Sounds I like:

1. The toilet shutting off after you’ve flushed.  Cuz after four years of just jiggling the handle, hubby has finally completed a DIY project.  I no longer have to inform guests of proper protocol of the sad state of affairs in our bathroom, or leave a note for the housekeeper that the toilet is even more broken than ever (due to failed DIY attempt #1).  NOPE.  All fixed.  Who’s a fancy lady now?  (ME, to be clear.)

2. Your cat’s purring up close after he accidentally mistakes your lap for something he loves.  This happened to me twice yesterday, and I posted a picture in yesterday’s blog as proof.  I’m not certain what he was doing cuddling up to me, but regardless, I am var var concerned about his brain.  He jumped off about 2.5 seconds later, cuz either he realized what he’d done or he sensed a hug was coming.  He no likee the hugs.

3. Silence.  Unless it’s after dark and I am alone.  Cuz that’s when the hauntings start.  I can sit in a house with no TV on, windows open and a nice breeze blowing through, joyously minding my own business.  But as soon as I hear a random noise from somewhere back there, well, basically it’s time to move.  I mean, I know there ain’t no one going in that laundry room for fun.  In other words:  GHOST.  There is no other logic for that one.

4. Bananas inside someone’s mouth. Oh wait, that’s just a punishment for bad people.  Cuz whatever kind of torture you’re into, listening to the smack of a banana being mooshed around with a tongue is enough to make me confess to anything.  That is not a typo.  Blech.

Now that I’ve grossed everyone out good and proper, it’s time for nail polish.  I have some of the most beautiful things you’ll ever see on the blog today.  Ready to hand over your wallet and look suuuuuuper unattractive in the process?  Get your smelling salts handy, then, and take a look at these: 

Told ya.  I hope you’ve locked yourself in a room in case of accidental divorce cuz there’s only so much sexy to go around while holding a drool bucket.  It’s best to keep that private just in case.

This is the Multichrome Madness group custom quad made special for the members of the Multichrome Madness Facebook group.  One of my favorite brands, Top Shelf Lacquer, is in the spotlight for April, and Amy has seriously blown me away with what she came up with.  Seriously, NAILED IT doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.  You like holo and glitter and shifty little dreamboats?  Well, today is your lucky day.

First up is Tequila Mockingbird:

Do you hear angels? I hear angels.  How stinkin gorgeous is this?  (Very.)

This one is a blue to purple shifter with the most delicious square holo microglitters.  As a person with a touch of the OCD, squares soothe my soul like nothing else.  Cuz how you gonna line up round things all snug and Tetris-style?  As an expert organizer, I can tell you it’s nigh on impossible.  Even as a child, I knew.  I mean, I couldn’t kick a soccer ball to save my life, but if you needed your cart of groceries organized, I was a dadgum champion.  So, basically same thing, is what I mean.

Under the lamps, the purple comes out much better:

Macros of all the goodies:

Did you just die?  Cuz I sure did.

Next is Help Me Straighten Mai Tai:

In case you were unaware, Top Shelf Lacquers names their polishes after drinks and drink-related things.  It’s all very clever.  The polishes in this quad were named and voted on by members of the Multichrome Madness group, and lemme just say there are some smarty pants in that group.  Not me though cuz my brain was like WINE COOLER! and then had itself a little seat in the back.  Apparently sipping on one drink for three hours straight doesn’t bode well for the expertise.  Plus, I need 18 hours minimum to come up with genius things.  That is why blogging is hard.

So this one is a purple to red to bronze shifter with those same square holo microglitters.  You should see the situation in this room right now.  Ugly ecstasy face sounds about right.  Blah.

Under the lamps, it’s a much more brighter purple:

A square glitter EXTRAVAGANZA!:

Mercy, that’s pretty.

Here’s Schnapp To It:

Oh my goodness, will the drooling ever end?

NO.

This one is a super shifter that goes from green to blue to purple with the occasional flash of red. More glitters too cuz there’s literally no end to this.  All the glitters, all over my body.  Or just on my nails cuz SOCIETY with their judgy eyes.

I think this one is my favorite.  The colors in it are fabulous, and the shift on it is unreal.  The green, it got me.  It got me good, guys.

Under the lamps, purple says hi:

Now for macros:

I won’t lie; I kinda want to lick that one.  Cuz I’d be surprised if it didn’t taste just like a Jolly Rancher.  I mean, it’s probably more poison-y than expected, but who’s to know for sure?  Being normal is zero fun sometimes.  

Lastly, here’s Now Watch Me Sip…My Chardon-Nay Nay:

This one is another super shifter that goes between pink, orange, gold and green with more square holo microglitters.  Seriously, words have left me.  It’s moan-y throat noises from here on out and I have no idea how the rest of this blog is getting done.

Uhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnn.  See?  Ugh.

Aside from all that though, it’s probably one of the best named polishes of all time.  You’re buying it for that reason.  But also cuz it’s pretty.

Under the lamps, the pink tone has its jazz hands on:

You’re about to spend some money, I can already tell.

The round up:

This quad is available now, but you gotta be a member of the Multichrome Madness Facebook fan group to get it.  Here’s your to-do list:

Click here to join the group, then head over to the Top Shelf Lacquer store and throw every last one of these in your cart.  Click here to shop.  DO IT.  I mean it.

Single bottles retail for $12 for full size or $8.50 for 8ml polish shots

Full set of 4 costs $46 for full size or $32 for polish shots

The quad is only available until April 30, so if you immediately thought POLISH EMERGENCY, you are correct.

While you’re in the clicking mood, join the Top Shelf Lacquer Facebook fan group as well.  Stay up to date on sales, specials, group customs, sneak peeks and general coolness.  Click here please, then toot your own horn cuz you make good decisions.

Also, check out all the Instagrams!  Top Shelf Lacquer can be found here, Multichrome Madness can be found here, your favorite blogger in all the land can be found here.

In addition, this set is available in two alternative finishes – a straight multichrome or a holo version.  These are not part of the group custom but will be available on the website if you’re not a fan a glitter.  Although WHY AREN’T YOU?! is the actual question. 

Welp, you’ve made it to the end so high fives for you then.  I know sometimes my blog posts are wordy and ridiculous, and make zero sense most of the time.  So I appreciate that you’ve taken time out of your day to come say hi and die over nail polish with me.  You’re the best and I lub you lots.

Later, loves!