Tag Archives: nails

Jul14

Fair Maiden Polish: Summer 2017 Collection 

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 A list of achievements, circa 1980s:

1.  Super good at fashion.  I mean, I had my initials on my eyeglasses cuz nothing gets more fancy than having enough room on your lenses to place a DADGUM STICKER.  Take that, add an extraordinary amount of flowered corduroys, and seriously guys:  if Vogue had called next, no one would be surprised.

2.  Super good at spelling.  Although I don’t really know where that’s gotten me in life other than being super annoying to everyone who doesn’t know the word orchestra has an “h” in it.

3.  Super good at sports.

Bahahahahahaha.  Just kidding.  Although I did get in a hair pulling fight with a friend outside of the library.

OMG, I’m the coolest person on the planet. 

4.  Super good at life.  Not only did I hopscotch on cow patties cuz no one told me they were made of poop, but I also thought condoms went on girls until like the 10th grade. I’m not even gonna pretend that’s normal.

Ugh. 

Good thing I’ve got this nail polish thing on lock! Fair Maiden Polish sent me their awesome new summer collection to review for you today, all inspired by fun songs from the 1980s. For real, if these beauties don’t bring back memories of you in your bedroom, singing into your hairbrush, well clearly you are a robot. Take a look!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Oooooh!  You’re buying ALLLLL these!

The ladies from Fair Maiden Polish, Sarah and Adrienne, are both girls from the 80s and grew up loving the songs that served as inspiration for this collection.  ME TOO!  I think the 80s is the best decade for music.  I had a huge collection of records that ranged from Oh, Mickey to Billie Jean all the way to the Beastie Boys one I wore around my ponytail but somehow did not start a new trend exploding throughout the middle school.  Although WHY?!?! is the actual question.

First up is Sunglasses at Night:

DESCRIPTION:  A dark blurple holographic with navy flame and holo sparkles

COATS:  Two

Inspired by the August 1984 song by Corey Hart and IT. IS. STUNNING.  A perfect night sky of a polish.  We lub it lots, oh yes we do.

Here’s a shot under the lamps, just in time for the Drool Convention:

Next up is Caribbean Queen:

DESCRIPTION:  An ocean blue with aqua shimmer, subtle shift to purple in certain lighting and holo sparkles

COATS:  Two

Inspired by the August 1984 song by Billy Ocean.  I want to swim in a bathtub full of this one.  So shimmery, so glowy, so super pass-out-y.  Might need your smelling salts, let’s just say.

Now here’s Cruel Summer:

DESCRIPTION:  A juicy neon melon with purple shimmer

COATS:  Three

Inspired by the June 1983 song by Bananarama.  And she’s a hot little mama!  However, the correct color on this one was so hard to capture.  It’s both an orange tone AND a pink tone depending on your lighting, and I swear I about got the hives trying to get these pictures just right.   But if you’re looking for an insane display of effort, well by all means:  SCROLL.

Outside shot shows more of its pink side:

And here’s that shy purple shimmer:

Next is Heaven is a Place on Earth:

DESCRIPTION:  A shifting gold to rose holographic with holo sparkles

COATS:  Two

Inspired by the September 1987 Belinda Carlisle song, and so now we’re all just puddles of goo at this point.  Cuz you can’t be gold and pink and shifty and shimmery, and somehow expect me to remain normal and upright. I mean, when you ask for a non-fat, no-whip Starbucks but accidentally get full-fat, does that mean it doesn’t have any calories simply because you ordered it that way? Well, OF COURSE IT DOES. But I think you see my point. In other words, I want a Starbucks.

OMG, what?  Shut up, Brain.

And now, a holo EXTRAVAGANZA!:

Mood lighting.  Phwoar!

Lastly, here’s Karma Chameleon:

DESCRIPTION:  A light violet purple to mint green thermal with strong red shimmer, holo sparkles, and red/purple/blue/green chameleon flakies

COATS:  Two

Inspired by the September 1983 song by the Culture Club.  And naturally, this polish had to be a color changer (cuz CHAMELEON) and use chameleon flakies (also cuz CHAMELEON).  In other words, NAILED IT doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.

Full view of the warm state:

Full view of the cool state:

That’s two extra efforts, in case you don’t math well.  If an award is coming, that sounds about right.

The round up:

This collection is available now, so get on it, boo boos!  Cuz if you’re getting out of this blog without all five in your basket, well, I can only imagine how WRONG you must feel. So ENTIRE Summer 2017 Collection it is then! Congratulations on your very good decision.  Some deets:

Full collection retails for $48

For single bottles (although this point is moot), Cruel Summer and Sunglasses at Night retail for $10; all others are $11

Click here for shopping!

Okay, gang, we’re done for now!  Thank you for always reading all the way to the bottom.  Internet high fives for everyone!  (Or pajamas, if you’re me.)

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul13

Stella Chroma: Multichrome Madness Group Custom Duo 

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It’s the never ending quest to get caught up, PART ONE BILLION.  Ugh.  I swear, I see the drafts queue and about 7,345 partially written blogs staring back at me, but then I’m like FULL HOUSE IS ON! and so it’s down a rabbit-hole I go.  At some point, game notifications light up and it’s time to save some baby pandas from their little bubble cocoons – and that doesn’t just happen all by itself.    Feet up on the coffee table, wearing an enormous amount of robe, with one eye sleeping because CLEARLY:  responsibilities are for other people.

But now we’re in dire straights and I gotta get my focus face on.  Cuz guys, there’s a POLISH EMERGENCY in our midst.  A legit no joke crisis-a-mundo, topped with panic and anxiety and a full tube of hives cream.  In other words, pa y at te..n

Ack!  Chips Ahoy just appeared out of nowhere.  BRB.

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Someone just needs to keep the TV off and the snacks away.  Except don’t, or I will cut you.

Multichromes are happening, y’all!  Miss Pam from Stella Chroma is in the spotlight for July, and she has created a most awesome custom duo exclusively for the members of the Multichrome Madness group on Facebook.  Who’s ready to spend some money today?  Damn near all of us, that’s who.  Lesss go!

First up is Amortentia:

This beauty is a re-release of the very first Multichrome Madness exclusive back when Stella Chroma used to be Paint Box Polish.  She’s come back to life, guys, and for that we all say THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.  Now send Leonardo, kthxbai.  

For those that don’t already have the original Amortentia, it is a glorious pink/yellow/green/gold shifty stunner.  There could be a bit of a blue shift at super extreme angles, but that sounds like hand gymnastics to the trillionth degree, aka EXERCISE, aka LAME.  So enjoy my blue-less swatch photos, cuz BEST BLOGGER EVER, that’s why.

Gah!  So pretty.  The pink pulls you in, then the green makes you stay.  We are all just puddles of goo at this point.

The other half of the duo is Draught of Peace:

This one is a blue/purple/red/gold multichrome with the most amazing teal shift of your life!  It seriously just glows and glows and glows.  This one’s getting shoved up in stranger’s faces, I just know it.  Possibly in a slightly more stalker-y kind of way, as strangers don’t wanna Look at mah nails! quite like you’d expect.  I mean, I get it.  Cuz if anyone comes running up to me with their jazz hands on, one of them better be handing me a Starbucks.  OR ELSE.

Can we ever just look at this one time WITHOUT the hassle of the drool and the buckets and the Ugly Ecstasy Face and whatnot?  Cuz hubby is starting to feel sad about this pile of noodle legs he’s married to.  I mean, the traditional 5th anniversary gift is WOOD and I swear if I get cheated out of my popsicle stick Titanic and little toothpick Leonardo, someone’s getting a karate chop.  

The round up:

Yep.  You’re buying it.  A decision has been made.  Both polishes in this duo are delicious two-coat dreamboats, and I see no logical other way.  Okay, maybe you don’t like pretty things.  Or maybe you have no eyes.  I dunno.  But after that, nothing.  27 bottles, in the cart they go!

To order, you gotta be a member of the Multichrome Madness group on Facebook.  Click here to join, then head over to the Stella Chroma store by clicking here.  This duo is only available until July 31, so if you can’t go now – although WHY NOT?! is the actual question – be sure to set some alarms so you don’t miss out.  Cuz who wants to wake up August 1st so very sad and duo-less? CERTAINLY NOT YOU.

Single bottles retail for $13

Duo retails for $24

Happiness is PRICELESS.

Short and sweet tonight, although it still took 18 years to write.  Ugh.  One day I’ll get really good at this, I swear it.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul11

Nail Hoot + Top Shelf Lacquer Collaboration Duo

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When your husband asks you what your plans are for his birthday and you answer “painting my nails,” just be aware the reaction you get isn’t quite as exciting as you’d expect.

So now I’m forced to do stuff outside the house this weekend, which requires slightly less pajamas than originally planned. Ugh. I suppose if there’s any one thing worth putting pants on for 72 hours, it’d be him.  He’s a good guy. He pulls 18,000 nail polish packages out of the mailbox and only gives a skosh of a side eye.

Until then, though, it’s business as usual. Swatching and blogging and Full House marathons. Eating Funyuns, locked alone in a room, and wondering why skinny is taking so damn long. You know, if I wasn’t such a Trophy Wife, we’d all be worried. 

Here’s something pretty:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

This duo is a collaboration between Brandie with Nail Hoot and Amy with Top Shelf Lacquer, which started out as a joke.  Brandie had a naming contest in her Facebook group, and Amy suggested the name “Hoot This Way.”  For every contest after that, Amy continued to submit “Hoot This Way” as her entry.  Finally, Brandie agreed to the name as long as she could name one of Amy’s polishes, and VOILA! a duo is born.  And good news, guys:  you’re buying it.  Weeeeee!

First half of the duo is from Nail Hoot. Here is – FINALLY, in all its glory – Hoot This Way:

Worth the wait.  Yes?  YES.

DESCRIPTION: A rose gold holographic with strong gold flash

COATS:  Two, but good coverage in one

If you’re a fan of neutrals, you’re gonna love this one.  It’s the perfect polish for elegant, hand model-y, tiny cappucino cup holding scenarios.  As we all do from time to time.

I did some nail art:

I might’ve accidentally got my birds confused on this one, cuz the longer I look at my ring finger, the more I am convinced that’s not a flamingo.  Either that, or there’s some serious leg envy happening with the other flamingos.  Ring Finger Flamingo is my baby sister who is lovely and lithe; Other Finger Flamingo is me who has a problem with potato chips.  Ugh.

Used the Lina 4 Seasons – Summer 02 plate in case you’re curious.  

The last half of the duo is from Top Shelf Lacquer. Here is Drunk & Disorderly:

Ooooh!  There’s an accidental painting of all the surfaces lurking, I just know it.

DESCRIPTION: A medium blue crelly with scattered holo, a subtle purple shift and color-shifting chameleon flakies

COATS:  Two, nice and smooth

But back to those flakies.  Are they not divine?!  Seriously, if you came here for the ladylike composure, well now is not the time for a flakie display.  Cuz the amount of drool buckets happening over here is quite alarming to say the least.  OMG, am I still married?  I don’t even know.

Some mediocre mojo:

Do not ask why I did sharks.  Sometimes when I nail art, my brain just goes away somewhere.  I mean, it’s not the worst thing I’ve ever done, but an award is definitely not coming this time.  Although I’ll take a Starbucks anyway, you know, if y’all not busy.

Used the Lina 4 Seasons – Summer 02 plate again in case recreations are in order.  (They’re not.)  NEXT.

The round up:

This precious little duo releases this Friday, July 14 so make sure you set approximately 17 alarms cuz rational behavior is for other people.  There are 25 sets ready to go for immediate shipping, and POLISH EMERGENCY doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario. However, in case your priorities aren’t properly categorized, alphabetized and assorted by size and color then pre-orders will be taken until August 15.  Targeted ship date on those is August 30, otherwise known as FREAKING LIGHT YEARS AWAY.

In other words, you better snag those first 25.  DO IT.  I mean it.

Price for the duo is $18 and they will ship internationally, so it’s an equal opportunity good day for everyone!  Click here for shopping,

Some linky loos:

Nail Hoot – Instagram – Facebook – Facebook Fan Group

Top Shelf Lacquer – Instagram – Facebook – Facebook Fan Group

And while you’re in a clicking mood, follow me on Instagram.  Cuz at this point, it’s just the right thing to do.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul10

Cupcake Polish: Mod About You Collection 

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Who else was forced to spend the weekend playing grocery store and eating fake food off a plastic plate with a 4 year old? Damn near nobody but me, I’m quite certain.  This is what happens when everyone in your family knows where to find you: at home, lounging on couches at least 97.7459% of the time.  So when asked, What are you doing this Friday night?, coming up with an excuse of anything else based outside my living room is both nigh on impossible and a bold-faced lie.  Looks like a slumber party with the grandchildren then.  I’m weeeeee!-ing on the inside, I swear it.

Although, things went pretty smooth for the most part.  I mean, I somehow managed to play Shopkins for hours without getting down in the floor for any of it, which is literally a miracle to the trillionth degree. Cuz I don’t know about you, but getting back up off the floor is some whole other layer of effort I’m not ready to commit to. Once I’m down, I’M DOWN FOR LIFE.

The not so smooth part?  When the oldest granddaughter had an expert level, Oscar-worthy meltdown cuz Gigi ate all the Doritos.  I felt kinda bad about it, but they were Cool Ranch flavor so technically I had no choice. One day she’ll understand.

So here I am, starting a blog after midnight cuz my brain hasn’t quite gone back to normal yet.  BEST IDEA EVER.  Most likely it won’t get published tonight as Full House is on TV, and we all know what kind of black hole vacuum that show is.  But an attempt has been made, just so you know.

Another new collection from Cupcake Polish is on the blog today!  Sara sent me her new Mod About You collection, a glorious set of 6 vibrant holographics inspired by the mod 1960s.  Who’s ready to look at pretty things?  EVERY DADGUM ONE OF US, that’s who.  So lessss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

I’ll be honest:  I thought there’d be more mustard yellow Tupperware colors in here, so clearly my view of the 1960s is rather skewed.  Mustard yellow probably came out in the 70s anyway, and the point I am making is basically moot.  Although it’s the avocado green stuff we really care about anyway, cuz where there is green there is me with my grabby fingers sticking out.

OMG, what are we even talking about right now?  Gah!  Shut up, brain.

Let’s do noodle legs instead.  Cuz a parade of much classier shades is on the way!  Formula and application on these is consistent across the board, so here’s a quick rundown of the colors.  Meet you at the bottom!

First up is Mod Squad, a royal purple linear holographic:

Do you hear angels?  Cuz I hear angels.  And horn toots and confetti poppers too, prolly.

Then I put on pants:

Or “went outside” as others like to call it.

Next up is Gettin’ Twiggy With It, a gunmetal linear holographic:

You thought it was just gonna be a grey didn’t you? Tsk tsk. It’s grey with jazz hands, clearly. 

Again with the pants:

That’s two efforts in a row, in case you don’t math well.

Now here’s Suitor on a Scooter, a medium blue linear holographic:

Or maybe it’s turquoise.  I dunno.  Blue, turquoise, potato, french fry; either way, it’s all good.

A shot under the lamps instead cuz this pants thing is getting ridiculous:

Still drool-y though!

Here’s Look at You Go-Go, a dove grey linear holographic:

So here’s your grey with, like, just some sweatpants on.  But ones from Victoria’s Secret though, so we can maintain at least an “air” of sexy in case actual sexy is too much effort for a Monday.

At this point, we’re not even sure whose blog this is, aka someone went outside again:

PROFESSIONAL BLOGGER EXTRAORDINAIRE is what you’re thinking.

Next up is Crazy Mod Love, a berry pink linear holographic:

Don’t mind me! I’ll just be over here reattaching my jaw to my face for the next 37 years.  K, bye. 

Outside, and the pants are officially worth it:

You done died.  You did.

Lastly, here’s Fringe Benefits, a royal blue linear holographic:

And then all the wallets fell right out of our purses, just 👏🏼 like 👏🏼 that 👏🏼 BOOM. 

One more for under the lamps:

Simply put, an ocean of lovely.

The round up:

As mentioned before, formula and application on each polish is the same. I did two coats for my swatches, but one coat had really good coverage in case you don’t have time to sit for 17 hours painting nails like me.

This collection is available now, so get on it boo boos!  Price is $13 each and the PERFECT way to spend some money today.  Cuz who sees this much holo then continues about all normal and whatnot?  CERTAINLY NOT YOU.  Cuz now is not the time for rational behavior, that’s why.  Click here for shopping!

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul6

Rise and Shine Nail Lacquer: Fantasy Horses Trio

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We were all eating cake and ice cream outside in the dark, and OMG what if a bug flew in it or maybe some firework ashes, and we all just sat there putting poison in our mouths and not even knowing it?  Excuse me while I go self diagnose myself on the internet for the next 37 years. Ugh.

On a less mental note, our pre-4th of July party turned out nice, even though I had to wear pants for the entire length of it.  And I wasn’t allowed to take the chips and dip and lock myself into a room alone cuz according to the Universe, that’s not good party etiquette. Boooooo. BUT OTHER THAN ALL THAT, you know, blah blah blah …

Being social is hard you guys. SO HARD. I mean, anyone care to come over and watch me paint my nails for nigh on eternity?  No?  Well, that fixes that.  AN ATTEMPT WAS MADE.  Back into pajamas we go!

But good thing there’s nail polish!  I have some goodies to share with you from a relatively new brand called Rise and Shine Nail Lacquer.  Sarah’s latest collection is this pretty little set of polishes called the Fantasy Horses Trio, and if you love yourself a bit of multichrome, well you’re about to have yourself a var var good day. Take a look at what you’re buying:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

And in one fell swoop, jaws are dropping everywhere.  BOOM.  Well, we all knew we’d get unattractive at some point in here. Might as well start early.

First up is Kelpie:

DESCRIPTION:  Black base that shifts between green and gold with a bit of turquoise at the edges

COATS:  Two, but one covered nicely

Oooooh, a GREEN!  You have my attention already.  This one spoke to me for sure.  Most likely with a French accent, handing me a Starbucks.

Captured more of the black here:

Another angle so I could show off more colors:

Bahaha.  I’m sooo good at nails!  I tried though – and that’s about 97.59675% more effort than a normal day.

Macros, because I swear I’m gonna find that turquoise!

Mayyyyyybe in that last one, like right at the left edge?  Yes?  YES.  We’re moving on before we all go crazy.

Best blogger ever?  You are CORRECT.

Next up is Pegasus:

DESCRIPTION:  Peach with a gold to green shift

COATS:  Two

The glow on this one is plain ridiculous.  I couldn’t quite capture the green shift the way I wanted though, but wearing this, we are FANCY LADIES, and really not much else matters anyway.  I mean, I guess it could come with a side of Leonardo.  But after that, nothing.

A skosh of green-y gold in the glare at the bottom:

Or maybe I have no eyes.  I dunno.

Lastly, here’s Dark Unicorn:

DESCRIPTION:  A multichrome that shifts from silver to purple to green with a dash of holographic glitter

COATS:  Basically one, but I did two for safety

Time for drooling!  Plus noodle legs, plus tongue lolling.  For real, if divorce happens next, no one’s surprised.  Hubby just needs to look away every once in a while. Gah!  The judgy eyes:  they’re always lurking.

This one definitely has a silver tone to it:

And this one has more purple:

And now here’s that green shimmer:

Did y’all just scroll to the top to see what blog you were reading? I know, me too!  So much overachieve-y for someone on the 18,000th level of LAZY.  Captured all the shifts this time like a DADGUM PROFESSIONAL.  Next up, world peace; I’m quite certain of it.

The round up:

These multichrome beauties are available now so guess who’s about to spend some money?  (You, to be clear.)  Here’s what you need to know:

The trio retails for $27.95

Single bottles are $10.95 (except you’re buying all three, so this point is moot)

Sarah also has several other polishes in her store, so feel free to toss a bunch in the cart without even looking.  Cuz no one does Crazy Nail Lady quite like you.  Click here for shopping!

Okay gang, that’s it for now.  Off to do some swatching and most likely an accidental Full House marathon.  More fun stuff tomorrow!

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul3

Different Dimension: Sun of a Beach Collection 

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CAN’T. STOP. BLOGGING.  You’d think we’d all be taking a break around here, considering the amount of carpal tunneling happening over the weekend.  BUT NO.  This train keeps moving even though the body is practically comatose.  Surprisingly, the blog don’t write itself, so here we are:  functioning, although with at least one eye closed, and waiting for hubby to get up so I can suggest he bring snacks back from the kitchen.

He loves being married to me, I just know it.

I’ll make this brief cuz I know we’re all tired from Blogging EXTRAVAGANZA! circa 19 hours ago.  As for me, hubby decides we’re hosting a pre-4th of July cookout which means I have to be social against my will.  So I have half a second to get this thing done before a crap ton of people are in my house trying to eat around the nail polish I have stashed all over my kitchen table.  I mean, just cuz we’re having company doesn’t mean I’m going to pretend I don’t have a hoarding problem.  You don’t get to Lazy, Level EXPERT by going the extra mile.

I have some of the most glorious neons to show you today.  Missi from Different Dimension sent me her Sun of a Beach collection to review, and I swear it’s 18,000 tickets to the Drool Convention, at minimum.  Cuz THESE. ARE. FABULOUS.  Here’s proof:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Ugh.  See?  If you somehow make it out of this blog without spending some money, I am var var concerned about your brain.  Cuz your summer NEEDS these.  Plus 27 backups.  Clearly, this is not a time to be rational.

The formula on these is consistent on all five.  Very smooth and easy to apply.  Not too thick but definitely not runny.  The colors are bright and cheerful and so full of happiness, if Leonardo happened next, no one would be surprised.  Cuz we’re all having the best day ever, that’s why.

Here’s a rundown of the colors, then I’ll meet you at the bottom!

First up is 99 Problems and a Beach Ain’t One:

DESCRIPTION:  Neon magenta jelly base with color shifting glitters and holographic microflakies

COATS:  Two of the most delicious

Next is Tropic Like It’s Hot:

DESCRIPTION: Neon orange jelly base with color shifting glitters and holographic microflakies

COATS:  Three.  Could’ve been two if I had used a thicker bead on my brush, but I was trying to be a lady about it.

Now here’s Girls Just Wanna Have Sun:

DESCRIPTION: Neon yellow jelly base with color shifting glitters and holographic microflakies

COATS:  Three.  Since this is a lighter color, I definitely needed more than two.  Actually, just 2-1/2 coats, but I’m pretty sure that’s not a thing.

Next up is Wanna Get Lei’d:

DESCRIPTION: Neon green jelly base with color shifting glitters and holographic microflakies

COATS:   Uhhhhhhhnnnnnn, GREEEEEEEN.  I’m sorry, what is your question?  Probably did three coats, but I’ll be honest:  my brain done went somewhere.

Lastly, here’s Don’t Get Tide Down:

DESCRIPTION: Neon blue jelly base with color shifting glitters and holographic microflakies

COATS:   Three.  In fact, they all took three except for the pink one, which leads me to believe I obviously did it wrong.  I stink at nails.  Booooo.

The round up:

This collection released just this morning, so get on it, boo boos!  Polishes are $10 each, but if you purchase the entire collection before 9am EST tomorrow, you can snag a discount.  Basically, a legit POLISH EMERGENCY is what I’m saying.  Click here for shopping!

Now congratulations on your good decisioning.  You may continue to read this blog.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul2

PART 3 Polish Pickup July 2017: Cocktails & Mocktails

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We’re finally here.  Part 3 of this blogging EXTRAVAGANZA!  I’ve been writing all day long, ignoring responsibilities like a DADGUM CHAMPION.  Hubby tried to remind me there was a sink full of dishes, and I just laughed and laughed and laughed. Cuz clearly I AM BUSY and I only took a break one time to change the wallpaper in my fake bakery.

And if that’s not enough overachieve-y for you, there’s a strong possibility I’m blogging from the bathtub.  I mean, the blog don’t write itself now does it?  And the legs don’t shave themselves either.  Booooo.

Before you continue, I highly recommend reading Parts 1 and 2 first.  I’ve left links for you at the bottom of this post.  I’d put them up top for you as well, but honestly, we’ve had enough effort on display over here to last us at least 37 years.

Soooo, doing my deed as the designated blogger for the July Polish Pickup cuz apparently someone out there likes this weird little world I live in.  Okay, 9 more to go!  Let’s get into it.

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •


As a reminder, the theme for July is Cocktails & Mocktails.  As your Speling Bee Champion of 1987, REST ASSURED.  It is quite possible to be booed on your 21st birthday for sipping a Jagermeister shot like a fancy lady.  But despite all that, I am an extremely cool person.

______________________________ 

CHIRALITY POLISH:  Blended Frost

DESCRIPTION:  A medium blue holo base with subtle hints of green within the holo rainbow

COATS:  Exceptional coverage in one. I did two for funsies, but some may be okay with just one. 

This is my first go with Chirality Polish, and lemme just say I am beyond impressed.  This polish is gorgeous!  The green hints turns the color almost like a teal blue/green and for real, my brain has stopped holding my mouth closed.  Someone’s getting unattractive!  Hubby needs to look away, cuz there’s only so much sexy to go around while your tongue is lolling about outside your body.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.chiralitypolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/chiralitynailpolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/chiralitypolish

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BLUSH LACQUERS:  Mojito Mondays 

DESCRIPTION:  A soft lime linear holographic base with golden shimmer and gold to lime green shifting holo glitters

COATS:  Two very smooth, quick and easy ones. The applicator brush practically needs a luxury tax on it cuz OMG, it’s fabulous!

Listen, if you read my blog, you all know I swatch a lot of BLUSH.  Victoria makes some of the most breaktaking, stunning and unique polishes I’ve ever seen.  If you haven’t tried her stuff, you need to at least start with this one.  It’s happiness in a bottle.  With a Leonardo on top, for sure.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12.75

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/blushlacquers

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/blushlacquers

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/groups/blushbeauties

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PAHLISH:  The Green Muse

DESCRIPTION:  A super bright acid green foil

COATS:  Two, amazingly smooth

You’re looking at four fingers of Green Apple Jolly Rancher goodness, and I swear I’d lick it if SOCIETY wasn’t so judgy.  Cuz what is the point in life if you can’t lick a juicy green nail polish every once in a while?  I ask you, WHAT IS THE POINT?  Might taste slightly more poison-y, but we’ll never know for sure.  Behaving normal is zero fun sometimes.

Under the lamps: 

Macros: 

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://pahlish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/pahlish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/pahlish

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ANONYMOUS LACQUER:  Jamaican Me Smile

DESCRIPTION:  A light pink/rose gold linear holographic with strong gold shimmer

COATS: Two, nice and smooth

Oh, now this!  What a delicate and soothing shade.  It’s just so lovely to look at, with that gold shimmer peeking through.  This polish practically begs to hold a tiny cappucino; it’s dainty and so sweet.  Or if you’re having little sandwiches later, you’re already halfway prepared.  Tea with the Queen?  BRING IT.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://anonymouslacquer.bigcartel.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/anonymouslacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/anonymouslacquer

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CONTRARY POLISH:  Sweet Poison

DESCRIPTION:  A blue leaning green with aqua shimmer, sapphire microflakies and a light linear holo effect

COATS:  Two, the most beautiful of your life!

Someone needs to wheel me over one of those old fashioned fainting couches, cuz I am legit DONE with being upright.  There’s a noodle leg epidemic happening, and WE. ARE. IN IT.  There’s drool buckets and smelling salts and general unattractiveness.  Quick! lock the door, lest hubby walks in and divorces me.

In other words, I reallllllly love this polish.  You will too.  Good news:  you’re buying it.

Under the lamps:

Macros: 

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://contrarypolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/contrarypolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/contrarypolish

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FANCHROMATIC NAILS:  Wildfire

DESCRIPTION:  A neon yellow/green base with holographic gold and silver flakies, shimmer and microglitter with a smattering of larger holo silver and gold glitter. Glows in dark and under black light for those who have more exciting lives than me. 

COATS:  Three thin coats, and still only the tiniest bit of nail line peeks through.

Well, you had me at greeeen.  I enjoyed this polish a lot.  Neon is always so fun.  The application of this one is very smooth and kind of addicting.  I don’t even know why, as there’s not even any Starbucks in it.  And Leonardo is no where to be seen.  But I just loved putting it on my nails.  It was almost a Polish Mountain-type scenario, except I gave up after three coats.  I’m not very good at goals, let’s just say.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://fanchromaticnails.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/fanchromaticnails

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/fanchromaticnails

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ANCHOR & HEART LACQUER:  Hello Jello Hangover 

DESCRIPTION:  A linear holographic base with gold shimmer, silver holo micro shreds and an assortment of fun glitters in matte, holo and iridescent finishes

COATS:  Three thin coats on this one, although two might be okay for some. 

A legit no joke carnival celebration!  This polish is fun and festive and full of joy.  Perfect for party nails.  Or napping nails, you know, if you’re me.  Cuz parties require going outside, and going outside requires pants, so at this point I’m just gonna have to pass. And society frowns on pants-less outdoor escapades, I’m almost certain.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/anchorheartlacquer

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/anchorheartlacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/anchorheartlacquer

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LEESHA’S LACQUER:  Tequila Sunrise

DESCRIPTION:  A sunset orange to yellow thermal with a smattering of holo

COATS:  Three, although two looked pretty good

Oh, thermals, my evil friend. Picture it: me, in the floor by the air vent, with my hand in a glass of ice water, having anxiety.  And then trying to photograph it all before the thermal changed.  Honestly, there were probably about 7,397 attempts before I finally found my groove.  At that point, my reaction time between ice water, towel, and hands in the light box, was approximately NASCAR pit crew changing a set of tires plus trying to get a bee out of my car during lunch break divided by scrolling by a surprise photo of a snake coming out of a toilet on Facebook.

So here’s to at least 19 hours of my life.  Here’s the warm to cool transition:

Just the warm state:

Now just the cold state:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.leeshaslacquer.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/leeshaslacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/leeshaslacquer 

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TOADARRIFIC VINYLS

There’s not just polish available at the Polish Pickup.  Teanna has three nail arty things to offer this month, all cocktail related and stinkin adorable!

First are the stencils:

Clearly, I’m no expert, but at least an attempt was made.  Worth half a horn toot at least.

Now here’s where the awesome photography skills kick in. Get ready!

Some cocktail decals:

These have a gorgeous iridescent finish on them, which I tried to capture in my photo. I mean, if your first thought was PROFESSIONAL, you are correct. 

Price: $5 for both the stencils and decals, sold as a combo

And finally, a large decal for your Helmer:

Same iridescent finish. The transfer film is still on this decal, but would be removed when you actually use it, so the colors really pop out.  Also, the sausage fingers are lurking.  Ew.

Price: $3/each

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/kissingtoadlacquer

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/toadarrific_vinyls

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/toadarrificvinyls

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GUYS. We made it!  This is the real true end; you read all the way to the bottom!  Toots for you, my friend, for your perseverence or at least reading all this with just one of your eyes closed.  And now you are properly armed with a shopping list and a hoard all the polish kind of game plan.  Y’all ready to spend some money?  Cuz it’s bye bye checkbook in 3 … 2 … 1 …

Shop opens Friday, July 7 at 11am EST and will stay open until Monday, July 10 at 1159pm EST.  If you’re not setting like 17 alarms, I am var var concerned about your brain.  Click here for shopping!  And in case you didn’t read the other parts to the most ginormous blog post in all the land, here’s more things to click on: 

Part 1

Part 2

There are a few makers that will be selling polish that I did not get to feature.  Be sure to be on the lookout for what Lilypad Lacquer, Darling Diva Polish and Supernatural Lacquer has to offer as well.  I’ve seen sneak peeks, and basically you’re gonna want them too.

Lastly, let me just say THANK YOU to Sarah and Adrienne, the Polish Pickup creators (and founders of Fair Maiden Polish) for having me blog this most prestigious opportunity.  It has been beyond fun, and I’m grateful to have been chosen to share my love for nail polish and my weird little blog with so many people.  And to the makers who sent me their polishes to swatch, well how very BAD ASS are you?  I hope I’ve done them justice and that you sell a trillion bottles because of it.

Til next time …

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul2

PART 2 Polish Pickup July 2017: Cocktails & Mocktails

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Wasn’t I just in here blogging?  I swear I was.

Welcome to Part 2 of the insanity, guys!  In case you just jumped in here in the middle like a crazy person, there’s a whole other Part 1 you need to read first.  DO IT.  I’m serious.  Click here.

Brief reiteration of what we’re doing.  I got chosen to blog for the Polish Pickup for the month of July and I’ve got a crap ton of polishes to show you before the carpal tunnel sets in.  Trying to keep things short and sweet, as I know we all don’t lounge around on couches doing nothing like me.  You and your fancy life.  Ugh.

I’m about to get 97.7668% more chatty, so let’s reel it in.  Here’s 10 more things you’re buying:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •


The theme for the July Polish Pickup is Cocktails & Mocktails, so everything in here is inspired by a drink.  Considering I can make one wine cooler last a whole three hours, I’d say 1) they chose the PERFECT month for me to blog, and 2) I’m super fun at parties.  

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STELLA CHROMA:  Blackberry Mint Moscow Mule

DESCRIPTION:  A nude crelly with green/purple ultra chameleon chrome flakies and a heavy dose of copper flakies

COATS:  Only needed two

This one is one of the most unique polishes of the bunch.  I don’t normally wear nude polishes cuz my sad white sausages look even more sausage-y when I wear neutrals.  HOWEVER.  The flakies in here are unreal!  They completely transform this polish and now I want to wear it on all FIVE fingers like a normal person.  The thumbs are about to get some luvin’!

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.stellachroma.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/stellachroma

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/stellachroma

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TURTLE TOOTSIE POLISHES:  Galaxy Cocktail

DESCRIPTION:  A blurple holographic with pink shimmer and blue and purple chameleon flakies

COATS:  Excellent coverage in one, but needed two to make it perfect

Seriously, those little dots of blue peeking through, I want a trillion more of those!  I love those unexpected little surprises that only indie brands can do.  Plus, no one hates a blue and purple combo now do they?  Unless you don’t like pretty things, or maybe you have no eyes.  I dunno.

Under the lamps: 

Macros:

Price: $10.50

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.turtletootsiepolishes.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/turtletootsiepolishes

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/turtletootsiepolishes

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LOLLIPOP POSSE LACQUER:  Gin and Juice

DESCRIPTION:  A holographic gold to green duochrome that suspends gold flakies

COATS:  I did three coats although two might’ve been fine, but when I’m using one of Karen’s polishes, my brain just goes away somewhere.

Side note:  the more thin your coats, the better the flakies show up.  Also, Snoop Dog was the inspo for this polish although Karen said it’s not official.  But he is, I’m sure of it.  And lastly, the drool is getting ridiculous.  Bah!

Under the lamps:

Macros: 

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://lollipopposselacquer.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/lollipopposselacquer 

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/Lollipop-Posse-Lacquer-720218501425617

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SEVENTY SEVEN NAIL LACQUER:  Cherry on Top

DESCRIPTION:  A bright coral base with red, orange and slightly pink shimmer

COATS:  Formula is very sheer but builds up nicely. I did three coats and my nail line is still only slightly visible but not enough for me to do a fourth coat. Effort on a Sunday? No thank you!

This color is a hot little mama!  So vibrant and bold, and about 2.5 seconds away from HAND MODEL! if you ask me.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://seventysevennaillacquer.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/77naillacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/77naillacquer

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SASSY PANTS POLISH:  Anything But Blue in Hawaii


DESCRIPTION:  A vibrant blue jelly base with blue/green shifting shimmer and sprinkling of iridescent flakies

COATS:  Three thin coats as formula is pretty sheer, although it builds up well. Can get thick if you add too many coats, so go thin!

Mannnn, do I have a soft spot for jellies.  I want to swim in a huge bathtub full of this one.   The blue shade is bright and cheerful but very bold.  Who’s sticking their fingers in stranger’s faces and making them look at mah nails!  THIS LADY.  Clearly, I need supervised.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $11.50

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.sassypantspolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/sassypantspolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/sassypantspolish

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TOP SHELF LACQUER:  Flaming Sambuca Shots

DESCRIPTION:  A bluish black base with blue/purple/red shifting shimmer and multicolored shifting ultra chameleon chrome flakies

COATS:  Two, full of magic

The July Polish Pickup wouldn’t be proper without a Top Shelf polish in it.  Amy’s brand is all about the cocktails so naturally the universe done tipped sideways til we knew for sure:  TOP SHELF IS COMING, and now we can all breath again.  Thank God, too.  I was trying to be a trooper, but I can hold my breath for 17 seconds just fine until I’m told I HAVE to hold my breath for 17 seconds.

Aside from all that, though, flakies flakies everywhere, and in the cart she goes!

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price:  $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.topshelflacquer.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/topshelflacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/topshelflacquer

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LE POLISH:  The Bees Knees

DESCRIPTION:  A white crelly with purple and yellow microflakies and gold shimmer

COATS:  Three, although two probably looks just fine. I felt like maybe I could see a bit of sheerness at two, but I was also painting with one eye closed so what do I know really?

There are so many flakies in here, that the white base looks lavender to me.  Again, I was in the midst of a 9 hour swatch fest, so perhaps I was painting with BOTH eyes closed at this point.  Trust me, it’s happened before.  This mani is the result of a damn near miracle.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.lepolish.bigcartel.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/lepolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/lepolishnailpolish

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PRETTY JELLY:  Old Fashioned 

DESCRIPTION:  A burnt sienna jelly with holographic flakies and red/gold shimmer

COATS:  Two, extremely smooth and flowy

The fact the ice cream truck drove by at the exact moment I was using this and I somehow managed to not get up and run down the street in pajamas is a testament to the gloriousness of this polish.  It’s the color of sunlight through a glass of bourbon, so basically, NAILED IT doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://prettyjelly.etsy.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/prettyjellynail

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/prettyjellynailpolish

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MY STUNNING NAILS:  Mint Julep

DESCRIPTION:  A pastel pearlized green base with a beautiful mix of powder and green, gold and silver hexagon glitters

COATS:  Two! This polish appeared to be thicker than it actually was, and it went on very smooth and easy.

Another new to me brand!  This one is a fun one, for sure.  I don’t think I’ve ever used a pearlized base before, and the finish of it is super cool. And although it has a different look to it, with top coat the surface dries completely glassy.   Well, and don’t even get me started on those tiny green glitters.  Cuz I could just sit here and love them for the next 37 years.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $9.95

Linky loos:

Shop http://mystunningnails.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/mystunningnails

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/mystunningnails

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MS SPARKLE:  Unicorn Frappe

DESCRIPTION:  A purple-ish neon red with blue shift, teal iridescent glitters, black iridescent microglitters, spectraflair, baby blue microshreds, aqua shreds and unicorn flakies

COATS:  Three.  Formula was thin and a little goes a long way, so be careful unless you feel like cleaning up your cuticles for nigh on eternity.

This little lady is BRIGHT.  My camera had issues and about just shrugged its shoulders and walked straight out of the room.  But we persevered y’all!  Or at least an attempt was made.  For real, I know I just won an award and everything, but if you’re handing out Starbucks to celebrate all the overachieve-y happening over here, I’m pretty sure that sounds about right.

But also: this polish is really beautiful.

Outside:

Macros:

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.mssparkleboutique.etsy.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/ms_sparkle_polish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/ms.sparkle.polish

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Once again, the Polish Pickup shop opens Friday, July 7 at 11am EST and will stay open until Monday, July 10 at 1159pm EST.  You can click here for shopping, but you’re reading Parts 1 and 3 first.  Cuz by now you’ve invested some time, and quite honestly, it’s the right thing to do. 

Part 1

Part 3

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jul2

PART 1 Polish Pickup July 2017: Cocktails & Mocktails

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GUYS. After all the blogs I’ve written, assuming an award would be coming any day now – either for a miraculous not-hideous nail art or maybe just because I wore pants on a Sunday –  well FINALLY all that efforting has paid off.  Cuz a legit no joke award has officially come.  I’ll be honest:  I was just thinking maybe y’all would get me a Starbucks or something.  But OMG, NO; it’s wayyyyy better.

Sarah and Adrienne, the awesome gals behind the Polish Pickup (as well as Fair Maiden Polish), asked me to be the designated blogger for the month of July.   Whaaaaaa?!  For real, are angels singing?  Cuz I swear I hear angels.  And a full toot on my own horn, at the minimum.  Cuz I rarely win anything.  I mean, I guess I did win 48 rolls of toilet paper in the work raffle, but that point is moot.

So listen, this is gonna be a super big blog post.  There are 29 polishes to go over that’ll take at least 18 years to read, so make sure you have snacks and some diabetic circulation socks handy cuz basically you’re not moving for a really long time.  I mean, if I’m about to give myself a wicked case of carpal tunnel, you’re about to look at some nail polish for nigh on eternity.  Who’s getting excited then?  EVERY DADGUM ONE OF US, that’s who.  Lessss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

For those who aren’t familiar with the Polish Pickup, I’ll give you a very brief synopsis.  Each month there is a theme that is nominated and voted on by the members of the Polish Pickup group on Facebook.  The makers who participate will create exclusive polishes based on that theme, the shop goes live on the first Friday thru Monday of the month, and then we all thank Baby Jesus for the internet, otherwise there’d be some Black Friday-style elbow jabbing happening everywhere.  Come Tuesday, the shop is closed and the polish goes away forever.  Are you properly panicked?  Well you should be.  It’s a  POLISH EMERGENCY! at it’s most finest.

To read more about it, click here.

Okay, no more chatty.  There’s some serious business up ahead.  EVERYONE:  prepare for the noodle legs, cuz it’s about to get suuuuuper pass-out-y up in here.   This month’s theme is Cocktails & Mocktails, so if you need a reason to have a wine cooler on a Sunday morning, this here’d be it. 

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ALTER EGO:  Silver Cocktail

DESCRIPTION:  A silver holographic base with just a hint of gold

COATS:  Opaque in two; ultra smooth 

I reallllly love this color.  It’s a simple and elegant shade, but that holo is straight up ridiculous.  About 27 levels of gorgeousness.  And Queen of England-approved, in case y’all are having sandwiches later.  As happens from time to time.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $7

Linky loos:

Shop http://wisconsinsoap.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/alteregobodycareproducts

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/alteregobodycareproducts

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ELLAGEE:  Hard Cider

DESCRIPTION:  A luscious warm brown holographic with flashes of honey gold plus copper, bronze and gold microflakies

COATS:  Opaque in two; easy to apply

Did someone just wrap me up in a thousand toasty blankets and hand me a bunch of kitties?  Might as well have!  This polish is a comfy cozy dreamboat, and we lub her so much.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://ellagee.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/ellageepolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/ellageepolish

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POLISH MY LIFE:  Passion Peach Sangria

DESCRIPTION:  A light peach/mild orange crelly with white and rainbow flakies for the perfect shimmer

COATS:  Formula was thicker than average so I added several drops of thinner to ease application. Two coats was good coverage but I did three to smooth everything out. 

The flakies in this one are a bit shy to capture, but in person you can see them easier.  I mean, it’s not a flakie EXTRAVAGANZA! or anything, but sometimes you just want something a little more chill.  We’re not always feeling our jazz hands, now are we?  And this peach color has just enough darkness in it to not wash out my see-thru skintone.  Bonus!

Outside:

Macros:

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.polishmylife.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/polishmylife

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/polishmylife

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NIGHT OWL LACQUER:  Dragon Blood

DESCRIPTION:  A yellowy neon green base with bright green sparks and ultra chameleon chrome flakies that shift red/copper/green/gold

COATS:  Three easy ones

If you’ve read this blog before – although WHY HAVEN’T YOU?! is the actual question – y’all know I have a thing for green.  Green is my happy place.  I mean, where there is green there is me picking my jaw off the floor like 18,000 times.  And then you go tossing flakies in it like NBD, and I swear I’ll never be normal again.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.nightowllacquer.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/nightowllacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/nightowllacquer

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NORTHERN STAR:  Shark Bite

DESCRIPTION:  An ocean blue base with red microflakies and blue shimmer

COATS:  I got opacity in 2, but some may need 3

This is my very first Northern Star polish, but it’s absolutely not my last.  Formula on this is beyond amazing, so fluid and practically silky.   The deep saturated color was a one way ticket to the Drool Convention, and I swear if I there weren’t like 24 more polishes to get through, I’d just go ahead and pass on out now.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $9

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.northernstarcosmetics.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/northernstarpolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/northernstarpolish

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MY INDIE POLISH:  Goodnight Puppy

DESCRIPTION:  A pink base with lots of depth and a neat green spark

COATS:  I did three even though two probably would’ve been just fine; no formula issues at all

This one makes me smiley, although not very adorably.  No, I’m just sitting here with my eyes closed, smiling to myself like an idiot cuz polish does things, and they’re not always pretty.  The Ugly Ecstasy Face, guys!  It’s getting very unattractive over here. 

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://myindiepolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/myindiepolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/indiepolish

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POLISH ‘M:  Ripped in Rio de Janeiro

DESCRIPTION:  A red/orange leaning coral with gold microflakies, red/gold microflakies and red and gold scattered galaxy holo

COATS:  Two of the smoothest of your life!

Oh, but this one!  What a spectacular shade for summer.  Seriously, you’re buying one bottle plus 27 backup bottles in case of accidental polishing of all the surfaces.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $9

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.polishm.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/creativenailchick

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/polishmpolish

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NAIL HOOT:  Berry Sexy Vanilla Sunrise

DESCRIPTION:  A berry holographic with a hint of a purple flash

COATS:  Opaque in a quick two

Nail Hoot was the very first indie brand polish I’d ever purchased over two years ago, and it’s because of Brandie that I even have this indie addiction.  Basically, if it wasn’t for Nail Hoot luring me into this fantastical new world, you wouldn’t be reading this blog right now.  It simply wouldn’t exist.  So now we all owe Brandie our firstborn childrens cuz I think that’s how this thing works, right?  I might be thinking of something else.  Either way, though, Brandie, THANK YOU!

Under the lamps:

Macros: 

Price: $9.75

Linky loos:

Shop http://nailhoot.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/nailhoot

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/nailhoot

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DIFFERENT DIMENSION:  Purple Rain

DESCRIPTION:  A mulberry purple linear holographic with added color shifting pigment and a gorgeous pink flash

COATS:  Opaque in basically one coat, but I did two to smooth out my strokes

Uhhhhhhhnnnnn.  Words have left me.  It’s seriously moan-y throat noises from here on out.  Purple lovers, you die!  How this blog is getting finished, well, wouldn’t we all like to know?

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://differentdimension.us

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/differentdimensionus 

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/difdimension

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FAIR MAIDEN POLISH:  Sparkling Sangria

DESCRIPTION:  A berry holographic with red flame and holographic sparkles

COATS:  Pretty much a one coater but I did two cuz CAN’T STOP POLISHING.

This is the perfect ending to Part 1 of the blog cuz nothing has you beggin for more like a sultry, sexy little red.  Seriously, are you hot?  Cuz I’m hot.  Don’t mind me and my sweat bead mustache.  Ugh.  Good thing I’ve got this Trophy Wife deal on lock, or else we’d all be worried.   

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.fairmaidenpolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/fairmaidenpolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/fairmaidenpolish

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The Polish Pickup shop will open on Friday, July 7 at 11am EST and will run thru Monday, July 10 until 11:59pm EST.  Click here for shopping, but only after you read parts 2 and 3.  WE ARE NOT DONE.  In fact, we’ve just gotten started.  Weeeee!

Part 2

Part 3

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Jun30

Glam Polish: Made in Manehattan Collection 

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Current status:  on the couch after dinner, pants unbuttoned, fat hanging out.  Hubby treated me to a really nice meal after work, and all was going well.  Then the gourmet french fries came out WITH MAYONNAISE DIPPING SAUCE! and basically if someone had rolled a wheelie cart over and offered me some walking assistance, I would have damn well taken it.   Seriously, if it’s my ladylike composure that impresses you most, DO NOT EVER put potatoes-anything on the table.  Just don’t do it.  It causes divorce, if I’m not mistaken.  Ugh.

And now I’m just sitting here being the most sexy wife that ever lived.  At least I’m not drooling though.  I mean, not yet anyway.

Cuz there’s polish coming.  And it’s Glam Polish, which has a 97.84854% chance of drool buckets, at minimum.  So let’s get unattractive together shall we, cuz that’s what best friends do.  Here’s the new Made in Manehattan collection:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Moany-y throat noises are about to come out.  Gah!  Words are proving to be var var hard right now.

The Made in Manehattan collection is a set of six cute shimmery shades inspired by the show, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.  And now we’re all about to spend some money cuz MY LITTLE PONY?!  It’s all my childhood dreams come true!  Toss in a room full of office supplies, and DREAM SCENARIO sounds about right.

Clearly, I’ve been a little weirdo for a very long time.

I’m gonna keep it somewhat short and sweet, as the five pastels are all the same in terms of formula and application.  I do have some nail art mixed in, though, so don’t scroll too fast. And then there’s a most stunning glitter topper at the end.  OMG, who’s getting pee-your-pants excited?  EVERY DADGUM ONE OF US, that’s who.

First up is Equestria Games – a light pastel lemon with subtle pink shimmer:

Close up of the goodies:

And then I added that glitter topper I was telling you about.  I can’t even stand how gorgoeus this is.  For real, I could look at it for days if there still wasn’t about 7,387 other blogs to write.

Kinda cute nail art:

Y’all know I have a love/hate relationship with my arting.  This one gets half a horn toot.  Used the new Uber Chic Beauty Unicorn Love plate if you’re curious.

Next is The Mane Attraction – a light pastel lavender with subtle pink shimmer:

Mood lighting.  Perfect for tongue lolling in secrecy.  But also makes for a pretty exquisite macro:

Still decent nail art:

A miracle might be happening!  That’s two not very hideous nail arts in a row!  Is there an award coming next?  I think YES.

Used the What’s Up Nails B002 plate for this one.

Now here’s Ponyville Confidential – a light pastel peach with subtle peach shimmer:

Some simple stamping:

I felt like this color needed something tropical.  I think it turned out okay.  I mean, it’s better than that meth owl I accidentally made, and for that, we are all grateful.  Used the new Uber Chic Beauty Vacation Mode plate here, which has some super cute images on it.  I recommend!

Here is No Second Prances – a light pastel blue with subtle pink shimmer:

Scroll past this one:


Bye bye mojo!  Meh.  Used the Uber Chic Beauty Unicorn Love plate again, and kinda failed a little bit.  Any kudos and accolades you wanna toss out for this one?  No?  Okay.  NEXXXXXXT.

This is Hearts and Hooves – a light pastel pink with subtle pink shimmer:

A slight reprieve:

The design turned out slightly more subtle than expected, but I didn’t throw any stamping plates across the room, so look who’s acting mature all of a sudden.

(Me, to be clear.  I KNOW, we’re all surprised.)

Used the What’s Up Nails B018 plate for this one.

So about that glitter topper.  Here’s The Crystal Empire – full of shifty iridescence with strong pink shimmer in a clear base:

I did three coats on naked nails, and it covers pretty good, although it looks way more awesome over a white base.  Of which I have none to show you because I am a PROFESSIONAL BLOGGER EXTRAORDINAIRE.

I don’t plan things very well, clearly.  But if you’ll scroll back up, all the macros with the topper on top – freaking MAGICAL. In one effortless coat, and well, you had me at effortless.

And then I officially ruined this blog:

Seriously, stamping with your eyes closed is never a good thing.  This is 27 levels of hideous at the minimum.  I kinda feel like just deleting it real quick, but once the pajamas go on, not much else happens after that.  In other words, a nap is coming soon.

Used the Uber Chic Beauty Garden Love plate in case recreations are in order. Bahahahahahahaha.

Ugh.

The round up:

As mentioned earlier, the formula on all the pastels are exactly the same.  I did three coats on each one, although two coats was really close to opaque for me.  Application was very smooth and easy, and the layers leveled out perfectly.  No streaks, no gloop, no cuss words, no crying.  I don’t know how Glam Polish does it every time, but finding a bad one is nigh on impossible.

The Made in Manehattan collection released earlier today, so head over to the Glam Polish store and toss a bunch of pretties in the cart.  I mean, you were just hanging around in your sweatpants doing nothing anyway.  Deets:

Single bottles are $12

Full collection is $72 but if you purchase by Tuesday, July 4 at 2pm EST, you’ll snag it for $64.80.  So get on it, boo boos!  Cuz you’re a Crazy Nail Lady, that’s why.  Click here for shopping!

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •