Tag Archives: subscription boxes

Oct15

Blush Mystery Beauty Box | October 2014

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I don’t know about you, but I could use another weekend.  It’s hard coming back to work after 9 days off.  I keep asking my husband what time I can stop working altogether and live the life of a princess like I was born to do.  He looks at me as if I’m speaking Jibberish, so I’m not too sure he understands what I’m asking.  I’ll keep bringing it up to him about 15 times per day to be sure.

Until that day arrives, here’s my Blush Mystery Beauty Box:

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This is one of their better boxes.  I’ll admit the last couple of months illicited big fat yawns, and I even contemplated canceling.  Mind you, it was a fleeting thought, but a thought nonetheless.

Normally I don’t appreciate receiving a shampoo or conditioner without its counterpart.  However, because I make exceptions to my own rules and also cuz I looooove the smell of this Klorane Desert Date shampoo, I am perfectly fine with receiving it.  I already own the leave-in cream, and the scent is warm and exotic.  Do you know what I’m saying when I say that?  Like, it’s not fruity or smells like clean laundry or an ocean breeze (whatever THAT is supposed to smell like).  It isn’t woody or spicy.  It isn’t perfumey.  You minus all those smells, and whatever you have left is what Desert Date smells like.  I’m certain you understand me 100% now.

Reading the description online (because I haven’t gotten a chance to use this yet), it says it is for dry, damaged or brittle hair.  I also just now discovered there is no matching conditioner for this shampoo, only the leave-in cream and a mask.  I feel better, don’t you?  You can’t receive the matching conditioner if there isn’t one.  It’s basic mathematics.

Got another can of the Batiste dry shampoo.  Otherwise known as my all time favorite dry shampoo in all the land.  Serious, I even wrote a review on it that you can read here if you’d like.  (You’d like.)  In fact, I’m almost always in possession of a can of Batiste.  I’ve never had any other brand “clean” my hair so well.  Approved!  Put it in your basket.

I have heard fabulous things about the StriVectin-AR retinol stuff, so I’m very excited about the Advanced Retinol Night Treatment.  It also won a beauty award, and y’all know what that does to me.  It could be slug trail for all I know, but I MUST. HAVE. IT. anyway.

We all know the best thing for anti aging is retinol.  I’ll admit, though, I have zero products in my stash that has retinol in it.  That’s because I buy products based on cute packaging, which I suppose is the wrong way to go about it.  But if I can get an adorable Instagram picture out of it, my brain tells me it’s worth it.  Am I ridiculous?  Probably.  But the good news is now I DO have a product with retinol in it, and I suspect by the time I finish this teeny tiny tube, I will have the face of a 14-year-old.  I have an email into the company right now asking if this is a serum or a moisturizer, cuz my anxiety won’t let me not follow the rules.  I don’t want my face falling off, which is bound to happen the very instant I branch out on my own science experiment.  I’ll give you all the scoop in a future Empties post.

I have previously owned the Glytone Hydrate eye cream, which was the eye cream that wouldn’t die.  Thankfully, however, it was a pretty nice eye cream; otherwise, getting a repeat would be hideously frowned upon.  I like thicker consistency creams instead of those watery, thin ones, and I also prefer the kinds that sink into the skin quickly.  Lucky for Glytone, it fits the bill on both fronts.  So whenever I’m ready to use the same eye cream for the next 15 years, I’ll crack open the lid on this one.  A little goes a long way, which means good value for your money.  But it can also be very boring for those people that like to try different things.  Cuz seriously, the product will replicate itself as soon as you think you’re just about done with it.

Last product in the box is a very pretty Cargo BeachBlush in the shade Cable Beach.  First of all, the packaging is to die for.  I love little tins.  I’ve been known to buy really stupid stuff cuz in came in a tin.  Like a candle that smells like a Desert Oasis, which isn’t an actual smell (or thing – have you seen a desert oasis? No you have not).  Or a lip balm that doesn’t smell like anything at all.  So my natural inclination is to love this blush.  And while it didn’t stop me mid-swipe, or make my eyes fall out of my head in wonder, it is still pretty.  I can bet I would’ve bought this on my own if I had seen it in a store.

Alrighty, friends.  You’ve reached the end of another post.  How amazing are you?  (Very.)  I’ll be back tomorrow with something new and exciting and extra extra ramble-y.  Guaranteed.  Bye!

Oct4

Beauty DNA | September 2014

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Oh my god, where have I been?! If you read this blog, then you’d know it was Vegas. If you don’t read this blog, what are you doing with your life? Not prioritizing, for one.

I have a Vegas haul to share with you this month, and let me just say how much money doesn’t feel like actual money when you’re in Vegas. It’s quite easy to lose $100 in about 10 minutes and then walk away like NBD.

Anyway, that’s upcoming. In the meantime, here’s my Beauty DNA:

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It’s the June Jacobs Papaya Body Balm and it’s fabulous. For one, it’s made with papaya enzymes, and that’s one of the best anti-aging enzymes that exists. Who doesn’t love that? (Crazy people.) But more importantly, it smells exactly like that pineapple whip dessert you get at a salad bar – you know the one; it sits right between the crocks of pea salad and tabbouleh. I know this to be true cuz my first job was as a salad girl, so you can pretty much consider this an expert analysis then.

Aside from all that, it’s beautifully creamy, sinks nicely into skin and makes you smell like a frozen daiquiri. Which in fact I had one while I was in Vegas this past week, so again, EXPERT.

I just love Beauty DNA. I highly recommend you subscribe if you like nice full size completely customized stuff. I’ve yet to get something I absolutely don’t love or couldn’t use. And I’ve been a subscriber since their very beginning, so you have no choice but to believe me.

More tomorrow my lovelies. So happy to be back blogging. I have lots of posts just waiting to be written, so be sure to come back soon. Or better yet, subscribe, and I’ll come to you. That’s zero effort on your part, and how nice is that? (Very.)

Bye!

Sep30

Glossybox | September 2014

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Vegas is almost happening.  I’m barely paying attention to life.  Probably wise not to ask me any important questions that need a sincere answer until AFTER next week.  You know, just to be safe.

To tide you over, here’s Glossybox:

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You know how I’ve mentioned I want to own all the things, right?  Wellll, it’s true.  So I didn’t have anything from Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics, and I simply could not have that.  During the summer I bought my first (and only) OCC Lip Tar Metallic in the shade Black Dahlia.  Fast forward a few months when Glossybox does a spoiler and shows us we will be getting an OCC Lip Tar in our September boxes.  Well, how nice!  Seems like they will be sending out one of two colors – a coppery orange called Authentic or a dark burgundy metallic called … Black Dahlia.  Ummmmm, excuse me, whaaaaa?  Whyyyyeeeee?  Out of all the colors OCC offers, I have a 50/50 chance of getting the same one I already own.  Those are terrible odds.  Do you know how many times I’ve had a 50/50 chance happening and it go awry?  Like, they always choose the guy I don’t like on The Bachelorette even though it is QUITE CLEAR who her true soulmate is.  Sooooooooooo frustrating.

But anyway, I received the coppery orange color so this entire story doesn’t matter.

If you haven’t tried a Lip Tar before, you need to go find one stat.  Nicely pigmented – some insanely so – and a little goes a very long way.  Your $18 investment will last you a lifetime, and that’s probably not much of an exaggeration.  I love how it comes with a little brush.  What feels more glamourous than applying your lipstick with a brush?  Maybe having a necklace put on you by a Prince. But after that?  Not much.

Again, a subscription box decides to send out a conditioner with no matching shampoo.  Is this a new trend I am unaware of?  Are we mismatching shampoos and conditioners now?  I’m sorry, I don’t think my OCD can deal. That’s like reading book 1 and 2 of Hunger Games, but leaving out book 3.  You cannot start Hunger Games and then NOT FINISH Hunger Games.  Everyone knows that.

Regardless, here is the Bvlgari hair conditioner.  It’s has a light au the Vert perfume scent, and it has been suggested to use this conditioner when you don’t feel like applying actual perfume.  I never feel like applying perfume, but I also never feel like applying conditioner without it’s shampoo counterpart.  So pretty much my only option at this point is shaving cream.  I’m open to other ideas, however, if anyone has found alternate uses for rogue bottles of conditioner.

Received the Vichy Liftactiv Night Cream, which makes me happy. I used another Vichy moisturizer several months back, and I absolutely loved it. Scored high on texture marks, which is basically all that matters to me. Well, that and it’s from France. As soon as I get back from my Vegas trip, I will start in on it, then let you know all about it in my October empties post. (Get excited.)

Got another tube of the Benefit They’re Real mascara. I’m not opposed to this, as it’s fantastic mascara. In fact, it’s the #1 best selling prestige brand mascara in the country. Certainly that holds clout with some people? I mean, it does me. If you’re a best seller, award winner or heavily hyped, you could be a jar of slug trail for all I care. I want you anyway. I’m very discerning in that way. (Also shallow.) (Probably.)

Last product in the box is an
Essie nail polish in the shade Madison Ave-Hue. Can’t say I’m overly thrilled about receiving this item, but it is a pretty unique color of pink and therefore I have decided to keep it. Yes, I make up my own conditions to my own rules. I hope you’re jotting this down in a notebook. There may be a quiz later.

I feel it may be important to note that if you’re gonna love a nail polish, Essie is a safe way to go. I’ve used a few of their colors, and have liked the brand very much, aside from the fact it’s nail polish and I don’t enjoy nail polish. That’s pretty much high praise if you ask me. Which you did subconsciously, otherwise, I’d be reading YOUR blog, wearing pajamas and not suffering from the twinges of carpal tunnel that only 132 posts can bring about.

Well that’s it, guys. I’m gonna try to do one more post before my trip then most likely it’ll be dark in here til I get back. A good time if any to reread this blog from start to finish. Toodles!

Sep25

Birchbox | September 2014

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So, if I told you a little Gucci thing happened today, along with a teeny tiny Charlotte Tilbury thing, accompanied by a wee bit of a Dior thing, would you believe me?

Do you even read this blog?  You know the answer to that.

Here’s a Birchbox for you to love and kiss on:

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Or you may just stare at with dead eyes, kind of like how I did.

Okay, that’s not fair to the Shiseido serum because that stuff I selected specifically as my spoiler item.  But everything else I either don’t want, don’t like, or have already owned.  Ho hum pigs bum.  And that’s all I have to say about that.

Except that would make for a very short and boring blog post.  So let’s discuss.  I got a little Davines OI/Absolute Beautifying shampoo, conditioner and hair oil set.  But the shampoo is a single-use packet then I’m left with this ginormous tub of conditioner. WTF am I supposed to do with conditioner all by itself?  I don’t care about the hair oil being single-use cuz I couldn’t give two spits about hair oil.  But come on with the shampoo.  And the fact that I have long hair, this may be more like a half-use packet.  I’m super not impressed right now.  This may be the most glorious shampoo in all the land, but right now I’d rather pout instead.  I have no idea when I’ll use it because at this point I can’t be bothered.  Boo.

Aside from all that, this particular kind of shampoo and conditioner is for shine, softness and body.  My three favorite hair adjectives.  So it may work out after using it once that I fall in love.  It’s happened before.  Have I mentioned Carol’s Daughter to anyone?  Yes? Welll, it’s true.

Since Birchbox has been letting us choose one of our products ahead of time, as soon as I saw the Shiseido Ultimune Power Infusing Concentrate was being offered, I didn’t even care what the other choices were.  I love serums and all their (sometimes empty) promises.  I want to try them all, own them all, hoard them all.  Using serums makes me feel like I’m pampering myself, doing something special.  I may be applying floral scented Crisco on my face for all I know, but the idea of it, the hope that it’s going to replace my old face with a new one, that’s what keeps me coming back for more.

According to Shiseido, after 1 week skin appears to glow more than ever.  My skin doesn’t glow at all, so this sounds amazing.  After 4 weeks, it’s supposed to improve firmness and resilience all while making wrinkles less visible.  But honestly, they had me at glow.  Anything after that is just a bonus.

Got my second tube of Yu-Be Moisturizing Skin Cream, and let me just say how I didn’t even use the first tube.  I dunno.  What do you use this for?  Cuticles?  Dry elbows?  If you ask the Japanese, it’s a miracle cream.  Maybe I should probably listen cuz I’ve not once seen a wrinkled Japanese, have you?  Ideas for use include application on lips, cracked heels, or anywhere there’s dry patches on the skin.  Recommended use is after bathing.  So most likely I’ll end up putting this cream on my callused pinky toes where I keep my high heel injuries.  Seriously, if you poked me in the pinky toe with a sharp pencil, the only thing I’d wonder about is why you’re in the floor with a pencil.  Get up.  That’s how crazy starts.

Next item is this pinkish gold liquid highlighter by Temptu.  First of all, let me say that this is a really pretty color, especially if you have cool-toned skin.  It’s shimmery and feminine.  Put a drop on your hand, rub it around with your finger, then dab it on the top of your cheekbones, Cupid’s Bow, inner corner of your eye, anywhere you want an extra glow.  The downside is that it’s liquid.  As in a takes-more-effort-than-a-powder kind of liquid.  I don’t have time to be messing with a liquid in the mornings.  In fact, if you measured my time in efforts, you may get trapped in a black hole of nothingness.  I’m not sure what that means, but if you come up with the answer ZERO, then you’d be right.  So this product gets tossed in the weekend-use-only pile, which isn’t a bad pile to be in.  It’s better than the Circular File, if you know what I mean.

Last product in the box is the Laura Mercier Full Blown Lash mascara.  I have owned a sample of this mascara before but I had to toss it due to a pink eye sort of situation.  I can’t say I was beside myself with excitement by the fact I got another one, but it’s not a bad mascara.  It applies nicely.  The brush is full of bristles, and my teeny baby lashes love brushes like that.  I had no clumping or flaking issues of any kind.  Got a decent amount of length and volume.  In other words, nothing to complain about.  I’ll use it and be grateful.  I could’ve gotten a perfume in the box instead.  And that would have been way more tragic.

All done.  Received a new credit card in the mail today, so I have lots of pretending THAT didn’t just happen going on.  So, var var busy.

Sep24

Ipsy | September 2014

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Payday (aka dangerous territory) is looming.  I’ve already set all my bills up for autopay like a responsible human, and I have money left over that refuses to sit in a savings account (like a non-responsible human; whatever).  That Gucci eyeshadow duo is going in the basket, people.  And also a teeny tiny purchase at Sephora.  Maybe even something from Nordstrom.  Ack!  I’m barely paying attention to my surroundings at this point.

Let’s try to focus.  Here’s my Ipsy:

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If you’ve been counting, you’d know this is my third sample of the Briogeo Don’t Despair, Repair hair mask.  It’s hard to love another hair mask after you’ve found THE ONE.  I tried it, it was fine, but then I quickly forgot about it.  Even the second jar I got of this mask was full size and I still didn’t care.  Nothing has beat out my Carol’s Daughter.  In fact, if you haven’t bought the Carol’s Daughter mask after all my blabbering about it, you may wanna get your brain checked for signs of a mental health condition.  To read my original review of the Briogeo, you can click here.

I got this handy little toner/serum/moisturizer 3 in 1 by Leeanni Eco.  I got the light version, but not really sure what that means.  Maybe less rich or less chemicals?  Dunno.  It’ll definitely be a time saver for those who care about saving time. I, on the other hand, find taking off my makeup as a therapeutic ritual so I won’t be using this as a 3 in 1 but just as a single moisturizer after my other toner and serum.  Hope that won’t give my face some kind of product overdose and then revolt in a breaking-out or falling-off sort of way.  I’m starting it tonight since I just finished a moisturizer yesterday.  I’ll report back in a future empties post.

Got this rich berry Hikari lipstick in the shade Cabernet.  It was a nice color, but I just wasn’t feeling it.  I feel like berry shades, fuchsia shades, pink shades in general, just are not my cup of tea.  Right now I’m really into true purples of all varieties, so it’s hard to switch gears sometimes.  I used this lipstick once, appreciated it for about 2 hours, then passed it along to someone else who could love it even more.

When Ipsy was publishing their spoilers for the month, I swore if I didn’t get the Crown Brush Infinity Shadow/Crease duo brush in my bag, there would be a temper-tantrum-type situation on their hands.  Luckily, I don’t have to hurt anyone.  This is a really great brush.  The shadow side is very plush and holds a nice amount of product.  The crease side is precise, but soft.  I’ve been using it for about a week and I’m very happy with it.  The only downfall is storage.  One end gets to rest at the bottom of my dirty pencil cup.  Will probably need to figure out some sort of solution for that.  Also will probably involve Velcro.

Last product in the box is a Pacifica eye pencil in a brown color called Fringe.  This is your basic, run-of-the-mill eyeliner.  The brown color is a medium shade that provided a nice smudge-y, smokey look when layered on top of brown eyeshadow with my brown eyes.  Despite it’s averageness, I’m going to keep it.  However, I couldn’t get it to show up in my waterline for nothing.  I mean nothing in the very, very literal sense.  So beware.  Unless your waterline is very dry, then maybe.

This seems like a very short review.  I guess there wasn’t much to say about the products.  The brush is hands-down the best of the bunch.  Everything else was of the take-it-or-leave-it variety.  I’ll be back again tomorrow with hopefully more interesting things to talk about.  Bye, friends!

Sep17

Blush Mystery Beauty Box | September 2014

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I survived yesterdays Ulta sale.  Only 10 more days to go.  If I somehow manage to emerge from this without permanent damage, it will be a miracle.  I mean, I’ve already bought two things a few days ago, but I’m talking about from this point forward.  Anything from the past doesn’t count.

Moving on!  Here’s my Blush Mystery Beauty Box:

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How unimpressive is this box?  Very.

I dunno, guys.  I opened it and just felt very blah about the whole situation.  Maybe once I try everything I will change my mind, but for now it is an unfavorite.  However, not everything is a poo.  Well, you’ll see.  Just keep reading.

First item is a staple product, a pack of Lumene Sensitive Touch cleansing wipes.  Nothing to get too excited about, although I will use them.  In fact, I just finished the last of my current pack of wipes so this actually comes in handy as I know I’ll never run errands in the evening on a work day.  Who wants to go to Walmart on a Wednesday wearing heels and needing pajamas (and possibly cocktail) in a very bad way?  Not this girl.  There’s only 10 wipes in the pack so I’ll definitely be buying more wipes on my Saturday grocery shopping trip.  Maybe more Lumene ones if they’re fabulous.  We’ll see.

The most gigantic product in the bag is perhaps the most useless to me.  Sounds about right.  It’s the Color Wow One Minute Transformation styling cream.  Is it time for bed yet, cuz I just got sleepy.  Apparently this helps liven up your dry, frizzy hair into liquidy smooth, silky hair (per their own claims).  So I thought I’d work a little into the ends of my hair to see if it will tame them into submission, as that’s the part that always seems to have a mind of its own.  If you were to compare my before and after picture and then accidentally drop them on the floor then pick them up and try to arrange them back again your brain would seize up from trying to decipher which one is which.  No, this product did not work for me.  And yes, that was probably a run-on sentence.

I’m going to give this product one more chance before I toss it.  There is another application method which may work better.  You can apply it on your hair then take a round brush and hair dryer to it for a few seconds.  That sounds like a lot of work for a non hair washing day, but I’m doing it for you guys.  I am a professional, just so you know.

Now for something I love.  If you have roughly $20 and you want to buy a really nice dry shampoo, try the Klorane one.  It’s very very good, which is an expert opinion if I’ve ever heard one.  It does have white powder in it, but I don’t mind that one bit.  To me the white powder means it’s working.  If I don’t see white powder I consider the product defective.  It’s probably a bit of psychological brain trickery thinking the white powder performs better.  But it also could be the truest, most accurate statement ever spoken in the history of the world.  I might as well be President with that kind of power.

Aside from all that, I wouldn’t buy a full size can of this because the cheap Batiste works just as good.

Next item is the most intriguing.  It’s the SkinCeuticals Advanced Pigment Corrector.  First of all, it won an Allure Breakthrough Award, so that right there is enough to make me pay attention.  You apply it like a serum (p.m.) or after an antioxidant (a.m.) and it’s supposed to lighten your dark spots plus keep them from coming back.  Does that not sound like a miracle?  Bare-faced, I have a splotchy, freckley complexion.  Remnants of old pimples.  Even full coverage foundation has trouble fixing me.  I have sun damage and bad decisions all over my face because when I was young, tanning beds cured skin cancer, not caused it.  So I’m actually kind of excited about giving this a try.  It has hydroquinone in it, which is the gold-standard for pigment lightening.  Also, retinol.  It’s not a very big tube, so hopefully it starts working quick so I can let you know if the $90 price tag is worth it.

Got this stick bronzer from Vapour Organic Beauty.  I’m not a huge fan of cream products, especially ones that draw super scary dark stripes on your face.  I mean, what if I do it wrong and ruin my makeup and have to start all over?  Who has time for that?  Needless to say, I experimented with this on a Saturday when I had nothing more to do than lay around in pajamas watching Breaking Bad on Netflix.  (In other words, var var busy.)  At first application it was like Holy Moly! but then I started blending out the streak with my fingers and it simply melted into my skin.  Left a very natural bronzey sheen right in the hollow of my cheek.  Gained some confidence so finished up with some bronze along my hair line and on my temples.  It looked really nice.  So I figure on days I have more time to spend doing bronzer or contour, I can use this without fear.  On most days when I’m getting ready for work where I spend most of my time getting my eyeliner drawn on straight, I’ll have to stick with my quick and easy powder.

Last product in the box is a lipgloss from Juice Beauty.  I got the color Guava which is a bit of an orange shade.  It’s creamy, glossy and pretty as far as pigment goes. The smell is a little odd – kind of sweet at first, but the longer you think about it the less sweet it becomes.  It’s not enough to make me not use it, but it’s surely not a NYX Butter Gloss which if I hadn’t already known it was lipgloss I’d swear it was cake.  Well, with my eyes closed. I mean I can clearly see it’s not cake.  But it smells just like cake.  If my eyes were closed and someone put the wand underneath my nose … Oh, you know what I mean.  Long story short, I don’t hate the Juicy Beauty lipgloss.

We’ve reached the end.  Carpal tunnel is about to set in so the timing is perfect.  Hope y’all enjoy the rest of your day.  I’ll be back tomorrow with more interesting things to say.  Would you expect otherwise?  No you would not.

Sep15

Sample Society | September 2014

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I’m trying very hard to ignore the fact that Ulta is having their 21 days of beauty.  I don’t need to know about Tarte’s $10 mascara.  I also don’t need to know about Mally’s Face Defender that is discounted by $15.  But most importantly, I absolutely do NOT need to know these sales are good for one day only.  Don’t they know what kind of massive urgency is happening in my brain right now?  And that my credit card is about to rebel in an overdraft, cutting itself in half sort of way?

I’m itching all over.  I’ve got the hives.

To distract myself, I give you my Sample Society:

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Got a tube of the Alterna Caviar Repair Re-Texturizing Protein Cream.  I’ve usually had good luck with these Alterna Caviar products, so I’m looking forward to trying this one. I’ve got super fine hair that tends to tangle easily (and therefore break easily), so any product that might fortify my hair, make it stronger, sleeker, better – well, who’s gonna say no to that?  (Crazy people.)  I’m finishing up another product right now, but as soon as I’m done, this one is next in line.  And as long as it doesn’t make my hair feel dirty, sticky, or greasy (like the Alterna Bamboo thickening cream did), we’re gonna get along just fine.

Perhaps the most exciting this in the box is this full-size $85 jar of Restorsea eye cream.  With the inclusion of this product right here, I could throw away everything else and still comes out dollars ahead.  In fact, I’m pretty sure that falls under the category of SAVING MONEY and therefore the Gucci Cosmetics eyeshadow quad that’s about to happen has zero guilt stamped all over it.  My clicking hand is getting var var excited.

So I was reading the little booklet that Allure put out that gives mini reviews on the products, and it was getting me totally excited to start using the eye cream.  Talked about its winning virtues as well as how it smells and feels.  Apparently despite it’s boring white color and non-existant smell, it will make you look like you’ve been sleeping in a field of daisies for the past 15 years.  All good things, right?  Welllllll – I can’t speak for the results or anything (yet), but I will say if this thing is odorless I must be smelling things wrong.  If you enjoy the aroma of a sour washrag topped with a skosh of wet paper pile, then this, THIS, will be your sanctuary.  It smells so wrong, that I’m not even sure I got a fresh jar despite it being wrapped up in cellophane and clearly brand new.  Like, I’m kind of scared to use it.  Did I get a doozy?  Or does everyone elses smell too?  If you subscribe to Sample Society, please go sniff your jar and leave a comment.  Otherwise, my anxiety will run rampant.

For your totally useless product needs, I present the Tarte Brazillance facial tanning wipes.  Granted, I know there are people out there that love these.  I hear they are some of the best, most natural looking wipes of the self-tan genre.  But if you’ve come here for the official word then you’ll be waiting a while.  I haven’t self-tanned since 8th grade except for a very brief experimentation of some Jergen’s spray can back in 2005.  It involved me standing naked in my bathroom and my baby sister disturbed for life.  Well, how else you gonna tan everything if you don’t force someone else to do it for you?

One product I am enjoying is this little tube of the Lorac POREfection mattifying primer.  It makes my face feel very smooth and I’d swear my foundation goes on better.  I’d like to say it mattifies me, but honestly I haven’t noticed anything too drastic in that direction.  I’d also like to say it blurs my pores, but nothing really does that for me.  I don’t believe I am your ideal candidate for pore-filling.  When products claim they will make you flawless, they aren’t referring to a 40-year-old with a splotchy complexion and pores that dig to China.  Pretty sure they just mean normal people.  But if you like the texture of a silicone primer, this one is pretty nice.

Last product in the box is the Givenchy Dahlia Divin perfume.  Y’all know how perfume puts me to sleep, and this one is no exception.  I didn’t even smell it out of curiosity that’s how much I cared about it.  Nope, just stuck it in my re-gifting box for someone else to enjoy.  However, this is the perfume that Alicia Keyes inspired.  The notes are white flower, jasmine, sandalwood, plum, golden fruit, patchouli and vetiver.  And according to my research, it is a “floral woody” scent with a “radiant” feel and the woman who wears this is a sublime, sensual modern goddess.

Mmmmmk.

Hopefully that means something to you perfume lovers out there.  This one just debuted this month, so if anything, it’s NEW and I don’t know about you but I just love being among the first to own something.  Which is why that aforementioned Gucci Cosmetics thing is about 2 seconds away from reality.  I’m a woman on the cusp, what can I say?

That’s all for now, friends.  Enjoy your day and I’ll be back again soon for more fun stuff.  Bye!

Sep12

New Beauty Test Tube | September 2014

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Somebody turned on the cold air outside and I’m not happy one bit. Why do we go from 100-degrees to freezing cold so quickly like that? Can it be in the low 80s longer than one day please? This 50-degree morning about aggravated my old aerobics injury and I was none too pleased.

Well, here’s my New Beauty Test Tube then:

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I’m just gonna put it out there. I wouldn’t have bought any of this stuff myself. Maybe the eyebrow pencil. But everything else wouldn’t have caught my eye if it was flashing neon. Lemme explain.

This It’s a 10 Miracle Leave-In is boring as hell. I’ve used the light version (courtesy of New Beauty) and it about put me to sleep, so why New Beauty deemed it necessary to send me the non-light version is beyond me. To be fair, however, I haven’t tried this one yet. Maybe it’s so much more fabulous that the light. Maybe the light version took out all the good stuff. I mean, when I have a non-fat no-whip Starbucks it’s nowhere near as delicious as full fat. In other words, I’m gonna give it a try anyway. In other other words, I want a Starbucks.

Lotion doesn’t excite me too much. I use it, yes, but I don’t get psychotic over it. Not usually anyway. So receiving this Molton Brown pink pepperpod lotion in the tube made my face go like this: -__-

At least it’s expensive. Full size of this is $42. So if I don’t get beside myself over the smell (slightly peppery, aptly), or thrilled enough over the packaging (several notches over Dollar Tree, but it ain’t no L’Occitane), I can revel in the fact it costs the same as supplying water flow to my house for an entire month.

The Miracle 10 exfoliating AHA cream is perhaps the best thing in the box. It’s also the smallest thing in the box, so that sounds about right. I had to contact the company to figure out what to do with this stuff. You know how scared I get when I don’t have explicit instructions. Just telling me I apply this after cleaning my face tells me approximately ZERO of what I really need to know. Is it serum, is it moisturizer? Is it both? According to the lovely people at Miracle 10 it’s ALL those things and more! complete with jazz hands. I was told I can use it and then moisturize after. But I can also use it with a serum; however, they needed to know what the active ingredients in my serum was first before committing to that statement. So officially I’m properly terrified. I’m just gonna go with option 1 and cleanse, tone, Miracle 10, then moisturize. Seems safer and less face-falling-off.

I’m alright with this ybf brow pencil. I usually use a powder to fill in my brows, so having another option is fine by me. This particular one is a universal color that’s supposed to work with everyone’s eyebrows. Also, according to its website, it is the world’s best selling eyebrow pencil. It is? How often have you seen ybf in the stores, on YouTube, or brought up in casual conversation? My experiences tally up to zero, so how it became the #1 best seller seems like a very awesome magic trick.

Aside from all that, the spooley brush on the end is good quality and it applies pretty decently. It’s gonna take me some practice to actually create an eyebrow that can be seen in public, but I’ll get there.

If you’ve been paying attention, you’d know this is my third can of the Avene thermal water spray. What am I supposed to do with this? Well, the first can went in the trash. The second can I decided to keep and have been spritzing my chest and shoulders with it before applying lotion (to make it absorb better – a purpose I may have just made up). At some point I will use it as a setting spray, to moisten my eyeshadow brush, or as a facial toner. Or it may just sit in the darkness of my under the sink cabinet for the next 15 years. I mean, this is my third can and I’ve yet to finish one.

Last thing in the box was this Equitance skin care kit in the form of a cleanser, toner, serum and moisturizer. Not pictured is a one-time-use packet of sunscreen and a pouch of vitamins. I’ll tell you right now I’m not even gonna mess with those two things. But the kit is alright despite it looking like it came out of a doctor’s office. I’ve already decided I’m taking all of it with me to Vegas since it’s so travel friendly. It’s the brightening formula, and lord knows I could use some brighter skin. If all my splotches and freckles would kindly vacate, that’d be great, thanks.

Well now that you’ve been prepped appropriately for bed, I’m gonna go ahead and go now. Thanks for hanging out. More fun stuff tomorrow.

Sep9

Glossybox | August 2014

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Something’s up with Glossybox.  A slew of subscribers didn’t get their August boxes until practically the middle of September.  Isn’t that strange?  I’m all for waiting until the end of the month to do your shipping – I mean, if you get the box every 30 days, then technically it’s on time – but to wait until the next month to ship the previous month’s box?  No likey.

Well, regardless … here’s what took so long:

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Well, dangit, it’s a pretty good box.  I was all ready to start pouting and complaining.  You know how when you’re in a bad mood and someone tries to get you out of the bad mood and you’re not welcoming of that idea one bit cuz you’re not done being in a bad mood?  This is like one of those times.  I will tell YOU when I’m ready to be happy again.  Thanks.

I’m generally okay with getting a shampoo and conditioner.  I have been using samples without having to purchase anything on my own for about a year now.  I was close to running out and was waiting for Glossybox to arrive so I could start using this Uberliss duo.  But then I was waiting and waiting and waiting for eons.  Broke down and had to buy some full-size L’Oreal stuff.  Well what a big o poo, ya know?  So I have no idea when I’ll get around to using this stuff, as I have also traded in some birthday money for some other shampoo and conditioner that I’ve been wanting to try for awhile (more on that later).

In the meantime, just know this is a hydrating sulfate-free shampoo that is supposed to be super foamy, strengthening and magical.  I’ll let you know how it fares once it falls in my empties bag.

Next product is a neat little cream highlighter by Kryolan.  It was custom built for Glossybox subscribers and is just the loveliest shade of pinky gold.  Or maybe it’s more of a champagne.  Doesn’t matter.  Point is, it’s very pretty.  Has miniscule sparkle – it’s primarily just a glowy, subtle sheen.  If you somehow manage to make yourself look a shiny mess with this stuff, you are DOING IT WRONG.  It’s pretty much idiot-proof, and I’m so happy to have it.  Best thing in the box, hands-down.

And even though you all know I don’t like nail polish that much, this shimmery purple shade from the Sparitual Explore Collection is rather pretty.  I don’t know about you, but I enjoy a good purple.  I’m super into purple lips right now, and purple eyeshadow looks really good with my brown eyes.  What this has to do with this purple nail polish is absolutely zero.  However, I will say I don’t have a purple this shade, nor have I ever tried the Sparitual brand.  So I’m gonna do mani and pedi this weekend and give it a try.  Then put it in my junk drawer for the next 11 years.

I’ve been using a day cream for the past 2 months that I haven’t really enjoyed.  I was forcing myself to use it since it was full-size product and I paid for it.  You know, trying to be a responsible adult and all that.  Then I received this Eslor Firming Collagen day cream, and thought I’d go ahead and use it even though I wasn’t done with the other.  Well, if I was trying to teach myself a lesson, I either failed or succeeded depending on how you look at it.  This Eslor stuff feels ahhhh-ma-zing on the face.  Like the softest most delicate cream of life.  It took me about 2 seconds to toss the other cream in my empties bin.  Why suffer needlessly? And even though the full size is $85, I’m kinda sorta considering it anyway.

Someone send help.

Last product in the box is what I thought would be my most absolute favorite.  It’s the Eyeko Skinny Mini liquid liner pen. I have the Eyeko Skinny Brush mascara and I absolutely love it so I had every expectation of loving the eyeliner too. So I tried it a few days ago. Annnnnnd … awful. Like the worst pen I’ve ever tried. It was barely black – more like a pale grey wash on my eyelid. I thought I was doing it wrong for a second, so I’m shaking the pen, wiping the nib, praying to Baby Jesus. But nothing helped. It was hideous. Remember that great mood I was forced to be in earlier? Well let’s just say I knew I wasn’t ready. I’m gonna give it one more chance this weekend before I pass it along to my sister.

And because Glossybox was so late last month, I am now behind on my September boxes. That’s just great. I’ve gotta blog in my sleep just to keep up. My life is hard you guys. SO. HARD.

Bye!

Sep3

Beauty DNA | August 2014

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Happy September everybody! Wishing it wasn’t still practically 100 degrees outside. Can’t we have a proper fall for once? Like in the 70s with no humidity would be lovely, thanks.

Here’s my Beauty DNA:

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Did your jaw just drop cuz mine did. Who sends a full size $96 product and only charges $25 for it? Crazy people? Or very smart people? Cuz this delivery solidifies my love for Beauty DNA and I’m pretty much a subscriber for life now. Life times $25 per month = a math problem I can’t even wrap my brain around.

They sent me the MDSolarSciences Evening Facial Repair serum. I’m not kidding when I say the word serum is magic. My cat ears instantly perk up. I love serums. I want to own alllll the serums. Pretty sure at some point my old face will be replaced with a new face and it’ll be due to all my serums. And then when people laugh at me cuz of my 17 step skincare routine, I can laugh right back at them and not even crack a wrinkle.

Cuz why? Cuz serums.

This particular one contains retinol, otherwise known as Anti-Aging Superhero. Claims to assist in destroying hyperpigmentation, fine lines, wrinkles, pores and blemishes. I’m super excited about giving it a try. Cuz I don’t know about you, but my “fine” lines and gaping pores are about to piss me off.

Gotta scoot. More fun and excitement coming soon. Massive birthday haul shown in parts. Stay tuned!