Benefit #1 of being married to a chef:

When you ask (politely but in all caps in case there’s a misunderstanding) WHY ISN’T THERE ANYTHING CAKE-Y IN THIS HOUSE?! and he gets up and goes make something cake-y.  He does that all the time, just whips up something like that out of stuff we have stashed in our cabinets.  Like, I don’t immediately think CAKE! when I see an unopened carton of Egg Nog leftover from the holidays.  My first thought is GROSS, but where I act like someone who just stepped on a slug in the kitchen at 1 in the morning, he sees opportunity.  Substitute Egg Nog for the butter or actual eggs or something along that line, and voila!  A cake is born.

Benefit #1 of being married to me:

Everything one day past the expiration date listed on the package has immediately turned to poison.  Like, the day of the expiration date, completely fine.  Next day, it will straight up kill you now.  Hubby has thrown out many things that he would, in his expert opinion, still use, but since he doesn’t want to be accused of murder,  he now just goes straight to the trash can.

I may have a skosh of the hypochondria.  I dunno.  I have a friend who got food poisoning from eating ham that his grandmother ate right before she died.  Sooooo … your grandma ate the ham and then she died?  A coincidence, you don’t think?  Honestly, I don’t know how the rest of the story went cuz I immediately got the hives and had to go lay down.  But seriously.  This is why I’m crazy.

I got off on a tangent.  My point is I have a husband who makes me cake.  Even my bad days are still pretty good.

Let’s talk polish!  I received the 4-piece Conversation Hearts collection from Nailed It! nail polish to review for you today.  It’s pink, purple and full of sparkle, so if you’re into all that, then today’s your lucky day.  See:

So blingy!  Who doesn’t love a massive dose of holo?  (Seriously, who?  Cuz we need to talk.)  It’s all your favorite Valentine’s colors, perfect for manis full of hearts, cupids, roses, black clouds, Darth Vader.  I mean, this is YOUR day.  Celebrate however.

First up is Let’s Kiss:

Okay, this one is precious.  Yes?  Yes.  I love a sweet little pink.  And it has just enough darkness in it to make my skin tone appear less see-thru, which is all I ever want out of a polish.  Well, except for gloop.  But gloop is a given.  No, we save gloop for people who like to make extra food noises with their mouths.  Or who use the word suckle in their everyday vocabulary.  Gloop is your punishment for being a bad person.

Macro time!

Then I did some nail art:

I kept it pretty simple, but I love that heart pattern. It’s on the Uber Chic Beauty Love & Marriage 03 plate if you’re curious. I’ve used this plate a ton lately.  For real, if you’re into hearts, flowers and romance, you probably lead a wayyyy more interesting life than me.  But also, this plate is perfect for you.

Next up is Be Mine:

Doh!  It’s purple!  It’s not an in your face purple, like PURPLE! with jazz hands but more just purple with like some sweatpants on.  But sweatpants from Victoria’s Secret, so it’s okay.

Look at all that glitter up close:

Okay, there might be a touch of jazz hands.

Here’s the nail art I did:

Meh.  I mean, it’s not terrible but I’m not gonna win any awards with it or anything.  Some of my hearts turned out a bit funky.  As hearts tend to do.  

Used the Uber Chic Beauty Love & Marriage 03 plate (surprise!), and this red hot bombshell down below.

Here’s XOXO:

Ahhh, now.  We’re in love with this one aren’t we?  She’s red with a bit of pink, cute and flirty but also kinda bossy. She’s who you wish you were back in 5th grade when you tried out for cheerleading but refused to show school spirit, cuz duh, EMBARRASSING.  For real, it was all kinds of uncomfortable crickets in there.  Those judges … being so judgy.  It’s as if they knew there was a spelling bee nearby missing a 10-year-old.

Time for drooling!

Okay, pull it together.  Now scroll right past this:

Ugh.  What.  This looked so much cooler in my head.  This nail art = DO. NOT. RECOMMEND.

Last one is Me & You:

Erlack!  Holo much?  It’s like a base of holo with a bit of holo and a holo topper on top.  A holo EXTRAVAGANZA!

You need this, is what I’m saying.  Cuz anything this holographic practically begs for it.  It knows you’re looking, it sees your mouth hanging open all unattractive-like.  Put this one in your basket then, cuz lolling tongues are not a good look for anyone.

Had to show you this under the lamps:

Do you hear angels?  Prolly.

Not bad nail art:

The contract between that much bling and some pretty black lace stamping is almost too much to bear.  Someone bring me a chair, stat.  And Leonardo DiCaprio, just to be safe.

I used the Uber Chic Beauty Love & Marriage 01 plate this time.  Another favorite!

The round up:

Okay, gang.  You’re buying this collection, just so you know.  Here’s the deets:

Entire set $30

Single polish $8.50

Plus, the first 10 people to order all 4 pieces will receive a bottle of Bye Girl latex barrier for free.  Whyyyyy, we love free things!  (Oh yes we do.)

Annnnnnnddddd THEN!  I have a coupon code.  Use dianna15 for 15% off your order.  I know!  Who’s having the best day ever?

Click here to shop!

Alright, you’ve read to the bottom.  Internet high fives for you!  Thanks for hanging out as always.  Go buy yourself some pretties.  You deserve it.

Later, loves!