Okay.  It’s time to get serious.  MDJ Creations has a huge release of new colors and restocks coming your way today, and if someone can find a way to stop time real fast, I’ll write a proper blog for you.  Anyone? … Anyone?  Blah.  Looks like Science wins again.  Booooo.

Sorry guys.  Why hubby won’t let me stay home and paint nails for a living defies allllll the comprehensions.  I mean, for a Trophy Wife, the amount of effort being made over here is quite surprising to say the least.  MORE ROBE, is what I mean.  And Starbucks, if y’all not busy.

So until that little dream scenario kicks in, I suppose we’ll just sit here on my lunch break and do some writing stuff instead of the napping stuff I’d rather do.  Best blogger ever then?  I say YES.

Okay, no more chatty; I’m basically wasting time at this point.  Gonna keep this as short and sweet as possible so I can get you to the shop link at the bottom BEFORE THE ENTIRE STORE SELLS OUT. Are you panicked?  Well, you should be. Lesss go! 

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Quick!  Lick the screen while no one’s looking.  Now act natural.

Good job.

If you belong to the MDJ Peeps group on Facebook, you’ll know the new A Time & A Season collection is the result of some inspiration photos based on the four seasons.  We all voted on our favorites, and then Melissa gave them life. They turned out BEAUTIFUL!  Here’s proof:

Renew, the inspiration for Spring:

This one has a soft sheer pink jelly base with purple to blue iridescent flakies, holographic microglitter and iridescent microglitter.  Commence the jaw dropping!

Sustain, the inspiration for Summer:

This one has a rosy pink sheer jelly base with blue, purple and yellow holographic microglitters and iridescent flakies.  The color pulled a bit purple on me, especially under the lamps. But either way, though, we lub it lots!

Transform, the inspiration for Autumn:

This one has a dusty blue sheer jelly base with copper, blue and orange holographic microglitters and green iridescent flakies.  It’s my faaaaaavorite!  An ocean of lovely. A dadgum flakie EXTRAVAGANZA!

Reflect, the inspiration for Winter:

This one has a nude sheer jelly base with blue and golden yellow holographic microglitters and blue to green iridescent flakies.  Normally I’m not one for neutral-type shades like this. But throw a bunch of iridescence in it, and it’s a Grabby Fingers epidemic like nobody’s business. 

Each one of these polishes took 3 thin coats for opacity, although the nude one still showed a bit of nail line.  However, it’s the sheer quality that sets off all the goodies, and for THAT!, Melissa gets a horn toot. And maybe some jazz hands cuz it’s Friday.

Aside from all that, they also glow in the dark which I was completely unaware of until I went to bed after swatching. Scared the crap out of me, like whose are those?!?! Basically, five tiny serial killers come to get me, that’s who. 

The other new collection is this fantastical explosion of glitter called Fun in the Sun.  There are four neon glitter toppers and two pretty crellies, absolutely PERFECT for summer.  Want, want and NEED. That’s your new motto.

Well, if that doesn’t do you in, I’m pretty sure you’re a robot.  Glitter glitter everywhere, and in the cart they go!

Let’s do the two crellies first.  Here is Let the Games Begin:

I don’t have official descriptions on these, so unfortunately we’re gonna make something up and hope nothing stupid comes out. I’d say it’s a pink … yes, pink, very good … and some neon pink, orange and yellow glitter with a lovely dash of holo.

Or thereabouts. 

Formula on this one was thicker and the glitter payout was like JACKPOT PARTY!, but it managed just fine with two regular coats.

Now here’s Drinks With Umbrellas:

I’d say this one is an orchid pink-y purple with bright neon glitters in sky blue and lilac and lime and whatnot. Holo too.

OMG, I’m sooooo good at this you guys!

Blah. 

Formula on this one was thinner and easier to apply. Still a good glitter load. It’s my favorite of the two. 

As for the four toppers, I applied them all over a black base so you can properly see all the shimmers and glitters and holos you’re getting, although they would look spectacular over a coordinating color.  Of which I have none to show you.  Cuz someone is a PROFESSIONAL, that’s why. Ugh. 

First up is Under Water:

Again, no official descriptions but I see aqua shimmer and that’s all you need to know, really. Also: you’re buying it. 

Next up is Water Balloons:

This one has the least amount of glitter payout, although I quite like how they’re all spread out like that. No sense in getting elbow jabby, I always say. 

Now here’s Pool Party:

Kinda the same as Water Balloons but with slightly more glitter and in a peachy orange scheme.

Ummmm, what else? Seriously, winging this on my own is a terribly horrible idea. SEND HELP. And Leonardo, just in case. 

Lastly, here’s On Vacation:

A cooler toned palette of glitter for this one. Similar to Water Balloons but no orange or yellow. This would look amazing over a pastel blue or purple mani. Or even a green one!  You know, for extra drool-y scenarios. 

Each one of these was one layer over the base, and it looks pretty good. However,  I did do a tiny bit of manual glitter placement cuz OCD is the devil. 

And now for the bonuses!  Melissa has two single shades coming out as well – one is a new limited edition – or POLISH EMERGENCY, clearly – and the other is a restock.  So because time is dire, let’s do the limited edition first.  Here’s Totally Free:

A sheer white crelly here, but loaded with tons of pretty shimmer and fresh, crisp springy glitters. Blue, purple, lime green, peach. Squares and bars and hexes.  That’s a lot of goodies! How this one doesn’t cost like a billion dollars is beyond me. 

I did three thin coats and it was still kinda sheer, but not so much where I felt I needed to keep adding layers. I mean, you don’t get to Lazy, Level EXPERT by going the extra mile. 

And now for the restock of Hot Mama:

I don’t know if this is just meant to be a topper or not, but I went ham with three coats on naked nails and got the most sparkliest mani of all time!

This one has a clear base with tons of silver goodness and pink and magenta holographic glitters, some blue stuff, and tiny bars. Probably magic and voodoo too, but who’s to say for sure? I mean, I just described this as having “blue stuff” in it, and basically that’s not even a thing.

Did this post just spiral all to hell?  I’m about 23% sure of it. 

The round up:

DONE! You just got 18 years of blog post wrapped up in one tiny lunch hour. Is there an award coming, or … ?  Cuz the carpal tunnel situation is legit no joke. 

Okay gang, get your shopping hands ready.  Everything is live in 10 minutes (or June 23 at 5pm CST if you wanna get specific.)  Don’t miss out!  Seriously. I MEAN IT. 

Click here for shopping!

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Today’s post is a big one.  Not sure what you had planned for the day, but calling in sick might make the most sense.  Cuz you ain’t getting out of this blog without at least a carpal tunnel-type situation.  But also your brain may stop holding your mouth closed, and lolling tongues amongst co-workers is usually some sort of HR violation.  Drool buckets = NOT APPROVED.  And judgy eyes are everywhere.  Blah.

By the time you finish all this, you might’ve died about 18 times from all the pretty, anyway, so staying home seems appropriate.  Impromptu vacation for you then!  Pajamas for everyone!  Also, best blogger ever (with her impeccable timing).  Toot toot!

Let’s get this drool party started!  I have loads of polishes from MDJ Creations that have recently been restocked.  Since this is somewhat kinda an emergency – one shade has already sold out since I started writing (as y’all know it takes me like 18 years to get the dang thing written) – we’re gonna get right into the polish with very little chit chat.  Cuz if I waste too much time, it’s a sad state of affairs for all of us.  Engage:  Shopping Hand.  Now lessss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

First up is Hope Begins:

This one has been around for a while, but now she’s back and still so lovely.  Holo holo everywhere, and in the cart she goes!  Cuz her’s a pretty lady, that’s why.

Aside from all that, this polish is a charity one, and 100% of the proceeds go to benefit Naomi’s Village, an orphanage in Kenya.  Y’all know how much you love to buy polish plus donate to good causes with one tiny click.  Today’s your lucky day then, cuz you’re about to do a whoooooooole lotta fabulous right about now.

Also, this one has a dusty antique holographic pink base with some delicious coppery amber undertones.  You want it, oh yes you do.

Next up is the 7-piece Multichromatic Flakie Holo Toppers collection.  Previously, this was just a 5-piece, but Melissa added two new ones for this restock.  And I can see why – they’re STUNNING.  Gonna do my rundown of colors then I’ll meet you underneath.

Something Magnetic (new):

This one shifts through magenta, amber, and gold with flashes of copper, green and teal.  Jaw dropping, right?  Make sure you scroll through the rest of these in private.  Cuz Ugly Ecstasy Face is a dire thing.

A macro EXTRAVAGANZA!:

Something Fantastic (new):

This one is a fiery amber gold that shifts to bronze with flashes of copper and red.  If you kinda passed out for a second, well then you’d be correct.  Cuz what choice did you have really?  I mean, if Leonardo was standing in your living room handing you a Starbucks, would you continue to be normal and upright and whatnot?  The answer to that question is always NO.

More macros for loving:

The rest of this collection are the restocks, first of which is Something Majestic:

This one is a purple, violet, magenta, amber, gold, chartreuse, teal, green, and blue flakie.  Basically all the colors. And happiness.  Lots and lots of happiness.

An insane display of flakie business:

Next is Something Electric:

This one is electric blue, cobalt, royal purple, violet and magenta with flashes of gold, copper and teal.  Seriously, who’s tired of flakies right now?  NOT A DADGUM SOUL.  Flakies make everything better.  World problems?  Throw some flakies on it.

A galaxy of loveliness:

Now here’s Something Volcanic:

This one is a pink, amber, copper, gold, chartreuse, teal, violet and blue flakie.  I’m about 2.5 seconds from sticking my fingers in people’s faces, but SOCIETY says no.  Suprisingly, strangers don’t wanna look at mah nails! quite as much as expected.

Are we super unattractive and drool-y yet?  Well, just in case not, here’s lemme fix it:

Next up is Something Metallic:

This one is gold, copper and bronze with flashes of green, silver and teal.  Want, want and NEED; that’s your new motto.

Are you hot?  Cuz I’m hot.  And sweaty, which causes divorce if I’m not mistaken.  I don’t sweat like a lady, let’s just say.

Lastly, here’s Something Aquatic:

This one is an electric blue and purple, amber, teal, turquoise, and rich green flakie.   See that jackpot flakie on my ring finger?  I kinda wanna eat that one.  Also, someone needs to save me from me.

A macro to seal the deal:

You’re buying all those, just so you know.

I put all these flakie toppers on my naked nails – no undies – and got decent coverage in three layers.  However, over black they are next level ridiculous.  Seriously, you might need some smelling salts handy; they are super pass-out-y.

This next one is a new shade called DaVinci – and it’s beautiful and stunning and sparkly and fabulous – and SOLD OUT cuz of course it is.  It’ll be restocked at some point, though, so consider this your sneak peek.

This one is a dark teal with gold and bronze flakies and holo for extra drool factor.  It’s amazing guys.  Next time it comes around, who’s first in line then?  (You, to be clear.)

EDITED:  About two seconds after this post went live, Melissa announced a restock of this shade at 5pm CST TODAY (April 17).  This is the most important thing you’ll do all day, in case you’re making a list. Set alarms!

A macros for funsies:

The counterpart to DaVinci is Michelangelo:

This one has a pale turquoise base with bronze flakies and a bit of holo.  It’s a restock that sold out pretty quickly in the past.  At the time I am typing this, it’s still available.  A polish emergency is what I’m saying.

Will the macros ever end?

NO.

Lastly, this is the Come Alive Collection, a 4-piece sparkle-fest with two restocks and two newbies.

First up is Vitality (new):

This one is a rose golden bronze, one of the most rose gold shades Melissa’s ever made.  And for that reason alone, you’re buying one bottle of this plus 27 back up bottles in case of accidental painting of all the surfaces.  Oh, and there’s flakies and holo in there, too.  DEAD.

A macro:

Next is Humility (new):

This one is silver with gold flakies and holo.  And a cat hair hanging off my pinky.  Seems about right.

Now here’s Purity (restock):

This one is a silvery white with gold flakies and more holo and drool.

Is your tongue lolling about outside your body?  MINE TOO!  Here’s a macro:

Lastly, here’s Unity (restock):

This one is a taupe nude flakie with holo, the most dainty of the bunch and Queen of England-approved in case you need to hold tiny sandwiches later.

Last macro, and then we all go lay down for a bit.  Cuz drooling in a thousand buckets is var var hard work.

The round up:

I know I said I didn’t have time for much chit chat, but nail polish just happens sometimes, and the brain goes away somewhere.

But are you ready to have the best day ever?  Click here for shopping, then!  In addition to all these restocks, there’s a 4-piece multichrome flakie crelly collection and their new Smooth Finish fast dry top coat, of which I just threw like 18 bottles in my cart cuz you don’t get to Crazy Nail Lady by being reasonable.

EDITED:  Don’t forget, DaVinci is back in stock at 5pm CST today (April 17). Hopefully you’ve got Post-It notes on all your surfaces. 

Thanks for hanging out today.  It’s going to be a blog-heavy week this week, so hope you’ve planned accordingly.  Pajamas all day, at the minimum.  And lounging on couches, but not in a sexy way.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Things I am good at but probably shouldn’t be:

1. Being lazy .  I once pulled a muscle in my foot from stretching out on the couch with too much enthusiasm and had to be pushed around in a wheelchair at the zoo the next day.  How many people do you know who hurts themselves by laying down?  HOW MANY?  That’s right, just me.  EXPERT LEVEL isn’t even close to describing this scenario.

2. Embarrassing myself.  Try eating Gardettos in a quiet room full of people and see what happens.  You can’t even pretend it wasn’t you.

3. Looking up symptoms on the internet.  Your pee smell like Froot Loops?  Don’t worry, I’ll help you.  Your baby digging around in the cat box?  Well, that’s unfortunate!  But I’ll help you.  Headache won’t go away?  I’m not even wasting time on that one cuz we already know:  brain tumor, instantly.  Sometimes it’s not good to look up symptoms.  I should’ve died like 80 times already.

4. Checking locks before bed.  I see the lock with my eyes.  Brain registers the fact it’s clearly locked.  But just in case, let’s go ahead and touch the lock and go through the motions of locking cuz somehow that makes it even more locked – SUPER locked – and lord knows no sleep is happening unless the house is SUPER locked.  (Sooooo … I might have a medical condition.  Let’s look that up on the internet to confirm.)

Tell me, what secrets talents do you have?  Please leave me a comment and help me feel normal.  I can’t be the only weirdo in this blog.

Time for nail polish!  Melissa from MDJ Creations sent me her 7-piece Robin Moses Inspired collection to review for you today.  You like pretty things?  You like sparkle?  Well then today is your lucky day.  Look:

Mercy.

So this collection is a collaboration with Robin Moses, who is a popular nail artist and YouTuber.  Each polish was named after one of the clients she features each week, plus an extra named after herself, cuz duh, QUEEN.  The entire collection has loads of bling, and any one of them would be perfect for a night out.  Or for laying on your couch this side of comatose, cuz that’s what I did.

First up is Mammie:

Ooooooh!  Can you even?  NO. YOU. CANNOT.  This is my favorite kind of pink.  Not princess pink, but still sweet.  Like a school girl wearing frilly bloomers under her uniform.  A bit rebellious.  A bit like me.

Just kidding.  I read books and won spelling bees. I literally ran away from a pot cigarette when I was 19 cuz I was scared of it.  In other words, fun at parties.  Weeee!

Time for drooling!

Next up is Evil Client:

Someone’s sexy!  Red polish with glitters in it?  DONE.  This is the way I prefer my reds.  I mean, red crèmes are fine and all, but throw a bunch of glitter in the batch, and I’m sticking my fingers in everyone’s faces.  Look at mah nails!  LOOK AT THEM.  Do it.

More drool!

Now here’s Robin, Hail to the NAW:

This is the polish that’s named after Robin Moses, Nail Art Wizard.  I can see why she picked the purple one.  It’s spectacular!  Check her out under the lamps:

Doh!  I KNOW.  We’re all gonna go pass out real quick. BRB.

Now focus.  It’s macro time:

Next up is Guru:

There’s a whole lot of fancy going on in this one!  Bling bling!  I see pink, blue, green, purple, gold.  All the colors.  And despite all that, it was surprisingly easy to apply.  Two simple coats.  No gloop!  Hooray!

Normal people would put this one on and then go do some stuff.  It’s the perfect date night polish.  I, on the other hand, will go nowhere.  I’ll just sit here on this couch, hand modeling with remote controls and potato chips.  Maybe sip on the same wine cooler for about three hours.

Told you I was fun at parties.

Okay, that one was nuts.  Gettin’ all braggy with its sparkle.

Now here’s Compassionista:

All you blue lovers just died.  Isn’t she gorgeous?  I’m about to lose all the words.  Getting woozy.  Brain’s stopped holding my mouth closed.  I gotta pull it together before my husband comes in here and divorces me.  Cuz lolling tongues are not attractive.  

Squeeeee!  A macro!

This is Juicy Client:

Another one for the blues!  It’s the innocent side of blue, the “me in 7th grade” blue.  The blue that played dress up with imaginary babies until she turned 12 years old, blue.  The blue that fell asleep first at slumber parties, blue.  The blue that had a 50/50 chance on who wears the condom and got it WRONG, blue.

In other words, you’ll love this blue.  She’s pretty precious.

A dainty little macro:

Last one!  Here’s Nameless Client:

Y’all know I’m an official puddle of goo right now.  It’s the love of my life, my happiness in a bottle.  It’s GREEN.  Lovely, beautiful, darling green.  Good thing I saved this one to the end cuz I’m literally sitting here with my eyes closed, smiling.  I’ve turned into an idiot, clearly.

Last macro.  Let’s end this thing RIGHT.

Sigh.

The round up:

I love every single one of these.  You gotta get this collection.  Seriously.  I mean it. (Cuz I am the boss of you.)

Click here to order.  They released today and ready to go!  And what better way to start out the weekend than buying a little treat for yourself?  Well, maybe Leonardo handing you a cocktail and Funyuns.  But after that, not much!

One word of caution:  Melissa’s stuff sells fast.  As of this writing, we’re all good.  By the time you’re reading this, it’s a crap shoot.  So if you want one, you should go immediately.  It’s kinda an emergency.

Some other links to click on:

Robin Moses Nail Art YouTube channel:  click here

Robin Moses Nail Art Instagram:  click here for instructions on how to win the entire collection plus a set of Robin’s nail art brushes. Winner will be announced February 14!

MDJ Creations Instagram:  click here

My Instagram:  click here

A basket full of kittens:  click here, just because

Happy Friday everyone!  I’m about 2.5 seconds away from pajamas.

Later, loves!

Wanna justify spending your husband’s entire paycheck on nail polish?  Pick something that he did, like, oh … let’s just say he accidentally shaved off his beard that he’d been growing since your honeymoon.  A special beard.  A beard that was borne out of your love and commitment, and the fact he didn’t want to pack a razor in his suitcase.

You know those trees you plant in memory of something or someone?  It was a beard like that.  You get my point:  it was a symbolic beard.  And then let’s say there’s a restock of a 7-piece holographic multi chrome polish collection that you missed or didn’t know about the first time, and you wanted to buy every last one of them before they go away again.

WELL YOU JUST GO RIGHT AHEAD.  I mean, your husband just shaved off his honeymoon beard!  He clipped away an important part of the foundation of your relationship.  How do you come back from that?  Spoiler alert:  you don’t.  So enjoy your financial freedom ladies!  I’m pretty sure anything that happens next is completely and 100-percent-ly justified.  Christian Louboutins, I’m coming for you!

But baby steps.  Let’s buy these down below first.

So, yes, a restock is happening over at MDJ Creations.  Melissa sent me her line of holographic multi chromes to show off for you, and they’re a super pretty bunch.  So hold onto your britches real tight – and grab your smelling salts just in case.

First up is Beauty:

This one is a burgundy leaning purple with golden edges.  There’s probably lots more colors in here cuz that is the point of a multi chrome, but the ones that stick out to me the most are the purple and gold.  Beauty is beautiful, is she not?  (She is.)

Now here’s a bunch of photos:

Dead.

Still dead.

Well, that was fun.  Let’s go again!

Next is Carpe Noctem:

This one is an aqua green with an amazing purple shift.  Quite possibly my favorite out of the whole bunch.  I wore this color on both hands – thumbs included, and they hardly ever get their turn to sparkle.

You see, this is how polish swatchers gauge something gorgeous.  Did you wear it longer than 24 hours?  Did you put it on both hands?  Were the thumbs involved?  Yes, yes, and yes.  I’m not even gonna pretend were not a bunch of weirdos.

This holo will have your mouth just hanging wide open in a super unattractive way:

Didn’t it?!  Ugh, so amazing.  I want this everywhere, on all the surfaces.

Now here’s Divinity:

This one is a luscious royal purple with these golden, orange-y edges.  Again, most likely there’s a trillion other colors in here, but I’m just telling you what I see the most.  On the other hand, I swatched this one after breathing secondhand pot smoke at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert for 2 hours straight.  I might’ve been high; I dunno.

OMG, was I high?!  Can it even happen like that?  For real, 15 seconds after the concert started, here comes the pot smoke.  Then I became some stranger’s mother.  Alright, who’s smoking pot?  Hand it over!  Security!

Pretty sure I’m the most boring person on the planet.

And then here’s Double Rainbow:

Again, swatched in the middle of my pot fog, I’m pretty sure this is a purple-leaning pink with a golden green shift.  Might be a touch of red or copper in there.  A bit of orange maybe.  I DON’T KNOW.  I JUST DON’T KNOW.

Ugh, I’m never going to a concert again.  The anxiety of the whole situation is too much for this goody two shoes.  If I can’t manage to drink one wine cooler in under three hours, then you can imagine what’s happening to my brain right now.  Aside from all the normal stupid stuff, that is.

Back to the polish.  Okay, there’s definitely a purple/golden/green thing going on.  Whew!  I’m putting pajamas back on.

Next is Earth’s Ember:

This one is a red-leaning pink with golden orange-y brown edges.  Am I not the best color describer ever?  I’m so good at this, guys!  SO. GOOD.

Did I tell you these could all be one coaters if you weren’t picky?  They cover really well in a single layer.  However, I did two just to make sure everything was smooth and perfect.  I’d say “like my life” but we all know better.  You read this blog, right?

Here’s Harmony:

I know I know I know!  This is a pink with a green shift, 100 percent.  Hands down.  No denying.

Or is it purple?

Either way, it’s stunning.  These multi chromes will have you sticking your fingers in people’s faces unapologetically.  Look at mah nails!  LOOK.  DO IT.  Maybe you’ll touch random things like you’re about to give them away on The Price is Right:  a lovely coffee urn, a flashy black stapler, a lunchroom turnstile handle bar.  Your nails will look fabulous lingering on just about anything.  Everything else will be attached to a crazy person, though, just so you know.

Lastly, this is Intelligent Design:

This one rivals the green one up top as being my favorite.  It is beyond pretty.  The blue with that purple shift … ugh.  I might’ve died again just now.

So Melissa posted a live swatch of this polish on her Instagram and gave it a much better color analysis than I did. She said it’s a blue to pink to violet to purple with a golden yellow flash.  Well I got two of them right, so …  I just hope these swatches speak for themselves.  Multi chromes are shifty little beauties and with the added holographic rainbow on top, you could literally say it’s all the colors in the world and technically be right.

But whatever way you look at it, they’re all going in your basket so nothing else truly matters.  Moot moot moot.  The point is MOOT.  Still your favorite blogger though right?  Right.

The round up:

Okay guys, get your shopping hand ready cuz the restock will be going live this Friday, January 20 at 5pm CST.  These polishes plus others will be heading back to the shop for one more hurrah.  Set alarms, put Post-It Notes everywhere, then click here.  I mean it.

Later, loves!