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Overheard several female co-workers discussing all their old sports injuries the other day. I stumbled upon the conversation completely by accident as I was out walking around doing actual work-related things – which for someone who sits down for a living, is quite an accomplishment all by itself. But there was talks of softballs-to-the-knee and basketball jumps gone awry and it really got me thinking: Why can’t I ever be cool, even for just a little bit? Cuz I am the girl who:
1. Cries while trying to blow bubbles in the pool during swimming lessons;
2. Attempts to kick a ball as it rolls toward me at 0.1827 miles per hour and somehow misses the dadgum thing;
3. Signs up for softball without a clear understanding of what softball is, sees it requires gloves and balls and actual athletic inclinations, and then quits immediately because NO;
4. Joins the track team in high school just so I could take a picture for the yearbook and then spends the rest of the season faking period cramps.
And it doesn’t get any better as an adult. I sprained my ankle while wearing boots on a trampoline, cried around 327 strangers while attempting to snorkel AND gave myself bursitis after approximately 3 minutes of aerobics. Seriously y’all, this is what happens when all you do is collect stamps with matching stationery and have 67 pen pals as a child. A lame ass aerobics injury. WHO WANTS MY LIFE THEN? Damn near no one pretttty sure.
So, good thing I got this polish thing on lock. Cuz I got new pretties to share with you today! Colors by Llarowe is now being sold exclusively through the Color4Nails website, and to celebrate the transition, Leah Ann made us this gorgeous, luscious trio:
It’s a Noodle Leg Epidemic, in case you didn’t know. Cuz you don’t just go tossing in a bunch of holo and shimmer and DADGUM FLAKIES and expect anything normal to happen next. In fact, you might oughta lock yourself in a room alone cuz if y’all gonna get unattactive, get unattactive in private. There’s not much sexy to go around whilst drooling in a thousand buckets. TRUST ME, I checked.
Okay, now FOCUS. There’s a slight Polish Emergency happening, and wasting time is your least logical scenario. Quick rundown of colors, then I’ll meet you at the bottom. Here we go!
A DIFFERENT DIMENSION
DESCRIPTION: A silver prismatic holographic with a yellow/pink/blue/green shift
OPACITY: An almost one-coater, but I did two due to invisible naked spots that only I could see (superpowers!)
DON’T YOU FORGET ABOUT ME
DESCRIPTION: A magenta/blue/pink multichrome shifter with color changing flakies, shimmer and scattered holo
OPACITY: Two coats plus glossy top coat
A NEW ERA
DESCRIPTION: A turquoise scattered holo creme with original Unicorn Pee pigment
OPACITY: Two coats plus glossy top coat
Formula on all three were, as usual, consistently good. Very smooth, easy to apply, basically effortless to like the trillionth degree. As mentioned, the silver one was almost a one coater, so it’s perfect for those who have other things to do beside paint nails for 17 hours straight like me. Pfffft. You and your fancy life.
However, my favorite of the bunch is the green one. Aside from all the Unicorn Pee madness, it’s a gloriously pretty green and where there is green there is also me picking my jaw off the floor over and over and over again. Why I’m not skinny after all that, we’ll NEVER freaking know.
THE ROUND UP
See what I mean by drooling, though? It’s Drooling, Level EXPERT, at the minimum.
Here’s all the shopping deets you’ll ever need to know:
Price: $13 each
This trio is available now, so hooray for no waiting! Whatever excuse you had for not shopping today is hereby declared officially NULL and VOID.
Now here’s where that Polish Emergency thing comes in. These are only available until March 18. So yeah, only a slight emergency at this point, but distractions happen – about 27,000 separate times for me – so being prepared in a timely fashion only makes sense. In other words, GO NOW. Overpours may be listed later, but who’s getting risky with nail polish? CERTAINLY NOT YOU.
Where to buy: https://color4nails.com
Bonus clicking opportunities! Connect with Colors by Llarowe:
More blogs later, maybe even another one tonight. I’m behind, y’all! Who’s surprised? (No one, at all, EVER.)
Later, loves!
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Snacks On Rotation 