Tag Archives: nails

Oct17

The Holo Hookup: November 2017 – Galaxy

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Jumping right into the polish tonight cuz apparently there is a sink full of dishes that needs my attention.  Although if you’re asking my opinion, well CLEARLY hubby is wrong.  However, in an attempt to stay married – and to keep the sandwiches coming – I will oblige.  I mean, I guess technically it was the agreement anyway, settled back in 2011 after it took roughly 18 years for me to cut an onion.  He cooks, I do dishes.  Fiiiiiine.  So quick blog for y’all cuz hubby is ZERO fun sometimes.

It’s time for another Holo Hookup!  The November one specifically, which doesn’t even sound right.  Cuz it was April like yesterday, I swear it.  Ugh, winter is lurking y’all. Send hives cream.

Okay.  Nail polish.  Lesss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Holo holo everywhere, and in the cart they go!  Weeee!

So this month’s theme is Galaxy, and the HH ladies brought us this gorgeous palette of blues and purples to fit the theme perfectly.  Did y’all’s cat ears just perk up, cuz I know at least a trillion people who are having a realllly hard time staying vertical right now.  I mean, I get it.  Polish makes you swoon-y.  But polish the color of a sky full of science-y things?  Basically a noodle leg EXTRAVAGANZA!  In fact, if it came with a side of Leonardo, no one would be surprised.

Here’s the inspiration photo:

Yep.  NAILED IT doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.

Our usual culprit of Glisten & Glow, Different Dimension and Cupcake Polish is here, and they brought with them a whooooole lotta international gorgeousness.  Cuz this month’s featured brand is Femme Fatale all the way from Australia, so if you’ve been waiting for the right time to pass the hell on out, now would be it.  We lub Femme Fatale in here, just so you know.  Sophie’s polishes are little masterpieces, and hoarding at least 2,387 bottles sounds about right.  Complete rational behavior?  NOT TODAY!

Guests go first, cuz we all sorts of classy.  Take a look:

FEMME FATALE:  EXOSPHERE 

DESCRIPTION:  A berry holographic with turquoise shine and scattered silver holographic microglitters

OPACITY:  Two lovely coats

Seriously, as if we weren’t drool-y enough today.  Ladylike composure = out the dadgum windows with this one.

And then there was nail art:

And I don’t hate it!  I mean, it’s not gonna win an award or anything but that is beside the point.  Used the Uber Chic Beauty 18-02 plate in case you’re curious.

DIFFERENT DIMENSION:  COMET

DESCRIPTION:  A navy blue holographic with blue to green color shifting shimmers

OPACITY:  Two perfect coats

This one appears less navy more teal, but that’s just the green shimmers popping through.  Gah!  Told you there were science-y things in here.  Reading this blog suddenly got a bit more fancy.

More decent nail art:

Two decent ones in a row!  Whose blog are you reading, cuz it’s certainly not mine.

Layered stamping courtesy of the new Uber Chic Beauty 20-03 plate.  I somehow managed to line up the images pretty good this time, so if y’all got a horn handy, quick! lemme toot it.

CUPCAKE POLISH:  MILKY WAY

DESCRIPTION:  A creamy periwinkle holographic

OPACITY:  Two luscious coats

Purple lovers, you seeing this?!  Sometimes you don’t need frills when a simple, lovely holo will suffice just fine.  Although a dire case of the Grabby Fingers is happening, just so you know.  GIMME.

Kinda cute nail art:

Mojo hanging by a thread, though.  Y’all know we can’t keep a streak going forever.  Although, I’m mildly relieved cuz I’m not ready to commit to being too good at anything. Cuz I fixed the work copier just ONE time back in 2008, and now apparently I am a copier repairman with a side of doing my actual job. No, the expectation of being an expert is just too much to bear sometimes.

Pretty leaves stamped on using the Uber Chic Beauty Lovely Leaves 2 plate, one of my official favorites.

GLISTEN & GLOW:  ASTEROID BELT

DESCRIPTION:  A deep blackened indigo holographic with copper shimmer and tiny twinkling microglitters

OPACITY:  Two dreamy coats

Ummmmm, LITERALLY SPEECHLESS.  How the rest of this blog is getting written we’ll NEVER freaking know.

You know that mojo thing we were talking about?

Yeah, he gone now.  I dunno.  It’s not necessarily a nail fail, but kinda lacks inspiration.  However, dry brush skills are pretty much expert level, sooooo .. BONUS POINTS.  Bring it.

And now, more overachieve-y.  Nail art using all four polishes together:

For real, I don’t even know who I am anymore. How does this mani exist without a minimum of 18 stupid things on it? I’m starting to get suspicious, like perhaps I’ve been kidnapped and I don’t even know it. Who is doing this nail art, cuz it’s certainly not me. A facsimile of me, maybe.

Used the Lina Feeling Shapely 09 plate and I.  STINKIN’.  LOOOOOOOVE.  One of my favorite nail art-y things I’ve done.

Ok, now FOCUS.  Effort-y things are about to happen.  Because this is a galaxy-themed box, I attempted to do my very first galaxy mani.  I was nervous, y’all; there was SO MUCH sweat bead mustache on display.  Hubby had to straight up leave the room just so I could maintain a skosh of sexy and keep the divorce papers at bay.

And then I just dove right in:

I’m not saying anything magical just happened, but basically SOMETHING MAGICAL JUST HAPPENED.  I think it turned out adorable.  Get a good looksie, though, cuz the chances of ever recreating something like this again?  A crapshoot.

Oh, used the Bundle Monster BM-XL213 plate in case recreations are in order. (They might be this time!)

THE ROUND UP 

Pre-order for this box starts on October 21 at 9pm EST and will run thru October 28 at 9pm EST. Which means, you have just ONE WEEK to get your life together before the polish goes away forever. Are you properly panicked? Well, you should be.

Cost is $40 and shipping will begin November 17 or so. Click here for shopping! (Well, not right now. The 21st. As in Saturday. We’ve been over this about 17 times already.)

And now, the linky loos!  Connect with The Holo Hookup:

Instagram

Fan Group

That’s it!  Set your alarms and put Post-Its on all your surfaces.  Cuz who’s waking up on the 29th, sad and holo-less?  CERTAINLY NOT YOU.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Oct16

KBShimmer: Fall 2017 Collaboration Collection 

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Fitness app step count update: 297. Which means OFFICIALLY skinny may never come.  Ugh.  What’s a girl gotta do to lose some weight around here?  I mean, I just spent the past 7 hours straight painting and re-painting my nails, which is basically EFFORT to like the trillionth degree.  And despite the fact that 97.8465% of it was done while sitting in a chair, if body parts are moving then exercise is happening and so bonus points are coming in case you didn’t know.  Preferably a little quicker, though, cuz there’s a Full House marathon lurking, and well, the shows don’t watch themselves.  Nor gets a blog written, but that is beside the point.

Let’s talk polish! I received a ginormous swatch package from Christy with KBShimmer to share with you today.  There’s something for everyone in here, so y’all get your wallets out and your focus face on; it’s about to get suuuuper pass-out-y in about 2.5 seconds.  Lessss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

ALL OF THIS. IMMEDIATELY.

For one, I don’t know how I managed to pose in exact symmetry a mere 14 times in a row, but that collage is LEGIT.  Seriously, the overachieve-y is at an all-time high right now.  Worth half a horn toot, at least.

Secondly, OMG who’s buying these?!  Gah!  KBShimmer does it again, gettin’ us all drool-y and unattractive.  If you haven’t jumped on the bandwagon yet, this right here is a good place to start.  18,000 bottles, and in they cart they go.  Weeee!

SO.  Fall 2017 Collaboration Collection, designed in conjunction with some awesome swatchers and bloggers.  YOU NEED.  The end.

Working with another person to create a polish based on their vision, their inspiration photo, is always one of the hardest but most rewarding things we do. That moment when you know you matched what was in their head, that is the best!

— Christy Rose, KBShimmer

The first two polishes shown are a couple of Christy’s own creations; after that, it’s a blogger EXTRAVAGANZA!  Plus (and because I, too, am a dadgum professional), I typed out all the blog links for ultra carpal tunnel-like scenarios.  Soooo, you better get to clickin’ cuz it’s the right thing to do.

Here’s your as-quick-as-14,767-polishes-can-be rundown of colors.  Enjoy!

STOP AND SMELL THE ROSÉ

DESCRIPTION:  A softly pink, near copper linear holographic

OPACITY:  Three coats, but the last coat was mainly to see how deep the color would get

OH MY GOURD

DESCRIPTION:  A creamy butterscotch

OPACITY:  Two yummy coats; could easily eat my own fingers if SOCIETY wasn’t so judgy

#SQUADGHOULS

DESCRIPTION:  A deepened olive jelly filled with orange/green/gold shifting glitters

OPACITY:  Three thin coats, plus it’s GREEN so of course we lub it lots

COLLAB WITH:  Holly / Miss Holly Berries

HIGH-RISE TO THE OCCASION 

DESCRIPTION:  A light grey with violet shimmer and rainbow metallic flakies

OPACITY:  Two coats, three if you’re crazy; obviously I did three

COLLAB WITH:  Michelle / Ehmkay Nails

NORTHERN FRIGHTS

DESCRIPTION:  An emerald green/indigo purple/navy shifter filled with holo glow flakies

OPACITY:  Multichrome is happening!  I’m sorry, what is your question?

COLLAB WITH:  Judy / Beauty Judy

ESPRESSO YOURSELF

DESCRIPTION:  A rich brown filled with copper and gold holographic microglitters

OPACITY:  Two surprisingly good coats considering all that glitter; she’s lovely!

COLLAB WITH:  Gaby / LacquerLoon

BETTER LAKE THAN NEVER

DESCRIPTION:  A teal blue filled with holo glow flakies and a turquoise shimmer

OPACITY:  Two here too; smooth and dreamy

COLLAB WITH:  Alicia / Delishious Nails

I DON’T WANT NO SHRUBS

DESCRIPTION:  A hot pink polish filled with micro golden flakies and shimmer

OPACITY:  I did two, some did three, but once I sprained my own foot from stretching on the couch too hard so clearly I do things wrong sometimes

COLLAB WITH:  Jen / My Nail Polish Obsession

OLIVE OR TWIST

DESCRIPTION:  A deepened olive with holo glow flakies and golden flash

OPACITY:  Two coats.  Another GREEN.  Best day ever, in case you’re curious.

COLLAB WITH:  Mishra / Nail It Lovely

PEARLS GONE WILD

DESCRIPTION:  A silver holographic glitter with pinky red shimmer that shifts to copper and gold

OPACITY:  Two coats plus one GIANT driving hazard.  SO. MUCH. BLING.

COLLAB WITH:  Amy / McPolish / Polish Etc.

LADY AND THE VAMP

DESCRIPTION:  A plum colored Mega Flame with hints of maroon and aubergine

OPACITY:  Two coats for extra sexy scenarios!  Or sweatpant scenarios, you know, if you’re me.

COLLAB WITH:  Lisa / Cosmetic Sanctuary

PEACH FOR THE SKY

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DESCRIPTION:  A sky blue creme loaded with a peachy copper shimmer

OPACITY:  Three coats; pure happiness in a bottle

COLLAB WITH:  Antoinette / aricedotcom

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PUN-KING SPICE LATTE

6EB51F62-850D-4C71-9763-ECF1DC21AD41

DESCRIPTION:  A terracotta creme filled with subtle copper shimmer

OPACITY:  Three coats.  This one’s going on ALL the surfaces, for sure.  Mine AND yours.

COLLAB WITH:  Valesha / Peachy Polish

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LET’S FANG OUT

ED0B186A-CEE9-4750-872B-B2FD4AAB4D99

DESCRIPTION:  A plum creme with hints of maroon and aubergine

OPACITY:  Two coats; a purple so deep it looks almost black in certain lighting

COLLAB WITH:  Sam / Sam Nailed It

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THE ROUND UP

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Good news, y’all: all of these are available right now, so whatever excuse you had for not tossing a billion in the cart has been officially canceled and deleted.  Plus, this is the first collection featuring their all new 5-Free polish base, so if you’re not properly convinced at this point, I feel var var sad about your brain.  The deets:

Full collection retails for $120; single bottles are $9.25 each.  

Where to buy: http://www.kbshimmer.com

Stockists for international customers:  Harlow & Co (Canada) and Color4Nails (the rest of the world)

And now, more linky loos!  Connect with KBShimmer:

Instagram

Facebook

Fan Group

As always, thank you so much for reading all the way to the bottom. If it wasn’t for you, I’d just be in here talking to myself like a crazy person.  Or a crazy-ER person.  Either way.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Oct14

Seventy Seven Nail Lacquer: Fall Quartet 2017

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In true ME fashion, I meant to get this blog up yesterday but I downloaded about 27 games onto my iPad last night and then didn’t move off the couch for all eternity.  Seriously, about that wasting-time thing:  LEVEL EXPERT.  But the black hole that is putting benches and fountains in your fake garden is legit no joke FOR REAL.  I did one little thing and normal brain function = OUT THE FREAKING WINDOW.  Next thing, it’s 5 in the morning and I’m buying paving stones and floating lily pads with my eyes closed.  In my defense, though, I’m suuuuuuper good at imaginary gardening.

CLEARLY, I am the saddest person in the world.

Soooo, let’s get to the polish before more stupid things come out.  I received a lovely quad of pretties from Connie with Seventy Seven Nail Lacquer to show you today.  In case you’re sitting around wearing sweatpants and doing a whooooole lotta nothing, spending some money sounds like your most logical next step.  Look at what you’re buying:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

I see holo! I see glitter! I see jaws are dropping, everywhere.  

So this is the new Fall Quartet, four gorgeous shades full of yummy deliciousness that you’re gonna need at least 18,000 times over.  COMPLETE RATIONAL BEHAVIOR, though, in case you’re curious.

It doesn’t say anywhere that this quad is inspired by The Golden Girls, buuuuuut they share names with The Golden Girls and since I’m pretty much an expert in re-runs of tv shows from the 1980s, wellll, there’s a math equation in there somewhere if you’re so inclined.  Either way, though, it’s a lovely quad and a bonafide justification situation to like the trillionth degree. 

Here’s your quick rundown of colors.  Grab the smelling salts and prepare for extra ladylike scenarios! Drool is happening in 3 .. 2 .. 1 ..

BEA

DESCRIPTION:  A black with various silver holo glitters

Bea Arthur played Dorothy Zbornak in The Golden Girls, and this polish reminds me of her salt-n-pepper hair.  And I don’t know if I just invented a brand new marketing strategy or what, but if you want this polish EVEN MORE NOW well then you are welcome.

OMG, I am soooo good at blogging you guys! 

BETTY

DESCRIPTION:  A pink with gold and pink shimmer

Betty White played the character, Rose Nylund – and this color is the perfect representation for her.  Cuz her name is Rose and roses are pink sometimes.

Y’ALL.  I’m not saying I’m a rocket scientist, but I’m probably a rocket scientist.

ESTELLE

DESCRIPTION:  A linear holographic in a sheer silver base with silver holo glitter, fuchsia sparks and iridescent glitter

Estelle Getty played Sophia Petrillo, the oldest of the group.  She was a feisty little mama with comebacks and attitude, and so naturally this polish gotta be IN YO FACE.  Seriously, it’s a dire case of the grabby fingers with this one.

RUE

DESCRIPTION:  A plum holographic with copper sparks

Rue McClanahan played the role of Blanche Devereaux, a flirtatious, sexy southern belle.  This polish is a glorious representation.  It’s basically my spirit polish, as y’all know where there is sexy there is me wearing an extraordinary amount of robe with one hand in a Cheetos bag.

THE ROUND UP 

Annnnnnnd we’ve officially passed the hell on out now.  Good lordt, they’s pretty.

For all my swatches, I did three coats for no dadgum good reason.  Cuz two coats was perfectly fine.  But this is what happens when you swatch at 2am on a work night:  the brain done goes away somewhere, I swear it.

The Fall Quartet is already up for pre-order right now thru October 20 at 11:59pm PST.  In case you don’t math well, that’s like 7 days to organize your life. Seventy Seven up top, people!  Here’s your deets:

Cost for the full four piece set $44

Single bottles retail for $11.99

Where to buy:  http://www.seventysevennaillacquer.com

Now, these will still be available after the pre-order, but quantities will be limited. Although, who’s in the mood to take risky chances with their nail polish?  CERTAINLY NOT YOU. In fact, you’re first in line. Go go go!

The linky loos!  Connect with Seventy Seven:

Instagram

Facebook

Fan Group

I have a huuuuuge swatch day ahead of me, so I best get to it.  I’m determined to keep the iPad away, lest more fake gardening (and accidental real divorce) happens.  BEST BLOGGER EVER?  I say yes.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Oct12

Oogie’s Boys Trio: Illyrian Polish + Octopus Party + Crows Toes 

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I’ve locked myself in this bedroom in an effort to keep the distractions away, but the cat just laid down next to me for no reason whatsoever, so how this blog is getting written now we’ll NEVER freaking know.

I’m trying very hard to ignore it, cuz as soon as I show too much emotion, whatever this is is over in about 2.5 seconds.  He’s very finicky with his love, even though I massage him and scratch his tummy and kiss him right on the mouth as ALL CATS EXPECT AND ENJOY.  Cuz who doesn’t want to be dressed in a tiny tuxedo and carried around like a baby from room to room?  I mean, I’d pretty much do anything if someone’s offering to do my walking for me.  You think I’m exaggerating, but I legit lived across the street from one of my jobs and still drove myself to work every morning.

Who’s officially the laziest person in allll the land?  I’m not even gonna tell you cuz you already know.

Ohhhhh, but the polish!  Do I have some beauties to share with you today!  There’s flecks, there’s sparks, there’s a thousand drool buckets on standby.  Take a look at what you’re buying:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Now, SWOON!  Seriously, if you’ve come for the ladylike composure, well you’ve picked a very bad day.  It’s soooo noodle leg-y in here already!

This is the Oogie’s Boys Trio, a collaboration between Illyrian Polish, Octopus Party Nail Lacquer and Crows Toes.  Ummm, three awesome brands, three gorgeous polishes, available all with the click of ONE tiny button?  Is Leonardo happening next, cuz BEST DAY EVER is clearly in full effect.

This trio is inspired by the movie, The Nightmare Before Christmas, and apparently Oogie’s boys – Lock, Shock and Barrel – feed Oogie by sending bugs to him down a metal chute.  Sooooo, kinda like my house where sandwiches just appear out of nowhere.  Being married to a chef comes highly recommended, just so you know.

Enough chatty.  Time for nail polish! Here’s your quick rundown of the goodies:

ILLYRIAN POLISH:  LOCK

DESCRIPTION:  A dirty oxblood/copper with holographic sparkle and small copper/red flecks

OPACITY:  Two amazing coats

OCTOPUS PARTY NAIL LACQUER:  SHOCK

DESCRIPTION:  A charcoal mauve holographic with gold flakies, purple/indigo shifting pigment and iridescent purple glitter

OPACITY:  Two coats again! Magic!

CROWS TOES:  BARREL


DESCRIPTION:  A deep, dank, murky green topped with blue, green and purple sparks

OPACITY:  Yep, still two coats.  Your best day just got best-i-er.

THE ROUND UP 

Want, want and NEED.  That’s your new motto.  Wallets are flying out of purses everywhere, I can already tell.

TIME TO FOCUS.  There’s a Polish Emergency in our midst.  Cuz the Oogie’s Boys Trio is on pre-order for FIVE DAYS ONLY, and if y’all got some hives cream handy, I’ll take a thousand.  And if you’re not properly panicked at this point, we need to have a talk about your brain.

Cost for this trio is $32 and is available in each maker’s store.  You also have the option to purchase individual bottles, although WHY?! is the actual question.  All three, in the cart stat.  However, just in case you choose groceries and electricity (and other adult-like responsibilities), then it’s $12 each for Illyrian and Crows Toes and $13 for Octopus Party.

Where to buy:

Illyrian Polish http://www.illyrianpolish.com

Octopus Party Nail Lacquer http://www.octopuspartynl.com

Crows Toes http://crowstoesnailcolor.bigcartel.com

Now go get your pretties!  You have until October 17 at 10pm EST and there’s NO WAY you’re missing out on this.  Cuz who’s waking up on October 18, sad and trio-less?  CERTAINLY NOT YOU.

More clicking opportunities!  Connect with EVERYONE:

Illyrian Polish:  Instagram ▪️ Facebook ▪️ Fan Group 

Octopus Party Nail Lacquer:  Instagram ▪️ Facebook ▪️ Fan Group

Crows Toes:  Instagram ▪️ Facebook ▪️ Fan Group

SO. MUCH. EFFORT.  Y’all better be clicking on those links.  Cuz after all this carpal tunneling, it’s the least you can do.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Oct10

Alchemy Lacquers: Chocolate Bar Collection 

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A cat hair just flew into my wet fingernail so now this day has officially been cancelled and deleted. Ugh.  Whyyyyyy, Universe, why?  Apparently, someone out there thinks I have nothing more to do than paint nails for nigh on eternity.  Except who’s watching the TV then?  Eating the Cheetos?  Dangling the robe strings in front of the cat for like two hours straight?

In other words, I’m var var busy.  The fact this blog is getting written is a damn near miracle.  Worth half a horn toot, at least.

In an attempt to go to bed before 3am, let’s do a speed blog!  I have a most gorgeous collection of polishes from Alchemy Lacquers to share with you today.  Check out what Rebecca made:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Look at all those pretty sausages! Every single one of them: beauties.  I don’t know what you got planned later, but tossing a bunch of polish in your shopping cart sounds about right.  You’re about to spend some money, y’all, just so you know.

So this is the Chocolate Bar Collection, a set of 6 little dreamboats full of sparkle and shimmer and general deliciousness. GUYS, you want these.  I’m serious.  I can’t think of one acceptable reason why not.  Unless you don’t like pretty things.  Or perhaps you are a robot.  But other than that, NOTHING.

Get your wallets handy, cuz here’s your quick rundown of colors: 

STRAWBERRY ECLAIR 

DESCRIPTION:  A pink flake that contains pink metallic and holographic glitter, purple/pink/orange shifting flakies and a touch of holographic sparkle

OPACITY:  Three ultra smooth coats

Rebecca said this one is intentionally made sheer and you might consider putting it over a dark base; HOWEVER, that’s a whooooole nother level of effort, so here’s what it looks like on naked nails instead.  PERFECTION, basically.

SALTED CARAMEL 

DESCRIPTION:  A gold/brown to green shifting holographic with specks of coral-orange/gold/green/blue multichrome flakies

OPACITY:  Two lovely coats

For real, my jaw is just laying on the floor like NO BIG DEAL.  

BLACK FOREST TRUFFLE 

DESCRIPTION:  A mauve creme with turquoise/blue shifting shimmer and holographic finish

OPACITY:  Two luscious coats

Purple lovers, you seeing this?!  GAH!  It’s getting suuuuuper swoon-y in here!  Hope ya’ll got your fainting couches handy, like one of those fancy Victorian ones, cuz who’s about to get unattractive on a futon?  NOT THIS LADY.

CHERRY CORDIAL 

DESCRIPTION:  A dark red jelly with red/orange/gold/green shifting shimmer

OPACITY:  Two dreamy coats

Ahhh, now. We’re in love with this one aren’t we? She’s the red of your dreams:  sexy and sassy, flirty but also kinda bossy. She’s who you wish you were back in 5th grade when you tried out for cheerleading but refused to show school spirit, cuz duh, EMBARRASSING. For real, it was all kinds of uncomfortable crickets in there. Those judges … being so judgy. It’s as if they knew there was a spelling bee nearby missing a 10-year-old.

MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP

DESCRIPTION:  A milk coffee creme with turquoise/pink/purple shifting shimmer and holographic finish

OPACITY:  Three dainty coats

Normally, I don’t love me some nudes, but this one has just enough darkness in it to look flattering against my see-thru skin.  And that contrasting shimmer?  Ugh.  So pretty.  Even the Queen of England’s got a dire case of the Grabby Fingers.  GIMME.

AMARETTO 

DESCRIPTION:  A cool dark grey creme with magenta/red/orange/gold/lime green shimmer

OPACITY:  Two gorgoeus coats 

And now we end this thing on a billion exclamation points.  This one is truly gorgeous and a legit driving hazard.  Cuz while the shimmer is a little more subdued in regular lighting, under the sun there’s an insane amount of sparkle.  Plus potholes.  Lots and lots of potholes.

THE ROUND UP 

ALL OF IT.  IMMEDIATELY.

The Chocolate Bar collection is available now, so guess what you’re doing in about 2.5 seconds?  Seriously, I’m not saying it’s a Polish Emergency, but it’s probably a Polish Emergency.  Go, go, go!  Cuz who’s missing out on all his chocolately goodness.  CERTAINLY NOT YOU.  Some deets:

Mint Chocolate Chip and Strawberry Eclair – $9.00 each

Salted Caramel and Black Forest Truffle – $10.00 each

Cherry Cordial and Amaretto – $11.00 each

Comes with a side of Leonardo.  Or else I just dreamed that.  I dunno.

Where to buy:  http://www.alchemylacquers.com

Shop closes at midnight EST 10/11 (or technically 10/12) so be sure to get your orders in TODAY. As in, RIGHT NOW. As in, NO TIME FOR LOUNGING.  The shop will only be down briefly and the polishes will be back, but that is beside the point. 

And now, the linky loos!  Connect with Alchemy Lacquers:

Instagram

Facebook

Fan Group

Headed to do a couple more swatches before bed which will most likely end up a 17 hour polish party. And then naps at the desk for me tomorrow! HR loves that, I swear.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Oct9

Pretty Beautiful Unlimited: Sugar Skulls Collection (partial)

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We’re jumping straight into the polish, guys, cuz all I’ve gotten accomplished today was a handful of swatches and epic Olympic-style time wasting.  Which surprisingly doesn’t get a blog written, not even a little bit.  So I’ve effectively ruined the streak I had going and now I’m behind, and basically if you have a tube of hives cream handy, I’ll take a thousand.  Ugh.  Responsibilities.

Now, FOCUS.  

The lovely Miss Virginia from Pretty Beautiful Unlimited sent me 6 out of 12 colors from the new Sugar Skulls collection to share with you today, and if you’re in the mood for an all out glitter EXTRAVAGANZA!, well then you’re about to have a var var good day.  Lookie:

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Told ya.  How festive and fun and Halloween-y are these?  And headed for the shopping cart, just so you know.

Okay, a zero chatty quick rundown of the colors.  It’ll be hard to just give you a description and show you pictures and then move on to the next one like I ain’t a big drool-y mess and this is all NO BIG DEAL. Cuz it IS a big deal to the trillionth degree, let me assure you. But we don’t have 18 years to just hang out in here reading things today, so onto the polish we go.  Weeee!

In other words, I’m sorry.  As soon as someone takes the couch away, everything goes back to normal.

FESTIVAL NIGHTS 

DESCRIPTION:  A white crelly with silver, purple, turquoise, black, lime and pink glitters with indigo/purple/red/orange shimmer

OPACITY:  Two coats, which is amazing for a white crelly.  Nice, smooth application which is AMAZING-ER.  Virginia’s got this thing on lock!

LA MUERTE

DESCRIPTION:  A bold lavender jelly with two types of chrome flakies, gold, silver and chameleon glitters and red/purple/blue shimmer

OPACITY:  Two dreamy coats, although you might do a billion on accident.  CAN’T.  STOP.  POLISHING.  You purple lovers agree.

DANCING SKELETONS

DESCRIPTION:  A dark grey crelly with gunmetal, black, silver, white and pink glitters

OPACITY:  Another two coater!  What is this voodoo magic?

FLOWER OF THE DEAD

DESCRIPTION:  A burnt orange crelly with red/violet/blue shimmer, illusion flakes and green, copper, red, gold and chameleon microglitters

OPACITY:  Blah blah blah.  You already know.

Side note:  THIS COLOR!  One of the prettiest ugly colors you’ll ever see.  I want this one on all the surfaces.  Mine AND yours.  COMPLETE RATIONAL BEHAVIOR, in case you’re curious.

DAY OF THE DEAD

DESCRIPTION:  A white crelly packed with gold, green, brown, garnet and red glitters and copper shimmer

OPACITY:  Two coats, cuz this miracle is neverending.  Perfect crelly formula too.  If you’ve been looking for a non-gloopy white, well then it’s 18,000 bottles for you.

Kinda pulls a little off white on me, but I think it’s the copper shimmer giving us a brain malfunction.  Cuz COPPER, y’all.  Also known as THE DAY WE ALL GOT A LITTLE MORE UNATTRACTIVE.  I mean, there’s only so much sexy to go around while the tongue is lolling about outside the body.

MOJITO LIMES

DESCRIPTION:  A green jelly packed with green/gold/red shimmer, chameleon microglitters and chrome flakies

OPACITY:  Two smooth and lovely coats.  And it’s GREEN.  Gah!  Excuse me while I pass on out for a second.

Check out that shimmer:

THE ROUND UP 

You done died.  You did.

The Sugar Skulls Collection is available now, so you’re all set for shopping!  In addition to these 6 polishes, there are 6 more to toss in the cart.  NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR LOUNGING.  Go buy yourself some nail polish cuz it’s your most logical next step.  Here’s all the deets:

Entire 12-piece set retails for $95

If you gotta go single bottles, price is $9.50 each for Mojito Limes and La Muerte and $9 each for the rest I’ve swatched here.  For the other 6 polishes, check the website for info.  I’d do it for you, but SUDDENLY! I’ve ran out of efforts.  As one tends to do while blogging at 2am.

Where to buy:  http://www.prettybeautifulunlimited.com

Finally, the linky loos!  Connect with Pretty Beautiful Unlimited:

Instagram

Facebook

Fan Group

Alright gang, that’s it!  Go get your pretties. Then sit back, relax and stalk your mailman like a proper loon.

Later, loves!

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Oct7

Fair Maiden Polish: Polish Pickup October 2017

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Oh, just sitting here with the cat at 2 in the morning eating Doritos cuz CLEARLY we know how to party. Seriously guys, first Spelling Bee Champion of 1987 and now THIS. Why I’m not married to Leonardo DiCaprio at this point defies alllll the comprehensions.

So, seeing as the Polish Pickup is practically over, I figure now’s a good time to write a blog about it. Best blogger ever, y’all! Never forget. Ugh. However, I’m gonna try to make this review short and sweet in an effort to be somewhat professional. And then spend the next 17 paragraphs discussing how I’m gonna make a review short and sweet, thereby defeating the purpose about ONE BILLION PERCENT. Again, BEST BLOGGER EVER, just so we’re clear.

Let’s move on, shall we? You know, before more stupid things come out. I have the Fair Maiden Polish contribution to the Polish Pickup to show you, and I swear y’all are about to get suuuuper unattractive in about 2.5 seconds. Cuz there’s shimmer and flakies and noodle legs GALORE! Take a look:

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Welp, let’s go ahead and get the smiling like an idiot part out of the way first, then. Perhaps y’all need to go off by yourself for a second, lest someone walk in on you while you’ve got your eyes closed, looking stupid.

Once again, the theme for October is Monsters & Mythical Creatures, and Sarah and Adrienne were inspired by the movie of my childhood, The NeverEnding Story. Seriously, I wanted to be that Empress. She was beautiful and angelic and the complete opposite of 9-year-old me with a face full of eyeglasses.

Here’s the pic:

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Now here’s the polish:

LUCK DRAGON

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Basically twins! But did we expect anything less from the Fair Maiden ladies? NO WE DID NOT.

DESCRIPTION: A white crelly with intense blue shifting shimmer that hints at violet and red in certain lights; finished with purple/blue multichrome flakies and a dusting of scattered holo sparkle throughout

OPACITY: Three coats, but two was pretty good

GUYS. This is one of the prettiest polishes you’ll ever lay your eyes on. It literally just glows on the nail. An eye-catcher, a dream-come-true-er. You’re gonna need like 27 bottles, but then again, you already know.

More pics, for extra convincing:

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Gah! The flakies got me, guys. They got me good.

The Polish Pickup sale is open NOW and will stay open all the way thru Monday, October 9. Cost varies between makers, but Fair Maiden’s polish retails for $11. Shipping is a flat $3 no matter how much you buy. However, I recommend all of them because no one does Crazy Nail Lady quite like you. Get on it, boo boos!

For more information on the sale and how it works, click here for the FAQs. Cuz I’ve blogged like 7,397 days in a row and the carpal tunnel is so dire.

Now click here for shopping. I mean, what else is more important for you to do today? (NOTHING, in case you’re curious.)

Later, loves!

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Oct6

BLUSH Lacquers: Polish Pickup October 2017

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Vacation is over and everything is back to normal cuz it’s 2am on a work night and obviously it’s TIME TO WRITE A BLOG!

Now fast forward approximately 22 hours later, and the second sentence of this blog has officially been born.  Sooooo … if you’re interested in wasting a whooooooole lotta time, I got tips and pointers complete with 17 charts and graphs and maybe an Excel spreadsheet, to be safe.  Cuz you don’t get to Lazy, Level EXPERT by doing things in a timely manner.  Ugh.  Seriously, someone needs to come save me from me.

And now SUDDENLY! the Polish Pickup has already started and OMG, THE HIVES ARE LURKING! I’ve only got 2 polishes left to blog, so this is some kinda IDEAL SCENARIO if you ask me.  

In other words, let’s get the hell on with it before the things are no longer the things.  Take a look at what Victoria with BLUSH Lacquers has made for us this month:

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Well, now that’s just stupid pretty, is it not?  Gah!  I’m not even gonna pretend normal things are happening over here.  Cuz someone just tossed in a bunch of shifty business and I’m basically a big ole puddle of goo.  Plus drool.  And 27 other ladylike-type scenarios.  OMG, am I still married cuz seriously I don’t even know.

As mentioned in my previous post, this month’s Polish Pickup theme is Monsters & Mythical Creatures. Victoria was inspired by a Percy Jackson version of a hippocampus. Check it out:

So then naturally, she made us something beautiful. It’s legit time to toss all composure out the freaking window, just so you know. 

NOT YOUR AVERAGE SEAHORSE

DESCRIPTION: A navy based polish with a shifting orange-gold-green micro flake shimmer, shifting green-blue-purple-pink flakies and a light touch of scattered holo

OPACITY:  Two coats, three if you’re crazy; obviously, I did three

Gah! I just love how those glittery things catch the light. Distracting, to say the least. Cuz you forgot you were reading this blog, didn’t you? Cuz I forgot I was even writing it.

Seriously, this polish is nothing short of STUNNING. Victoria always makes us such pretty things, but if we must choose favorites, this one is definitely at the top.  Formula is magical perfection.  And the Ugly Ecstasy Face is a dire thing.

More proof below!

Who’s still upright?  Not a dadgum one of us, that’s who.  I know y’all have 50-ish polish and polish-related things to choose from this month, but if this beauty isn’t somehow in your shopping cart, well then CLEARLY you are wrong.

So about this Polish Pickup thing, I’ll give you a brief rundown of talking points:

WHAT:  A crap-ton of indie brands all coming together for a one-stop shop event; you buy one or all, it’s up to you! Flat $3 shipping no matter what. 

WHEN:  Right now thru all day Monday, October 9

WHERE:  http://www.PolishPickup.com

If you’d rather read the more eloquent version, click here for the FAQs from the PPU website.

The prices vary from brand to brand, but BLUSH Lacquers’ retails for $11.75.  But happiness is priceless so that point is moot.

To join in the fun of future Polish Pickup theme nominations, voting and sneak peeks, click here for the Facebook fan group. DO IT. I’m serious.

To be continued, loves! One more PPU to go!

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Oct5

Nail Hoot: Polish Pickup October 2017

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I was 2.5 seconds away from buying my cat a unicorn horn hat souvenir but thankfully George Lopez walked down the hotel lobby and I got properly distracted by FAMOUS PEOPLE! for the next couple hours.  Hubby gave me the secret eye signal, you know, the one that says SIMMER DOWN, CRAZY without drawing attention to the fact that someone is clearly not simmering down.  Seriously though, hubby just needs to look away from time to time cuz when someone famous is nearby, I am the best dadgum lurker that EVER freaking lurked.  But FOR SOME REASON, that’s not a very attractive quality.  Ugh.  Hubby is ZERO fun sometimes.  Good thing I’m such a Trophy Wife or we’d all be worried.

So while I sit here behaving all sorts of stalker-y, let’s get to the point. The October Polish Pickup is just around the corner, and I know y’all just dying to get out your grabby fingers. There’s about 50-ish brands participating this month with some pretty amazing polish and polish-related things, so if there was ever a time to get off your no-buys, right now would be it. It’s a bye bye checkbook type situation for you, in case you didn’t know.

Here’s the gorgeous contribution from Brandie with Nail Hoot:

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Drool-y Scenario #6534589, and we all got our buckets on standby.  It’s about to get suuuuuper unattactive in here, I can already tell.

The theme for the month of October is Monsters & Mythical Creatures, and Brandie chose this awesome picture as her inspiration.  Take a look at this:

Now look at this:

SKYWARD GRYPHON 

Basically, NAILED IT isn’t even close.  A whoooooole lotta jaw dropping, though?  Welllll, that’s better.

DESCRIPTION: A stunning, dark golden linear holo with medium red flash throughout

OPACITY:  Two luscious coats plus glossy top coat

This color is so comfy cozy brown-y gold, but those glittery bits?  UGH. I gots the noodle legs y’all and the Ugly Ecstasy Face is in full effect. I’m a walking pile of sex, just so you know.

More shots, but not for licking:

Even though you want to! But the judgy eyes, they are everywhere.

So in case you are new, this is how this thing works. The Polish Pickup shop goes live on Friday, October 6 at 11am EST. At approximately 11am and 1 second, you’re tossing nail polish in your shopping cart like a dadgum crazy person. Plus 27 backup bottles for SAFETY. Then get back into pajamas cuz you’ve had a hard day.

In case you’re unable to prioritize properly, the shop will stay open until Monday, October 9 at 11:59pm EST. After that, every last one of these polishes: GONE. Forever. As in POLISH EMERGENCY! so be sure to get your life in order or else it’s a sad state of affairs for you.

Prices for the polishes are all different; Skyward Gryphon in particular will retail at $9.75.  Shipping is a flat rate of $3 no matter if you buy one polish or if you buy all of them. I don’t do the maths too well, but I’m thinking that’s a pretty good deal.  Also, you can make multiple orders over the course of the weekend, and the lovely PPU ladies will combine your shipping.  Who’s royalty then? That be YOU.

To get in on sneak peeks and future voting for monthly themes, click here to the join the Polish Pickup Facebook group. Then when October 6 rolls around, click here for shopping! DO EEEEEET. I mean it.

More PPUs are coming, so be sure to stick around.  Later, loves!

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Oct4

Different Dimension: Be Nice or Leaf + Creepin’ It Real Trios

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Current status: sitting in a pedicure chair taking care of business, one eye sleeping but still blogging like a DADGUM PROFESSIONAL.  Seriously guys, I earned those Gucci flats, in case you’re curious. Even if hubby did say I have to wear them everyday for the rest of my life.  Although if he’s thinking that’s some sort of punishment, CLEARLY he doesn’t know me very well.  Cuz before there was a nail polish problem there was a shoe problem, and once it is in you, IT IS IN YOU.  Allll the designer shoes: GIMME.

Okay, before a full-on snoring nap sesh happens in front of strangers, let’s look at polish.  Missi with Different Dimension has sent over so many pretties to share with you today!  Actually, I’m splitting things into two, maybe three blogs just to ensure y’all READ ALL THE WAY TO THE BOTTOM and I figure shorter blogs are more ideal.  Cuz although I can sit around and read things-slash-lounge about-slash-do freaking nothing for nigh on eternity, I’m quite certain everyone else in the world has more exciting shit to do.  Blah.  You and your fancy life.

But yeah.  Nail polish.  Lessss go!  First up is the adorable Be Nice or Leaf trio:

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Want, want and need! That’s your new motto.  There’s just something about some glossy cremes in PERFECT seasonal colors that’ll give you a dire case of the Grabby Fingers.  Cuz while I do not particularly love fall – solely due to it’s unfortunate proximity to the hell that is winter – but anytime you toss in a bunch of pretty polishes that resemble the changing colors of leaves, welllllll … I’ll take a thousand.

Rational behavior?  NOT TODAY!

Swatches below show two coats plus a glossy top coat.  Nice formulas, applied evenly and easily.  Take a look at what you get:

WHAT A RE-LEAF

DESCRIPTION:  A berry red creme

DON’T LEAF ME THIS WAY

DESCRIPTION:  A butterscotch yellow creme

I BELEAF IN YOU

DESCRIPTION:  An olive green creme

Gah! Are those not glorious?  A trio of dreamboats?  Headed for the shopping cart?  If the answer isn’t YES, I am var var concerned about the state of your brain.

Plus they also stamp and watermarble!  I mean, I have nothing to show you cuz I don’t plan things very well, but that is beside the point.  Best Blogger Ever is what you’re thinking.

In addition to the cremes, there’s another festive trio headed your way.  Some Halloween fun courtesy of the Creepin’ It Real trio.  Check out more things you are buying!  

I see glitter! I see holo! I see wallets just flying out of purses everywhere!

Here’s the rundown:

BASIC WITCH

DESCRIPTION:  A black holographic with silver flakies and holographic microflakies

BOO FELICIA

DESCRIPTION:  An orange holographic with silver flakies and holographic microflakies

HERE FOR THE BOOS

DESCRIPTION:  A holographic base filled with fine orange and black glitters

For these swatches, I did two coats each and had no formula issues whatsoever. Even Here For the Boos was quite impressive by its opacity considering the base has no color.  I did add a tiny bit of a third coat to that one just to ensure no naked spots, but it was barely a third. However, if your nails are longer, maybe three coats would work best for you.  Either way though, we lub it lots.

These polishes are available individually, but if you buy the trio you get one of these:

CUTICLE OIL PEN

Whaaaaat?! CANDY CORN CUTICLE OIL?!  I swear, if you’re turning your back on this now, there’s a karate chop with your name on it. 

The candy corn scent is very nice. Sweet, but not over the top. I really liked it! And the brush applicator is super soft and fine enough to get down in the cuticles without causing disaster.You definitely want this. TRUST ME, you do. 

THE ROUND UP 

Two trios for extra drool-y scenarios!   Do you see how much you’re buying these?  In fact, you’re first in line. (Right? RIGHT.)

All the shopping deets:

The Be Nice or Leaf Trio retails for $25 and is only available as a set. 

The Creepin’ It Real Trio retails for $30 and includes the Candy Corn cuticle oil pen. If ya gotta go single bottles, they’re $12 each but sadly no pen.  In other words, you’re getting the trio. I HAVE DECIDED FOR YOU.

Everything is available now, so no waiting necessary. Y’all get busy!  You were just sitting around in sweatpants doing nothing anyway. 

Where to buy:  http://differentdimensionpolish.bigcartel.com/

And now the linky loos! Connect with Different Dimension:

Instagram 

Facebook 

Fan Group

More blogs are coming later cuz this train keeps moving whether we want it to or not. Stay tuned!

Later, loves!

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