Tag Archives: blush lacquers

Blush Lacquers: Beach Hunny Collection 

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We’re not gonna talk about what time it is right now and what I should be doing instead of what I’m actually doing, cuz a reminder of my failures is not something I’m in the mood for at the moment.  I mean, just because I intend (at some point) to stop going to bed at 2am on a work night doesn’t mean I’m not dying of exhaustion in the meantime.  Good thing I’m such a Trophy Wife, or we’d all be worried.

More goodies to share with you today!  Victoria with BLUSH Lacquers has another stunning collection coming your way, and if you’ve got a thing for some gorgeous-y shimmers, well then you’re about to have a VERY good day.  Take a look!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Look at you with your jaw all drop-y like that!  The Ugly Ecstasy Face is lurking, just so you know.

These five beauties are part of the Beach Hunny collection and are inspired by vintage swimwear and hot summer days at the beach with the radio on.  Each polish has a light touch of holo that is reminiscent of glistening beach waves and/or sweat bead mustache, if you’re me.  Cuz I don’t sweat like a lady, that’s why.

Welcome to Speed Blog #4, blah blah blah.  Yes, we’re still doing this thing.  Here’s the quick rundown of colors, sans the commentary I want to do so bad but can’t cuz APPARENTLY napping isn’t conducive to blog writing for some reason.  Ugh.  LAME.

TEENY WEENY PINK BIKINI

DESCRIPTION:  A squishy Barbie doll pink jelly base with a red/purple/blue shifting shimmer and sparkling touch of holo pigment

OPACITY:  Three coats

SURFBOARD

DESCRIPTION:  A teal base with green shimmer and a sparkling touch of holo pigment

OPACITY:  Two coats

BANANA BOAT FLOAT

DESCRIPTION:  A soft butter yellow with glowing white-ish blue shimmer and a sparkling touch of holo pigment

OPACITY:  Three coats

And then I put pants on:

I went outside, just for you.  Best blogger ever?  I say YES.

VINTAGE VINYL

DESCRIPTION:  A soft ballerina pink with a red to green shifting shimmer and a sparkling touch of holo pigment

OPACITY:  Three coats

MY BEACH UMBRELLA-ELLA-ELLA

DESCRIPTION:  A periwinkle base with a pinkish-purple shimmer and a sparkling touch of holo pigment

OPACITY:  Two coats

THE ROUND UP

The formula on these is consistently amazing across the board.  Perfectly smooth, no gloop.  And I’ve mentioned it before, but I’ll say it again:  the applicator brush is WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF.  Am I am 9-year-old who just walked into a room full of office supplies?  Might as well be.  Squeeee!

Surprisingly, my favorite of the bunch is the yellow one. It legit looks like butter, which is basically the elixir of life, so naturally I want it on all the surfaces.  COMPLETELY NORMAL BEHAVIOR in case you’re curious.  

This collection releases Friday, July 28 at 7pm EST in the BLUSH Etsy store as well as the Girly Bits international stockist site.  I suggest setting at least 17 alarms, cuz if you miss out on these, it’s a sad state of affairs for everyone.  Get on it boo boos!  You can thank me in Starbucks later.

Connect with BLUSH Lacquers!  The linky loos:

Instagram

Fan Group

And while you’re in a clicking mood, click here for my Instagram.  Cuz we’s best friends whether you want it or not.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

PART 3 Polish Pickup July 2017: Cocktails & Mocktails

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We’re finally here.  Part 3 of this blogging EXTRAVAGANZA!  I’ve been writing all day long, ignoring responsibilities like a DADGUM CHAMPION.  Hubby tried to remind me there was a sink full of dishes, and I just laughed and laughed and laughed. Cuz clearly I AM BUSY and I only took a break one time to change the wallpaper in my fake bakery.

And if that’s not enough overachieve-y for you, there’s a strong possibility I’m blogging from the bathtub.  I mean, the blog don’t write itself now does it?  And the legs don’t shave themselves either.  Booooo.

Before you continue, I highly recommend reading Parts 1 and 2 first.  I’ve left links for you at the bottom of this post.  I’d put them up top for you as well, but honestly, we’ve had enough effort on display over here to last us at least 37 years.

Soooo, doing my deed as the designated blogger for the July Polish Pickup cuz apparently someone out there likes this weird little world I live in.  Okay, 9 more to go!  Let’s get into it.

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As a reminder, the theme for July is Cocktails & Mocktails.  As your Speling Bee Champion of 1987, REST ASSURED.  It is quite possible to be booed on your 21st birthday for sipping a Jagermeister shot like a fancy lady.  But despite all that, I am an extremely cool person.

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CHIRALITY POLISH:  Blended Frost

DESCRIPTION:  A medium blue holo base with subtle hints of green within the holo rainbow

COATS:  Exceptional coverage in one. I did two for funsies, but some may be okay with just one. 

This is my first go with Chirality Polish, and lemme just say I am beyond impressed.  This polish is gorgeous!  The green hints turns the color almost like a teal blue/green and for real, my brain has stopped holding my mouth closed.  Someone’s getting unattractive!  Hubby needs to look away, cuz there’s only so much sexy to go around while your tongue is lolling about outside your body.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.chiralitypolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/chiralitynailpolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/chiralitypolish

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BLUSH LACQUERS:  Mojito Mondays 

DESCRIPTION:  A soft lime linear holographic base with golden shimmer and gold to lime green shifting holo glitters

COATS:  Two very smooth, quick and easy ones. The applicator brush practically needs a luxury tax on it cuz OMG, it’s fabulous!

Listen, if you read my blog, you all know I swatch a lot of BLUSH.  Victoria makes some of the most breaktaking, stunning and unique polishes I’ve ever seen.  If you haven’t tried her stuff, you need to at least start with this one.  It’s happiness in a bottle.  With a Leonardo on top, for sure.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12.75

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/blushlacquers

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/blushlacquers

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/groups/blushbeauties

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PAHLISH:  The Green Muse

DESCRIPTION:  A super bright acid green foil

COATS:  Two, amazingly smooth

You’re looking at four fingers of Green Apple Jolly Rancher goodness, and I swear I’d lick it if SOCIETY wasn’t so judgy.  Cuz what is the point in life if you can’t lick a juicy green nail polish every once in a while?  I ask you, WHAT IS THE POINT?  Might taste slightly more poison-y, but we’ll never know for sure.  Behaving normal is zero fun sometimes.

Under the lamps: 

Macros: 

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://pahlish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/pahlish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/pahlish

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ANONYMOUS LACQUER:  Jamaican Me Smile

DESCRIPTION:  A light pink/rose gold linear holographic with strong gold shimmer

COATS: Two, nice and smooth

Oh, now this!  What a delicate and soothing shade.  It’s just so lovely to look at, with that gold shimmer peeking through.  This polish practically begs to hold a tiny cappucino; it’s dainty and so sweet.  Or if you’re having little sandwiches later, you’re already halfway prepared.  Tea with the Queen?  BRING IT.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://anonymouslacquer.bigcartel.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/anonymouslacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/anonymouslacquer

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CONTRARY POLISH:  Sweet Poison

DESCRIPTION:  A blue leaning green with aqua shimmer, sapphire microflakies and a light linear holo effect

COATS:  Two, the most beautiful of your life!

Someone needs to wheel me over one of those old fashioned fainting couches, cuz I am legit DONE with being upright.  There’s a noodle leg epidemic happening, and WE. ARE. IN IT.  There’s drool buckets and smelling salts and general unattractiveness.  Quick! lock the door, lest hubby walks in and divorces me.

In other words, I reallllllly love this polish.  You will too.  Good news:  you’re buying it.

Under the lamps:

Macros: 

Price: $11

Linky loos:

Shop http://contrarypolish.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/contrarypolish

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/contrarypolish

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FANCHROMATIC NAILS:  Wildfire

DESCRIPTION:  A neon yellow/green base with holographic gold and silver flakies, shimmer and microglitter with a smattering of larger holo silver and gold glitter. Glows in dark and under black light for those who have more exciting lives than me. 

COATS:  Three thin coats, and still only the tiniest bit of nail line peeks through.

Well, you had me at greeeen.  I enjoyed this polish a lot.  Neon is always so fun.  The application of this one is very smooth and kind of addicting.  I don’t even know why, as there’s not even any Starbucks in it.  And Leonardo is no where to be seen.  But I just loved putting it on my nails.  It was almost a Polish Mountain-type scenario, except I gave up after three coats.  I’m not very good at goals, let’s just say.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://fanchromaticnails.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/fanchromaticnails

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/fanchromaticnails

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ANCHOR & HEART LACQUER:  Hello Jello Hangover 

DESCRIPTION:  A linear holographic base with gold shimmer, silver holo micro shreds and an assortment of fun glitters in matte, holo and iridescent finishes

COATS:  Three thin coats on this one, although two might be okay for some. 

A legit no joke carnival celebration!  This polish is fun and festive and full of joy.  Perfect for party nails.  Or napping nails, you know, if you’re me.  Cuz parties require going outside, and going outside requires pants, so at this point I’m just gonna have to pass. And society frowns on pants-less outdoor escapades, I’m almost certain.

Under the lamps:

Macros:

Price: $12

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/anchorheartlacquer

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/anchorheartlacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/anchorheartlacquer

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LEESHA’S LACQUER:  Tequila Sunrise

DESCRIPTION:  A sunset orange to yellow thermal with a smattering of holo

COATS:  Three, although two looked pretty good

Oh, thermals, my evil friend. Picture it: me, in the floor by the air vent, with my hand in a glass of ice water, having anxiety.  And then trying to photograph it all before the thermal changed.  Honestly, there were probably about 7,397 attempts before I finally found my groove.  At that point, my reaction time between ice water, towel, and hands in the light box, was approximately NASCAR pit crew changing a set of tires plus trying to get a bee out of my car during lunch break divided by scrolling by a surprise photo of a snake coming out of a toilet on Facebook.

So here’s to at least 19 hours of my life.  Here’s the warm to cool transition:

Just the warm state:

Now just the cold state:

Macros:

Price: $10

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.leeshaslacquer.com

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/leeshaslacquer

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/leeshaslacquer 

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TOADARRIFIC VINYLS

There’s not just polish available at the Polish Pickup.  Teanna has three nail arty things to offer this month, all cocktail related and stinkin adorable!

First are the stencils:

Clearly, I’m no expert, but at least an attempt was made.  Worth half a horn toot at least.

Now here’s where the awesome photography skills kick in. Get ready!

Some cocktail decals:

These have a gorgeous iridescent finish on them, which I tried to capture in my photo. I mean, if your first thought was PROFESSIONAL, you are correct. 

Price: $5 for both the stencils and decals, sold as a combo

And finally, a large decal for your Helmer:

Same iridescent finish. The transfer film is still on this decal, but would be removed when you actually use it, so the colors really pop out.  Also, the sausage fingers are lurking.  Ew.

Price: $3/each

Linky loos:

Shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/kissingtoadlacquer

Instagram http://www.instagram.com/toadarrific_vinyls

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/toadarrificvinyls

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GUYS. We made it!  This is the real true end; you read all the way to the bottom!  Toots for you, my friend, for your perseverence or at least reading all this with just one of your eyes closed.  And now you are properly armed with a shopping list and a hoard all the polish kind of game plan.  Y’all ready to spend some money?  Cuz it’s bye bye checkbook in 3 … 2 … 1 …

Shop opens Friday, July 7 at 11am EST and will stay open until Monday, July 10 at 1159pm EST.  If you’re not setting like 17 alarms, I am var var concerned about your brain.  Click here for shopping!  And in case you didn’t read the other parts to the most ginormous blog post in all the land, here’s more things to click on: 

Part 1

Part 2

There are a few makers that will be selling polish that I did not get to feature.  Be sure to be on the lookout for what Lilypad Lacquer, Darling Diva Polish and Supernatural Lacquer has to offer as well.  I’ve seen sneak peeks, and basically you’re gonna want them too.

Lastly, let me just say THANK YOU to Sarah and Adrienne, the Polish Pickup creators (and founders of Fair Maiden Polish) for having me blog this most prestigious opportunity.  It has been beyond fun, and I’m grateful to have been chosen to share my love for nail polish and my weird little blog with so many people.  And to the makers who sent me their polishes to swatch, well how very BAD ASS are you?  I hope I’ve done them justice and that you sell a trillion bottles because of it.

Til next time …

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

BLUSH Lacquers + Crystal’s Charity Lacquers: Women’s Foundation Duo 

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Yesterday was the first day of summer, the longest day of the year.  Could be a cause for celebration, as I know there’s some girl out there shining up the Uggs and marking days off til she can pumpkin all the things.  NOT THIS LADY.  The beginning of summer means days will continually get one minute shorter until suddenly we are in the bowels of winter, and OMG, the hives are already lurking.

Ugh. Why do I torture myself by looking so far ahead?  I mean, it’s not like every day until then isn’t going to be at least 90-degrees, and I’m bound to complain mercilessly about each one of them anyway.  Cuz y’all know I don’t sweat like a lady, and regardless how terrible the word moist is, there’s really no other way to describe the situation.  Ew.

HOWEVER, I feel like some effort today.  Did y’all just scroll to the top to see what blog you were reading? I know, me too.  But it’s hard to be grumpy when good things are happening.  Cuz Crystal’s Charity Lacquers is back again and it’s time to hoard some polish!  BOOM.

Each month or so, Crystal’s Charity Lacquers chooses a charity and teams up with indie brands to create exclusive polishes to sell and help raise funds for the cause. This round, she has chosen Victoria from BLUSH Lacquers and Heather from Heather’s Hues to release some pretties to benefit the Women’s Foundation.

So get off your no-buys, ladies! A TOTAL LEGIT JUSTIFICATION-type scenario just fell into your lap like no big deal.  Lesssss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Our charity this month is the Women’s Foundation. The Women’s Foundation uses funds that are raised to address areas of concern for women: stopping violence against women, ending poverty, empowering women and ending human trafficking. 

The Women’s Foundation uses money raised to help fund emergency shelters and programs to help survivors of abuse and sex trafficking rebuild their lives. They fund life-changing programs designed especially for women to help women move out of poverty. Through these unique programs, women can learn a skilled trade, start a small business or gain work experience.

The Women’s Foundation also supports girls confidence by funding dynamic programs that engage the body, mind and spirit. They offer mentorship programs and also have programs that target at-risk girls, allowing them to explore science and technology, play sports, learn critical thinking or take on leadership roles, all in a supportive all-girl environment. These are all just a brief example of all the wonderful work this charity does. The Women’s Foundation’s mission is to help women and girls move out of violence, out of poverty and into confidence.

— Crystal Weber, Crystal’s Charity Lacquers

Well, when you put it that way … 2,477 bottles, stat.  I can’t think of a better way to spend some money today.  Maybe slightly more rationally, but then again, no one does Crazy Nail Lady quite like you.

As previously mentioned, there are two indie brands helping out this round. I only have swatches of the BLUSH Lacquers offering, but there is a link down below to another blog where you can view the swatches for Heather’s Hues.  Seriously, is there an award coming?  Cuz someone is being awfully overachieve-y today.

(Me, to be clear. )

First up is #girlpowered:

This one is a soft baby pink with peach tones and golden shimmer.  It’s such a pretty, delicate shade.  The gold glowing through gives me a case of the Grabby Fingers, I swear it.  Three coats of YUM, plus easy to apply formula, plus the most amazing brush applicator on the DADGUM PLANET!  In other words, you’re buying this.

Another angle, cuz NERD:

And now, a macro EXTRAVAGANZA!

Welp, we are officially pass-out-y.  Bring on the smelling salts!  And Leonardo, just in case.

The other half of the duo is Hear Me Roar:

This one is a magenta linear holographic with pink holo glitters, and OMG, the sparkle, the bling, the ladylike composure just OUT THE FREAKING WINDOW.  I got two smooth coats out of this one, although I could’ve done a billion cuz polishes like this make me completely not normal.  But in a very good way.  Polish Mountain, here we come!  One coat .. two coats .. th re e coa. Ts … blah, never mind.  I’ve already done two efforts today; at this point, pajamas is all that’s left.

Oh, but how about one more angle?  You know, for extra convincing.

Lastly, the macros.  Otherwise known as the prelude to the Noodle Leg Epidemic that is happening next:

Okay, fiiiiiine.  Some holo action first:

And now we’re all just unattractive puddles of goo.  Bye bye checkbook!

The round up:

In addition to this lovely duo, Heather’s Hues has a one too!  First, there’s Queen of the Castle – a soft lavender with gold shimmer, gold holo and microflakies. Then there’s BElieve in YOUrself, a light teal metallic holo with pink/violet duochrome shinmer.  I’m pretty sure you want these too, but for the lack of proof via 18,000 Excel spreadsheets and a science experiment, go check out Lacquered Mama’s review and see for yourself.  Click here!

Pre-sale for these starts Saturday, June 24 and will run until Sunday, July 9.  That’s like two weeks of panic, so be sure to set alarms so you don’t miss out.  Cuz while the polish is bueno to like the trillionth degree, it’s the charity that makes it all worthwhile.  Get on it, boo boos!

Cost for the BLUSH Lacquers polishes will be $11.75 for #girlpowered and $12.25 for Hear Me Roar. At the time of this writing, I do not have the cost for the Heather’s Hues duo, but I will update once I get it.  Polishes will be available at each respective makers’ site, and I will leave links below for you cuz I have a random burst of energy today and might as well burn a few calories to aid the skinny.

BLUSH Lacquers – click here

Heather’s Hues – click here

That’s officially three efforts for the day in case you don’t math well.  Seriously, are we in the right blog?  I’m so var var confused.

A portion of the proceeds will be donated to the Women’s Foundation through the CanadianWomen.org website.  Be sure to give it a read.  Then while you’re in a clicking mood, go ahead and join the Crystal’s Charity Lacquers Facebook group so you can get inside scoop on future donations, brand collaborations, and polish sneak peeks. DO IT. I mean it. Click here.

Okay, gang, I’m off to do some quick polishing that will most likely result in a four hour swatch fest and then subsequent napping at my desk tomorrow.  Happy Almost Friday!

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Blush Lacquers: Summer Soirée 1 Year Anniversary Collection 

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I tried to get to this blog all day yesterday, but hubby left me home by myself and I forgot how to function.  For one, food didn’t just magically appear so I was forced to put on pants and drive myself to the store.  Gah!  LAME.  Then a wasp flew into the house, where I did an extraordinary amount of cardio trying to shoo it back out.  ALSO LAME.  I’m not a whiz at math or anything, but I’m pretty sure that’s 7,427 percent more effort than is allowed on a Sunday.  Boooo.

It’s a blog heavy week again this week, which means I’ve got to stay on task as much as possible.  That’s really hard to do cuz Full House keeps coming on TV and like, couches and pajamas are everywhere.  So as soon as the blog figures out a way to write itself, I’ll just be over here getting carpal tunnel like a DADGUM CHAMPION.

My sweet friend, Victoria, with BLUSH Lacquers sent me another amazing set of polishes to share with you today.  It’s BLUSH’s one year anniversary, so naturally the collection had to be special.  And although it surprisingly doesn’t come with a side of Leonardo, this is most likely the most amazing collection of all time ever.  Legit no joke.

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OMG, the flakies!  Excuse me while I reattach my jaw to my face approximately 18,000 times.

The Summer Soireé collection is full of shimmer and iridescence and is inspired by sophisticated French parties and delicacies.  And, well, you had me at iridescence.  And French.  Not the “parties” part, though, cuz – you know – I like pajamas.

First up is Escargot, Non?:

This one has a brown-toned eggplant base with a bronze to green shifting shimmer, holo flakies and blue/green/gold shifting iridescent flakies.  IT. IS. GLORIOUS.  My swatch literally does no justice to this stunner.  Although my macros get a horn toot.  Take a look:

Did you just die?  Cuz I sure did.

Next up is Raspberry Sorbet:

This one has a raspberry pink base with a golden shimmer, holo flakies and pink/blue/purple shifting iridescent flakies.  So much pretty!  Feel like holding a tiny cappuccino?  Well this polish just begs for it.  It’s dainty and precious and Queen of England-approved.

Close up of those goodies:

Angels are singing, I swear it.

Now here’s Bonne Chance:

This one has a navy base with a bright aqua shimmer, holo flakies and purple/pink/orange shifting iridescent flakies.  I’m digging the mix in this one, man. That shimmer just glows. I’m trying to be normal over here, but I’m sensing some noodle legs lurking.

An insane display:

Who’s still upright?  Hmmmm? NOT A DADGUM ONE OF US, that’s who.

Next is Gilded Fawn:

This one has a golden taupe base with a golden/green shimmer, holo flakies and green/orange shifting iridescent flakies.  And while that’s all well and good, it’s the macro that does you in. Grab the smelling salts!  Now scroll.

Do you see that GREEEEEN?  Ugh. Our wallets have officially left the building. And our brain’s done gone somewhere.

Here’s After Hours:

This one has a plum base with a golden/green shimmer, holo flakies and gold/orange/pink/green shifting iridescent flakies. I feel like this is the point where Victoria just said EFF IT and made us all just drooling, unattractive messes.

More proof:

Tsk tsk, that woman. But also, THANK YOU.

Next up is Le Petit Macaron:

This one has a French blue base with a bright aqua to purple shimmer, holo flakies and pink/green/gold shifting iridescent flakies. HOLY MOLY! I want this one on allll the surfaces. Mine AND yours.

Now more flakie business:

LEVEL EXPERT.

Lastly, here’s Rose Gold Garden:

This one has a golden olive base with a rosy pink shimmer, holo flakies, and gold/green/orange/pink shifting iridescent flakies.  FREAKING DREAMY!  That pink shimmer is the best, most surprising part and just impossible to turn away from. Unless you don’t like pretty things. Or you have no eyes. I dunno.

Good thing we’re at the end, cuz what is breathing? What are words? What is life without drooling in a thousand tiny buckets?

In other words, BIG. PUDDLE. OF GOO.  If I wasn’t such a trophy wife, we’d all be worried.

The round up:

Every single one of these polishes was opaque in two coats.  A bit of a thicker formula, but easily managed – if you can keep yourself from passing out 17 times while applying, that is.  Victoria is the best at making every polish she does unique and infinitely beautiful, and the Summer Soireé collection is the apex.  How many you tossing in your shopping cart, then?  One, plus 27 back up bottles, at the minimum.

This collection is available now, so you’re all good to go!  Full set of 7 polishes retails for $77 and single bottles are $11.  But happiness is PRICELESS, so that point is moot.  Click away, my friends!  If there was ever justification for Crazy Nail Lady, right now would be it.  Shop link is here!

Happy 1 year anniversary, Victoria!  Thank you for making these sad white sausages look even a skosh more hand model-y than they actually are.  For that, I am eternally grateful.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

 

Blush Lacquers: Polish Pickup June 2017

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GUYS.  We’ve made it.  Officially four blog posts in a little more than 24 hours, and if there was ever a reason to have a wine cooler on a Thursday night, this here’d be it.  Plus, in a rare moment of confusion, my cat has spontaneously just sat down next to me, so before he realizes I’m not my husband and – although my fingers smell like cheeseburgers – there are no actual cheeseburgers, we’re gonna go ahead and love alllll of this in a smother-y, stalker-y kind of way.  Cuz one cannot be rational when there’s kitty cat, everywhere.

BEST DAY EVER is about to get even best-i-er.  I’ve got one last polish for the Polish Pickup to show you, and it’s such a beauty.  Victoria from Blush Lacquers has made us this:

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This is Snail Shells and Mermaid Tales, and OMG.  You’re about 2.5 seconds away from super pass-out-y, I just know it.  Grab the smelling salts and prepare for a noodle leg epidemic, cuz it’s some serious shifty business up ahead.

Y’all might’ve heard (cuz you’ve read this blog before), but the Polish Pickup theme for June is Under the Sea.  Victoria’s inspiration this time around was abalone shells.  So, get a good look at this:

Now look at this:

SERIOUSLY.  Victoria is a dadgum magician, and now we have proof.  NAILED IT doen’t even begin to describe this scenario.

Another angle.  Cuz NERD.

So this polish has a light blue base with a green/blue/purple shifting shimmer.  I tried to get a shot of the shift for you, an attempt to be a real blogger for once.  I’m not entirely sure what I accomplished, but toots on the ole horn anyway.  Cuz effort was made, which causes Starbucks if I’m not mistaken. 

An insane display of holo:

And then a macro to seal the deal:

If this somehow doesn’t end up on all your surfaces, we need to have a chat about your brain.  27 bottles, in the cart they go!

Here’s deets :

Polish Pickup FAQs – click here

Polish Pickup shop – click here

Price – $12.75

Now here’s where it gets serious.  The Polish Pickup sale opens tomorrow, June 2 at 11am EST and will run through all day Monday, June 5.  So if you can’t manage to get your priorities straight in a mere three days, well it’s a sad state of affairs for you then.  In other words, setting 17 alarms makes the most sense.  Cuz no one does Crazy Nail Lady quite like you.

Lastly, if you’d like to get involved with future theme nominations, voting and sneak peeks, be sure to join the group on Facebook.  Click here!  DO IT. I mean it. 

That’s it gang.  Everything you need to know about your DAMN GOOD FRIDAY.  Hoarding all the polish in 3 … 2 … 1 … 

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Blush Lacquers: Polish Pickup May 2017 + Facebook Group Customs 

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Hey, let’s start a new blog post at midnight cuz sleep is something for other people!

Seriously.  Sometimes my brain doesn’t understand what a good idea means, which is also the reason I ate a whole can of bean dip by myself.  Obviously, good choices don’t happen if I’m not properly supervised.  If you knew how many times hubby has to take the chips away, you might be wondering about the child he is married to.  Ugh.

So since it’s pretty late and I’m really trying to make an effort not to stay up til nigh on eternity, I’m gonna keep the rambling to a minimum.  Or that’s the plan anyway.  Sometimes I get overcome by the nail polish and then my brain goes away somewhere.

I have a couple things to show you from Blush Lacquers today that y’all are just gonna die over.  I’ll start with the POLISH EMERGENCY, so get your focus face on cuz there’s some serious business up ahead.  First up, the Polish Pickup:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

In case you didn’t read my last post on the Polish Pickup, WHY DIDN’T YOU?! is the actual question, but I’ll remind you that this month’s theme is science.  Victoria chose Botany as her inspiration and this super cool photo of a flower photographed using some sort of science-y type of UV light which brought out some cool kind of glowing fluorescence.

Or something like that.  I dunno.  I can tell you who played the Bachelor every season since 2002, though, if you’re interested.

So, look at this:

Now look at this:

Welp, I don’t hate that one bit.  Just the lovliest thing you’ve ever seen, prolly.

This has a glorious neon magenta pink base with a blue shimmer and holographic flakies, and it’s basically all your polish dreams come true.  With a Starbucks on top, for extra specialness.

A macro EXTRAVAGANZA!

Gah!  I just love how those flakies catch the light.  Distracting, to say the least.  Cuz you forgot you were reading this blog, didn’t you?  Cuz I forgot I was even writing it.

Okay, here’s where the emergency comes in.  This polish is only available in the Polish Pickup shop, which goes live tomorrow, May 5 at 11am through Monday, May 8 at 1159pm EST.  If you don’t get all your priorities sorted out over the next four days, this polish (and all 16 other polishes from a variety of brands) is gone forever.  That is not a typo.  FOREVER.  Are you properly panicked?  Well you should be.

The deets:

Retail cost $11.75

To shop, click here!

The other new stuffs coming your way tomorrow are a couple of customs made special just for the members of the Blush Beauties Facebook fan group.  Take a look at these pretties:

First up is Oopsie Daisies:

Ooooooooh!  What a little beauty!  You don’t normally see yellow with this many goodies in it, so naturally we’re all just gonna go pass out for a second.

Another angle for extra convincing:

So this one is a dusty yellow base that slightly leans green with a red-purple shimmer, blue-green flakies and holo flakies.  It has a bit of a sheer finish and my swatches are two coats, although adding a third gets it pretty opaque.  I didn’t prefer the third coat though; the yellow looked so elegant with a tiny bit of nail line peeking through.

Took these photos outside during my lunch break.  Since I had pants on, I thought I might make myself useful:

Also, I need to make mention of Victoria’s new bottles and brushes.  They’re so nice!  Especially the brush – it’s wide with a rounded tip and one stroke down the nail almost covers the whole thing.  It took about a minute to do one coat of this cuz of that dang brush.  We’s basically best frans now.

Time for drooling!

You NEED.  Right?  Right.

The other group custom is called Siren Swells:

Well, you need this one too then.  OMG, the hoarding urges!  You’re about 2.5 seconds from Crazy Nail Lady, pretty sure.

Another angle, cuz BEST BLOGGER EVER, that’s why:

So this one has an aqua-green base with a golden shimmer, gold-bronze flakies and some linear holo for extra tongue lolling.  My swatch only required two coats to opacity, and the new brush (again) made quick work of it.  The color is so comfy cozy, and GREEEEEEN, which means I lub it lots.  It’s a dire case of noodle legs, and the Ugly Ecstasy Face is in full effect.  I’m a walking pile of sex, as you might imagine.

Who else is annoyed by that hair on my pinky?  Blah.

Macros, but not for licking:

Even though you want to!  But the judgy eyes, they are everywhere.

The round up:

In order to purchase these, you gotta be a member of the Blush Beauties Facebook fan group.  So here is your list of things to do:

Join the group by clicking here

Snag the coupon code that you’ll find in the group

Head over to the Blush store by clicking here

The customs can be found as one single listing where you can select either color or the duo.  Each polish is $10 or the duo is $20 – after you apply the coupon code, that is.

Pre-order for these starts tomorrow, May 5 at 7pm EST, so if you want them I suggest you get there early.  They will be available to order just until May 26 at 1159pm EST, but if you wait that long, we need to have a chat about decisions and how to make them.  And if you show up on May 27 or after – well it’s a sad state of affairs for you, now isn’t it?

IMPORTANT RESTOCK INFO BELOW

In addition to these customs, you can pick up the shade from last quarter’s The Color Box, Blue a Fuse.  Check out this gorgeous thing:


And then all the leftover Polish Con goodies will be available as well, like Wonder Wheel:


I ❤️:


And lastly, Brooklyn:


Once the Polish Con leftovers are gone, they will not be restocked so be sure to set 17 alarms at the minimum cuz you’re gonna want every last one of these.  Legit no joke.

The full Midnight Masquerade collection, the Flower Gathering collection and Evening Sparkler will be back too, so who’s officially having the best day ever?  You, to be clear.

Okay gang, the plan’s all set!  You’ve got a shopping cart full of nail polish.  And then dishes and groceries, if there’s time.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Blush Lacquers: Girly Bits Exclusives 

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Welp.  Polish Con is over.  Somehow I managed to write 7237 blogs with just a minimum of a carpal tunnel type situation.  This is what happens when you obsess in a proper way.  THINGS GET DONE.  Granted, sometimes nothing else gets accomplished, such as chores or groceries or the general wearing of pants, although try telling me a leftover Easter candy dinner and 197 hours worth of robe isn’t a good idea.  STILL MARRIED, in case you’re curious.

It’s rained all day anyway, so the amount of motivation happening over here is only slightly alarming.  I just checked my fitness app and I’ve done a total of 132 steps in a 24-hour-period.  That is not a typo.  However, in my defense, when you sit down for a living, using your body for other activities is not as easy as expected.  If I’m up moving around at all, it’s cuz someone put a Starbucks in another room or something.

So, just checked my calendar, and it looks like another blog-heavy week is headed your way.  Which means if these posts don’t figure out a way to write themselves, I’ll be sitting on this couch for all eternity and hubby will have to just bring me stuff on his way back from the kitchen.  Cuz imma need a sandwich from time to time.  And some diabetic circulation socks, at the minimum.  Best blogger ever, is what you’re thinking.

And now: the point.  I received more pretties from one of my favorite brands, Blush Lacquers, to share with you today.   Here is a lovely duo made exclusively for the Girly Bits shop that you’re getting your hands on in 2.5 seconds.  Cuz you make good decisions, that’s why.  Take a look!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Blush Lacquers has joined the Girly Bits family, a polish brand and international stockist, so now customers from all over the world can finally hoard all the polish in a proper way.  To celebrate, Victoria has created two beautiful exclusive shades just for the Girly Bits store.  Roll your fainting couches over in case of accidental lounging, cuz it’s about to get super pass-out-y in here.

First up is Can’t Buy Me Love:

This one is a minty green scattered holographic creme with fuchsia microglitters, iridescent microflakies and a subtle blue shimmer.  And you had me at GREEN.  Isn’t this such a stunning shade?  It’s happiness, cheer and probably some magic poured into a bottle.  It’s Leonardo standing in your living room handing you a Starbucks.  It’s an entire bag of Funyuns and the house to yourself.  It’s everything you’ve ever wanted is what I’m trying to say.  If this isn’t already in your shopping cart, I question the state of your brain.

Formula was not too thick and it glided on smooth.  Two coats of perfection is all you need.

A macro EXTRAVAGANZA!

Seriously, have you ever?  NO. YOU. HAVE. NOT.

Then there’s Aisle Be Waiting:

This one has a medium grey scattered holographic base with beautiful aqua to purple shifting shimmer and silver microflakies.  It’s the perfect shade, so dainty and precious.  It just begs for a tiny cappucino and tea with the Queen, so in case y’all having snacks later, you’re already halfway there.  And that’s called effort without any effort.  Life = succeeded, so pajamas for everyone!

More macros, in case convincing is in order:

Done.  Bye bye paycheck.

The round up:

These two polishes release Sunday, April 30 at 9am EST in the Girly Bits shop.  In addition to these two, you will also find the Midnight Masquerade and Flower Gathering collection, so if you’re Canadian or International, this is the cheapest option for you.  Throw em all in the cart!  It’s the most logical next step.

If you’d like to check out my previous reviews for the other collections, here they are for easy clickin:

Midnight Masquerade

Flower Gathering

I feel like doing some over-explaining cuz I don’t know anyone who doesn’t enjoy that.  But in case you’re the type who likes explicit instruction, well then this right here is for you:

All international (non-U.S.) customers who needs a Blush fix will find everything they need from GirlyBitsCosmetics.com. 

All U.S. customers who want the Girly Bits exclusives will need to shop at GirlyBitsCosmetics.com as well.  However if you want any other Blush polish, the most economical in terms of shipping is to purchase from the Blush Etsy store by clicking here.

Some other links to click on, while you’re in the mood:

Blush Lacquers Instagram – click here

Girly Bits Instagram – click here

My Instagram – click here

A basketful of kitties – click here, just because

That’s it guys.  You made it to the end.  Thank you so much for reading all the way to the bottom.  As always, your company is appreciated; otherwise, if it wasn’t for you, I’m just a girl in here talking to herself and I’m pretty sure that’s how crazy starts.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Blush Lacquers: Polish Con Limited Edition Duo

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Back to the scene of the crime: Eureka Springs, Arkansas. One of my most favorite places in the entire world and where hubby and I got married four years ago. A town ran by hippies and full of all the tye dye you could ever want. A town where sometimes there’s pancakes but sometimes there’s not. A town where you can go in a store that just sells socks and come out with $400 worth cuz YOU’RE ON VACATION and suddenly socks with horses on them just make sense.

We came up here this weekend to celebrate our anniversary, which we’ve done almost every year since our wedding. It never gets old. We always try to do different things each time we come, although we usually end up in the fudge shop at least 97.947594% of the time.

Last night, we went on a ghost tour inside the Crescent Hotel, one of the most haunted hotels in America.  I seriously don’t know why I put myself through such torture. I mean, putting on a maxi pad in case of accidental peeing is probably not a normal thing to do.  But there I am anyway, getting my photo taken in the meat locker where they kept the dead bodies, acting like EVERYTHING IS FINE, except for all the sweating and general unattractiveness.

Tonight is our last night here, and the only thing propelling me home is the video alert from our surveillance camera showing my mother carrying 7 packages of swatch mail into my house.  Cuz even though Sundays are zero fun whatsoever due to its unfortunate proximity to Monday, the lure of nail polish gets me each and every time.

Speaking of nail polish, I have two beauties from Blush Lacquers to share with you today. Polish Con in NYC is coming up in one week, and Victoria has made this awesome limited edition duo just for the event. If y’all headed that way, then VAR VAR GOOD DAY doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario. Take a look!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

No words, just moan-y throat noises coming out.  Seriously, Victoria’s polishes give me a dire case of Ugly Ecstasy Face. Wedding anniversary number 5 is on the line here, I’m afraid. 

The inspiration for the duo is this awesome graffiti:

Basically NAILED IT.  I see this and immediately orange and blue are the two most logical choices. Victoria is one smart lady, that’s why.

First up is I ❤️:

This one has a coral base with pink micro flakie shimmer and delicate linear holo. It’s so stunning, guys!  The color is so bright, almost neon really. And application is sooooo smooth, it’s almost a Polish Mountain-type situation except I give up after just two coats cuz I’m not very good at goals. 

An undeniably amazing macro:

Told ya. This polish is legit no joke beautiful. 

The other half of the duo is Brooklyn:

This one has a blurple base with blue micro flakie shimmer and delicate linear holo. On me I felt it was more blue than blurple but blue, blurple, potatoes, french fries. Either way, it’s all good.

Another best macro ever. Cuz I’m sooooo good at blogging!

This one takes my breath away, seriously. Glowy blues have me drooling in a thousand buckets, at the minimum. 

The round up:

For all you lucky people heading to Polish Con this coming Saturday, first of all, I only hate you a tiny bit. But also, make sure you add these two beauties to your shopping list.  DO IT.  I mean it. 

Price is $9.25 each or $17.50 for the duo. Plus some tax, possibly.  Available at Polish Con in NYC on April 29, and if there’s any leftovers (Baby Jesus, are you listening?), Victoria will add them to her shop so everyone who lives in the middle of nowhere exciting can get their grabby fingers on them.  Click here and keep watch.

Headed to bed now. Gotta get up early for breakfast cuz apparently if it gets too busy, the kitchen decides to stop making pancakes just because they feel like it. I don’t know what kind of business practice that is, but who am I to argue? I give up right in the middle of stuff all the time. You don’t end up with 97 crocheted scarves the size of potholders by seeing things to end. Lazy, level EXPERT, is what I mean.  

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Blush Lacquers: Flower Gathering Collection 

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I am so far behind on my to-do list and I don’t even know how it happened. One minute it was all under control, then after I about strangled myself with my own bra last week, everything’s gone awry.  There is chaos and IT. IS. EVERYWHERE.  Either that or my laziness has finally caught up to me.  Cuz I assume not much gets done while lounging on couches.  Besides napping and getting chubby cuz SCIENCE is a big ole B sometimes.  Blah.

So now I’m sitting here trying to write 18 blog posts and swatch 97 nail polishes, PLUS! somebody informed me it was time to scoop cat poop, but basically he is WRONG.  Cuz I did it just two days ago, and I haven’t been told the minimum of 27 times yet.  Responsibilities are hard, you guys.  SO HARD.

However, some things did get accomplished.  Here’s a list of three:

1. I made some very hideous nail art (coming soon!) .. Although this isn’t entirely surprising.  Me and nail fails, well, we’s best friends.  For real, I’m not sure if Baby Jesus has more important things to do with his time, but apparently mojo for me isn’t high on the list.

2. Shaved my legs so I can continue to stay married.  However, the hoisting up and bending over and sweating in the bathtub should qualify as separate accomplished things.  Cuz when you sit down for a living, using your body for other activities is not as easy as expected.

3. I went outside and jumped on the trampoline, which also means I put on pants.  And I only peed a tiny bit, which is another miracle.  So if you’ve been doing math (cuz who isn’t? is the actual question), that’s a whooooooole lot of overachieving on my part, honestly.  In fact, laying on the couch for eons makes total sense about now.

Well, that’s a busy weekend, really.  Even though I’m swimming in swatch jobs and the blog isn’t writing itself for some reason, I got a lot done, considering.  Please tell me Starbucks is coming cuz I can’t think of any better way to celebrate all this success.  Send Leonardo too, just in case. 

While we wait, let’s get to the polish!  I have the new Flower Gathering Collection from Blush Lacquers to share with you today.  If you haven’t been ready for spring for roughly light years like me, then here, lemme fix it.  Take a look:

Look at all those pretty sausages!  Every single one of them: beauties.  Seriously, Victoria has once again captured a mood.  You’re about to spend some money, I just know it.

This collection consists of six super sparkly holographic shimmers in delicate spring shades.  It’s inspired by Victoria’s favorite poem, Flower Gathering, by Robert Frost and each polish is named after a line in the poem.  Y’all ready?  Well then lessss go!

First up is Gloaming Roaming:

This one has a soft periwinkle lavender base with a delicious blue/green shimmer and loaded with holographic flakies.  All my purple lovers just died for a second.  For real, you did.

Time for macros!

The flakies!  They got me good.

Next up is Know Me Not:

This one is a soft rosy pink with blue shimmer, loads of holographic flakies, and a ridiculous display of pretty.  Also, it’s Queen of England-approved in case you’re both having sandwiches soon.  As happens to all of us from time to time.

A macro EXTRAVAGANZA! up ahead:

You okay?  Need a rag for your forehead?  I know.  Nail polish makes you sweaty sometimes.  I get it.

Now here’s All For Me?:

This one has a soft lavender base with a pink micro flakie shimmer and more of those holographic flakies were are officially hardcore in love with.  Cuz flakies make everything better.  And prettier and skinnier too, prolly.

Grab your drool bucket:

Okay, it’s about to get suuuuuper unattractive in here.  Victoria, what are you doing to me?  Cuz I do not look good with my tongue lolling about outside my body.

This one is Faded Flowers:

This is a soft ballet slipper pink/nude with a red shimmer and holographic flakies.  The shimmer here looks more pinkish purple to me, but then again, I think I look good in 24 hours worth of robe, so what do I know really?

More macros, more drool:

You’re buying these; you already know.

Next up is Ages of a Day:

This one has a soft seafoam green base with an amazing blue shimmer and more holographic flakies.  Seriously, the flakies never end.  It’s a flakie epidemic.  No cure.

Oh well.

Are you hot, cuz I’m hot.  Someone needs to point a fan at me, stat.  Otherwise, DIVORCE.  I don’t sweat like a lady, let’s just say.

Lastly, here’s Measure of Treasure:

This one is a soft lime green with a red micro flakie shimmer and holographic flakies.  If you haven’t drooled in a thousand buckets at this point, I am var var concerned about the state of your brain.  Cuz no one does crazy nail lady quite like you.

Get ready to paint all your surfaces:

You need 27 backup bottles, at the minimum.

Now for your prize.  If you buy the entire collection (and you are), you get this little beauty for free.  Take a look at Morning Glow:

She’s got a soft mauve-y pink base with a gorgeous golden green shimmer and (you guessed it) some holographic flakies.  Since she’s a freebie, you cannot purchase her.  She is priceless princess and we shall treat her as such.

Let’s seal the deal:

Fainting couches for everyone!

The round up:

I can’t think of any better way to spend your evening than throwing all these in your shopping cart.  Honestly, you were just gonna put on sweatpants anyway – might as well be useful about it.  This collection is available now, so it doesn’t get more convenient than that.  Here’s the deets:

Price is $61.50 for the whole set, plus you get the 7th polish for free.

Single bottles are $10.25 each, but we’ve already discussed the plan (all six, darlings!) so I’m telling you this cuz I don’t know why.  Click here for shopping!  Otherwise, it’s a sad state of affairs for you.

Headed to do a couple more swatches before bed which will most likely end up a 4 hour polish party.  And then naps at the desk for me tomorrow!  HR loves that, I swear.

Later, loves!

Blush Lacquers: April 2017 Polish Pickup

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Who’s in the mood for a Black Friday-style elbow jab to the face?  NOT ME!  In fact, I steer clear of most outdoor activities.  Cuz EFFORT.  Also PANTS.  And Lazy, Level EXPERT.  I can’t even tell you the last time I went out shopping.  The idea of it makes me tired.  Buying myself clothes is a nightmare with a meltdown and a pity party on top cuz what is cute on the rack is a frumpy hobo in the dressing room.  That’s not even a typo.

However, I do buy things cuz occasionally I am forced.  Like, when I run out of underwear and laundry is a not a decision I feel committed to.  Or maybe it is my mother’s birthday and I need to have a panic attack in the middle of Bed Bath and Beyond.  But sometimes a shopping opportunity just falls in your lap – and it requires no effort, no chaos, and most importantly NO PANTS.  I’m talking about Polish Pickup.  Otherwise known as all your nail polish dreams come true, plus pajamas.  Well, if you’re me.

Polish Pickup is the best new thing.  It’s a cross between a collaboration box and a pop up shop, and a most awesome way to buy polish from several favorite indie makers all at once.  I’m so freaking excited, I’ve got my maxi pad on in case of accidental peeing.  I mean, one never knows when the mood to gleefully jump up and down will strike.  Even this comatose body forgets to sit still every once in a while.

Aside from the polish, us customers can get in on the fun from the beginning.  Each month, we all submit and vote on a theme and then the makers create polishes based on that theme.  I missed voting on the first two themes, but I’m totally tossing Ode to Leonardo in there for next time.  Cuz a polish named Gilbert Grape just makes sense.

So the party’s getting ready to start and it’s basically a polish emergency, so y’all need to focus now.  I have the Blush Lacquers offering for the month of April and you’re gonna want this all over your surfaces.  Here’s Modeled in Marble:

Told ya.  How you’re getting out of this blog without 27 bottles minimum defies allllll the logic.  Even the rocket scientists are like I dunno.

April’s theme is Famous Works of Art, and Victoria chose Gian Lorenzo Bernini’s Ecstasy of Saint Teresa as her inspiration.  Take a look at this:

Now take a look at this:

Ummmm, what?  NAILED IT doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.

This polish has a delicious grey-green base with a blue to purple shifting shimmer and these spectacular gold and holo flakies.  It’s so unique and one of the most beautiful things I ever saw.  Seen.  Have ever seen.  Ugh.  One can’t grammar at a time like this.  

Grab your drool bucket!  Now scroll:

Gah!  I just died.  I done did.

So here’s the deal.  This polish along with 17 others are in the April shop.  Shop opens Friday (today, by the time you might be reading this), April 7 at 11am EST.  You have until Monday, April 10 at midnight to shop, then every last one of these polishes are gone.  FOREVER.  As in, a sad state of affairs for you if you don’t prioritize immediately.  Are you properly panicked?  You should be.

Each polish in the shop has a variety of prices, and Modeled in Marble retails for $11.50.  You can buy one polish or all 18 of them – it’s up to you – and shipping will only be $3.  Why, that’s practically free!  And we love free things, oh yes we do.  Click here for shopping!

To get in on the action, or for updates and sneak peeks, join the Polish Pickup Facebook group by clicking here.  For real, DO IT.  I’m serious.

Congratulations on your good decision.

Later, loves!