a hippocampus. Check it out:

So then naturally, she made us something beautiful. It’s legit time to toss all composure out the freaking window, just so you know. 


DESCRIPTION: A navy based polish with a shifting orange-gold-green micro flake shimmer, shifting green-blue-purple-pink flakies and a light touch of scattered holo

OPACITY:  Two coats, three if you’re crazy; obviously, I did three

Gah! I just love how those glittery things catch the light. Distracting, to say the least. Cuz you forgot you were reading this blog, didn’t you? Cuz I forgot I was even writing it.

Seriously, this polish is nothing short of STUNNING. Victoria always makes us such pretty things, but if we must choose favorites, this one is definitely at the top.  Formula is magical perfection.  And the Ugly Ecstasy Face is a dire thing.

More proof below!

Who’s still upright?  Not a dadgum one of us, that’s who.  I know y’all have 50-ish polish and polish-related things to choose from this month, but if this beauty isn’t somehow in your shopping cart, well then CLEARLY you are wrong.

So about this Polish Pickup thing, I’ll give you a brief rundown of talking points:

WHAT:  A crap-ton of indie brands all coming together for a one-stop shop event; you buy one or all, it’s up to you! Flat $3 shipping no matter what. 

WHEN:  Right now thru all day Monday, October 9

WHERE:  http://www.PolishPickup.com

If you’d rather read the more eloquent version, click here for the FAQs from the PPU website.

The prices vary from brand to brand, but BLUSH Lacquers’ retails for $11.75.  But happiness is priceless so that point is moot.

To join in the fun of future Polish Pickup theme nominations, voting and sneak peeks, click here for the Facebook fan group. DO IT. I’m serious.

To be continued, loves! One more PPU to go!


Nail Hoot: Polish Pickup October 2017


I was 2.5 seconds away from buying my cat a unicorn horn hat souvenir but thankfully George Lopez walked down the hotel lobby and I got properly distracted by FAMOUS PEOPLE! for the next couple hours.  Hubby gave me the secret eye signal, you know, the one that says SIMMER DOWN, CRAZY without drawing attention to the fact that someone is clearly not simmering down.  Seriously though, hubby just needs to look away from time to time cuz when someone famous is nearby, I am the best dadgum lurker that EVER freaking lurked.  But FOR SOME REASON, that’s not a very attractive quality.  Ugh.  Hubby is ZERO fun sometimes.  Good thing I’m such a Trophy Wife or we’d all be worried.

So while I sit here behaving all sorts of stalker-y, let’s get to the point. The October Polish Pickup is just around the corner, and I know y’all just dying to get out your grabby fingers. There’s about 50-ish brands participating this month with some pretty amazing polish and polish-related things, so if there was ever a time to get off your no-buys, right now would be it. It’s a bye bye checkbook type situation for you, in case you didn’t know.

Here’s the gorgeous contribution from Brandie with Nail Hoot:


Drool-y Scenario #6534589, and we all got our buckets on standby.  It’s about to get suuuuuper unattactive in here, I can already tell.

The theme for the month of October is Monsters & Mythical Creatures, and Brandie chose this awesome picture as her inspiration.  Take a look at this:

Now look at this:


Basically, NAILED IT isn’t even close.  A whoooooole lotta jaw dropping, though?  Welllll, that’s better.

DESCRIPTION: A stunning, dark golden linear holo with medium red flash throughout

OPACITY:  Two luscious coats plus glossy top coat

This color is so comfy cozy brown-y gold, but those glittery bits?  UGH. I gots the noodle legs y’all and the Ugly Ecstasy Face is in full effect. I’m a walking pile of sex, just so you know.

More shots, but not for licking:

Even though you want to! But the judgy eyes, they are everywhere.

So in case you are new, this is how this thing works. The Polish Pickup shop goes live on Friday, October 6 at 11am EST. At approximately 11am and 1 second, you’re tossing nail polish in your shopping cart like a dadgum crazy person. Plus 27 backup bottles for SAFETY. Then get back into pajamas cuz you’ve had a hard day.

In case you’re unable to prioritize properly, the shop will stay open until Monday, October 9 at 11:59pm EST. After that, every last one of these polishes: GONE. Forever. As in POLISH EMERGENCY! so be sure to get your life in order or else it’s a sad state of affairs for you.

Prices for the polishes are all different; Skyward Gryphon in particular will retail at $9.75.  Shipping is a flat rate of $3 no matter if you buy one polish or if you buy all of them. I don’t do the maths too well, but I’m thinking that’s a pretty good deal.  Also, you can make multiple orders over the course of the weekend, and the lovely PPU ladies will combine your shipping.  Who’s royalty then? That be YOU.

To get in on sneak peeks and future voting for monthly themes, click here to the join the Polish Pickup Facebook group. Then when October 6 rolls around, click here for shopping! DO EEEEEET. I mean it.

More PPUs are coming, so be sure to stick around.  Later, loves!


Rise and Shine Nail Lacquer: Polish Pickup September 2017


GUYS.  We’ve made it.  Not super on-time by any means, but that is beside the point. Hubby took me out of town for a belated birthday weekend, (which involved a lot of walking, by the way – DO YOU NOT KNOW ME AT ALL?!) and he sorta kinda basically RUINED all my blogging plans. So rude.

However, we are sitting here at brunch and I’m ignoring him like such a good wife and blogging like a DADGUM PROFESSIONAL.  OMG, am I still married? Cuz seriously, I don’t even know.

So while we wait for GRAVY! let’s talk about the final Polish Pickup shade. Listen y’all. This is IT. One of the most beautiful shades in the PPU this month. Even if you’ve already placed your order – if this one somehow didn’t make it in the cart, first of all, I am var var concerned about your brain, but second of all, GO BACK. Get this. PPU will combine shipping for you, so even if you had an excuse, it is officially and effectively NULL AND VOID. 

That might’ve been a mess of a paragraph, but now is not the time to grammar. Take a look at Skykine Drive by Rise and Shine Nail Lacquer:


Told ya. Are angels singing? I hear angels.

This polish makes me close my eyes and smile to myself like an idiot. Y’all, my soul is soothed. Do you see why you need this?!  It’s calming and peaceful and joyful and looooove. ORRRRR!  You can just get it so I’m not the only one in here looking stooopid. 

Here is Sarah’s inspiration photo:

Now drool with me!


DESCRIPTION:  A robin’s egg blue with gold, red, purple, and green holo flakies and a copper and gold shimmer

OPACITY: Two coats, but easily could’ve gone Polish Mountain with it. However, I gave up after two cuz I am not very good at goals. 

As if you need more convincing, but just in case:

And now wallets are flying out of purses, everywhere. 

Ok, FOCUS. The Polish Pickup sale is almost over. You have today and tomorrow only to snag this beauty, and then it goes away FOREVER. And I swear, if you’re waking up on September 5, sad and polish-less, we’re gonna need to chat about decisions and how to make them. CUZ WE’VE BEEN OVER THIS BEFORE, that’s why. 

To read up on the Polish Pickup, what it is, what it does, click here to read the FAQs. Then while you’re in a clicking mood, join the Polish Pickup group on Facebook (click here!) so you can get in on theme nominations, voting, interacting, and being social all while lounging on couches. Weeeee!

Oh, and this polish retails for $10 and comes with a side of Leonardo. Or else I just dreamed that. I dunno. 

Click here for shopping, then go be happy.

Later, loves!


Top Shelf Lacquer: Polish Pickup September 2017


Blog train still rolling!  Hope you’re ready to spend some money today, cuz there’s no way you’re getting out of here without hoarding all the polish. Seriously, I MEAN IT.  Time to get off your no-buys, ladies! Cuz a legit no joke justification scenario is in effect.  And I’m just in here chatting like we have all the time in the world. 

WE DON’T. The Polish Pickup sale is underway y’all and there’s just two days left to get your life in order.  I have one of the prettiest polishes of your life to show you today, and you’re gonna need approximately 18,000 bottles. Grab your drool buckets!  Here’s Kindred Spirits from Top Shelf Lacquer:


OMG, have you ever?  (No you have not.)  I just love Amy’s polishes so much. Everything she makes is a masterpiece. If you’ve never owned a bottle, you’ve got a serious amount of catching up to do. But totally worth it if you’ve got a billion dollars handy.

Once again, the September Polish Pickup theme is Fall Foliage and Fun. Look at this cute inspiration photo:

Well, I could end the blog right here and y’all’d know you want this polish. Cuz two little birdies in a tree being adorable? We’ve all got the Grabby Fingers, pretty sure.

But because I am a DADGUM PROFESSIONAL, here’s swatches of Amy’s beautiful polish anyway:


DESCRIPTION:  A steel blue holographic with golden shift, bronze fleck and subtle lavender flame

OPACITY:  Two dreamy coats

You guys. I am in love with everything. The holo, the shift, the FLECK!, the FLAME!  Those are drooling words right there, and trust me, I’m already an unattractive mess. Application is smooth, color is glorious, sparkle is fantastical perfection. YOU WILL LOVE in a smother-y stalker-y kinda way, I just know it. 

More drool-y opportunities:

Who’s looking sexy right now?  NOT THIS LADY! Cuz one does not look good whilst the tongue is lolling about outside the body.

Okay, now FOCUS.  Here’s all you need to know:

As mentioned before, the Polish Pickup store is officially open and will stay open until Monday September 4 at 11:59pm EST.  DO 👏🏼 NOT 👏🏼 SLEEP 👏🏼 ON 👏🏼 THIS. Cuz who wants to wake up on Tuesday, sad and polish-less? Damn near no one, that’s who.  

To shop: http://www.PolishPickup.com

Cost: All the makers set their own pricing; Top Shelf will run you $12. But happiness is priceless, and that’s all that matters. Shipping is a flat $3 fee no matter if you buy one or a billion.

Plus, if you’ve already purchased from the sale, you can go back in and buy more goodies and PPU will combine your shipping. So feel free to place like 42 orders. You’ll be taken care of like royalty. 

To be continued; only one more to go! Later, loves!


Anchor & Heart Lacquer: Polish Pickup September 2017


Seeing as the Polish Pickup is practically over, I figure now’s a good time to write three more blogs about it.  Best blogger ever, guys!  Never forget.  Ugh.

Gotta keep the chatty to like the barest minimum of life, otherwise I’ll be in here telling you things after the things are no longer the things.  And considering how often people just looooooove that, I’m assuming an effort to get the hell on with it would be the most ideal.  So let’s jump into some nail polish!  Here’s something beautiful from Anchor & Heart Lacquer:


Her name is So Cozy, and good news:  you’re buying it!

The Polish Pickup theme for September is Fall Foliage and Fun, and Taryn decided to focus on the fun part.  I fully expected to show you an inspiration picture full of pajamas and couch lounging, but surprisingly it’s just a pile of sweaters.  I mean, still FUN except with less Cheetos.

Look how tiny that photo turned out. Bahahahahaha! More proof I’m suuuuuuper good at blogging, guys!  At least something pretty happens next, otherwise we’d all be worried,


DESCRIPTION:  A dark grey crelly with scattered holo, gold and copper glitter, red/copper/gold chrome flakies, and shifting chameleon microglitter

OPACITY:  Three lovely coats

This polish literally looks like what cozy is.  The gentle grey, the fiery glitters that are like sparks of a bonfire or maybe some crushed leaves.  Y’all know I’m not the biggest fan of fall (cuz it’s too close to winter which ruins FREAKING EVERYTHING), but if I gotta pick something, anything to enjoy about it, it would be how I can take a lunch break out in the car without making a sweat bead mustache.  But this polish is a very close second.  It’s magical perfection.

In other words, you’re gonna need a billion bottles. AT MINIMUM.

Who’s still upright? Not a dadgum one of us, that’s who.

The Polish Pickup sale is open NOW and will stay open all the way thru Monday, September 4. Cost varies between makers, but Anchor & Heart’s polish will retail for $12. Shipping is a flat $3 no matter how much you buy. I recommend all of them, because no one does Crazy Nail Lady quite like you. Get on it, boo boos!

For more information on the sale and how it works, click here for the FAQs. Cuz I’ve blogged like 7,397 days in a row and the carpal tunnel is so dire.

Where to buy:  https://www.polishpickup.com

That’s it on this one.  Make sure it’s in your shopping cart! You have 2.5 seconds.  Then check back later, cuz this blogging frenzy basically just got started.

Later, loves!


Fair Maiden Polish: Polish Pickup September 2017


Okay, I’ve goofed off long enough and now we’ve reached Polish Emergency, Level EXPERT.  Cuz I’ve got four Polish Pickup polishes left to blog and zero time to blog them.  This is what happens when you spend your evening stuck inside a shirt in the JCPenney’s dressing room instead of writing a blog post like the Good Lord intended.  Gah!  I’m only a little bit stressed at the moment, and the hives are lurking to like the trillionth degree.  Sooooo, if a Starbucks is coming, that’d be great.  With whipped cream and a side of Leonardo, please.

Now FOCUS.  I figure posting this blog at some point BEFORE the Polish Pickup sale ends is the most ideal situation.  Best blogger ever?  I think YES.  Here is what Sarah and Adrienne, the ladies from Fair Maiden Polish, has for us this month:


I see shimmer!  I see glitters!  I see jaws and THEY ARE DROPPING.

I might’ve mentioned this approximately 18,000 times before, but the theme for this month is Fall Foliage and Fun.  Sarah and Adrienne were inspired by this gorgeous night sky.  Take a look at this:

Now look at this:


Well, we all knew something beautiful was going to happen.  Plus noodle legs.  And drool.  And other suuuuper ladylike-type scenarios.  

DESCRIPTION:  A slightly metallic night blue with subtle purple shift, ultra chrome flakies that shift magenta-copper-gold, holographic sparkles and chameleon glitters that shift red-gold-green

OPACITY:  Two coats, but excellent coverage in one. This one had a thicker formula than average for me, but it applied just fine and basically looks like a masterpiece.  Duh.

More proof and/or convincing?  Keep scrolling!

AND LOOK!  That subtle purple shift mentioned above?  SNAGGED IT.  

I mean, it’s not super in-yo-face or anything, but I get half a horn toot at least.  

DONE. And in the cart she goes!  Plus 27 backup bottles for safety.  Weeeee!

Fall-ing Stars will retail for $11, which is a pretty cheap deal for so much happiness. Now, here’s more deets:

Polish Pickup FAQs – click here

Polish Pickup shop – click here

Got stuck in a what in a where now? – click here

So here’s where it gets serious. The Polish Pickup officially opens today (9/1) at 11am EST and will stay open through all day Monday, September 4. So if you can’t manage to get your priorities straight in a mere three days, well it’s a sad state of affairs for you then. In other words, setting 17 alarms makes the most sense. Cuz now is not the time to be normal. 

To be continued for all of eternity. More polish coming!