I’m about 17 hours away from mashed potatoes, and I. CAN’T. WAIT.  I don’t even care about the turkey, or even any of the desserts for that matter.  I want one big plate of mashed potatoes and a bunch of quiet time.  This is my Thanksgiving wish.

Well, that and some Black Friday nail polish.  I got my list of discount codes and my shopping hand ready.  Are you prepared?  Did you make a spreadsheet?  There is never a time like right now to let your dork flag fly.  Without that spreadsheet, you are adrift at sea.  And you do not want that, trust me.  Cuz I’ve been snorkeling in Mexico without a lifejacket, and THAT is no bueno.

Here, let me help you.  I received the gorgeous Glam Polish Wizardly Ways collection to share with you today, and I hope to Baby Jesus you have a chair to sit in and one hand on your britches – cuz these are about to blow you away.  Get ready:

Line #1 on your spreadsheet.  Write it down.

Can you believe these beauties actually exist?  They are mesmerizing and magical and jaw dropping, drool-inducing, speech-stealing dreamboats.  I don’t know how I can even attempt eloquence at this point, because half my brain is a bumbling idiot.  Uhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnn.

See?  DUMB.  I will carry on the best I can, as I feel a dire responsibility to make sure you have the best Black Friday experience possible.  At home, in pajamas, where you belong.  No sense getting poked in the throat from a crazy person, if you ask me.  (And you did, otherwise, why are you here?)

This collection is inspired by wizards in film and literature.  First one up is Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them:

Well this is starting out well.  You already want them all, don’t you?  I could literally delete the rest of this blog post, and it wouldn’t even matter.  You’re sucked in, you’re done, you’re dead.  This was the very first one I pulled out of the mailer, and I had to take a second to catch my breath.  Purple lovers, pay attention!

Base on this one is a dusty violet, and I almost love it as much as I love those shifting iridescent glitters. Almost.  It’s hard to ignore anything that calls itself iridescent but when you are glitter, it’s nigh on impossible.  

Macros to love:

And then I did some nail art.  Here’s a pretty simple design using some marbled zig zags from What’s Up Nails:

I used a matte top coat so those glitters really stand out.  I love the look of this.  I love everything about it.  Is there a horn handy cuz I’m about to toot it.  Sometimes I make decent nail art, that’s why.

Next is The Dark Crystal:

I’m already fearing the possibility of sounding repetitive cuz what else can I say that hasn’t already been said?  Maybe ho hum pigs bum, but after that, nothing.  The glitters in this one look like they are on fire, just glowy and glorious.  Are you still upright?  Prolly not.  An old timey fainting couch would be appropriate right about now.  Preferably ones that come with cute boys holding big leaf fans and trays of grapes.  I don’t know about you, but why pass out if you can’t enjoy it?

Base on this one is a plum jelly, although I think it pulls more red-toned on me.  Regardless, it’s lovely and that’s really all you need to know.

Macro time!

An attempt at more nail art:

I don’t hate this, but my stamping skills could use some work.  However, I would like to point out how amazing this gold stamping polish is.  It’s from Powder Perfect and one of the best I’ve ever used. And I’ve used a lot, with varying degrees of failure.

Now here’s Oz the Great and Powerful:

Y’all know this one has a special place in my heart.  Cuz, GREEN.  I’ll never get tired of green.  That’s how you know it’s true love. Not the obsessive, stalking-like behavior that I assumed before.

The orange part of the iridescent glitters really shows up well against the green.  This fact makes me the happiest of all things happy, as orange is my second runner up favorite color.  Fall orange, specifically.  I could wear this combo forever.  I’m not even going to joke about it cuz that’s how serious my love is.  But let’s move on real quick before something stupid slips out (as it is wont to do).

You know what’s next:

Dreamy, right?  I want it all over my body, HR policies notwithstanding.

(And there’s that stupid thing you were waiting for.)

Let’s do nail art:

Who doesn’t love this? (Crazy people.)  Kind of reminds me of Formula One racing stripes. I used Night Owl Lacquer’s Jack-o-Lantern, which is a really gorgeous orange.  Squeeeee!

Okay. FOCUS.  Next up is Chamber of Secrets:

OMG, did you just die?  Cuz I sure did.  What a gorgeous bright and fiery shade.  I have a feeling this is going to be the favorite of the bunch for a lot of people.  There’s just something about turquoise and orange, isn’t there?  A bit summery, which is what I need so much.  Cuz it’s 44-degrees outside right now, dreary and hideous.  Would it kill someone to make it June again?  Okay, thanks.

It’s sunlight on the Caribbean Sea.  Check out these macros:

Told ya.  Someone better be taking me on a vacation soon.  Hubby or Leonardo DiCaprio, it makes no difference.

Here’s the nail art I did on this one:

Went very simple using some chevrons I got from Polished Vino, and I think it turned out nice.  The black looks good against the turquoise.  Excellent contrast work on my part, in case you weren’t sure.  Gimme that horn again.  Toot toot!

Next up is this moody beauty, Dungeons & Dragons:

If you were waiting for something vampy for Christmas, this be it.  What a sexy little thing!  Dark and mysterious; a hot little potato.

Mmmmm, potatoes. (Okay, clearly I have a problem.)

Base on this one is a deep indigo blue/purple and full of the same color shifting iridescent glitters.  I think it looks like a midnight sun or some kind of brilliant galaxy.  It’s stunning just like all the rest of them, and if you don’t buy this collection, well then you are WRONG.

Take a look at these:

I could get lost in there, it’s just too pretty.  Dark polish lovers, this one’s for you.

Here’s the nail art I came up with:

I don’t remember where these circle swirl vinyls came from, but I thought this was the perfect thing to do on top of this polish.  I used Indigo Bananas Synonym Bun, one of my most favorite copper holographic polishes – and look how well it matched those glitters.  I made a masterpiece, guys!  Go me!

Last polish in the collection is perhaps the most beautiful, An Unexpected Journey:

Like fairy wings!  Or a winter sunrise.  I really am going to need that fainting couch now (and the cute boy with the grapes, to be clear).

This one is set in a clear base, so you can absolutely swipe this on top of a colored polish.  The darker the polish, the more shifty the glitters are.  However, I wanted to see what it would do over naked nails.  Turns out, MAGIC.  Two coats of this and it’s pretty opaque.  No sponging required; just swipe on like normal. It’s effortless, and that’s all we really want in life, isn’t it?  Well, pajamas too, but that’s a given.

Last of the macros:

Ugh.  So perfect.  Here’s more nail art:

I stamped on a lovely lace image using the Moyra Lacelove plate I got from Cosette Nail Shop.  If you don’t own any Moyra plates, fix that stat.  They are some of my favorites.  

The round up:

I’m posting this blog early so the collection isn’t available yet. But you only have to wait until 3pm EST tomorrow to snag your pretties.  You’ll need to set your alarm so you won’t forget.  Here’s a list of why:

1)  Each polish is a smooooooth two coater and a true pleasure to apply

2)  If you’re one of the first 75 people to place an order of $50 or more, you get a free full sized Limited Edition polish

3)  I’m the boss of you

Now who’s gonna argue with any of that?

Other promotions in effect:

Glitter For Breakfast & L-O-V-E  Save $3 total when purchasing both of these Glam Group Exclusives together (ends 11/28 1159pm EST; must be a member of the fan group to get the coupon code – link below)

Wizardly Ways Collection  Save 10% when purchasing the full collection (no code required; ends 11/28 1159pm EST) – and in case, you’ve already forgotten, this entire blog post was about Wizardly Ways.  I know, it’s okay.  Iridescent glitter does it to me too.  Brain = goodbye.

Black Friday Sale  Save 10-55% off selected shades (already marked down; no code required; while supplies last)

For full terms and conditions of the black friday sale and promotions, please join/visit the Glam Polish Fans Facebook group (click here).

Well that’s it guys.  You are officially the most informed person in the world, all because you read to the very bottom of this blog post.  Kudos and high fives for you, then.  And a Starbucks for me.  Okay, thanks.

Later, loves!