You remember that time when I told everyone how much I dislike nail polish, and then I went on and on for the next 18 months continuing to dislike nail polish?  Well guess who spent the past few weeks owning about 102 bottles of nail polish?  (If you just said, Who?, well aren’t you the pretty one?)  I guess you might say something’s changed.  Why it has changed I can only speculate.  But here is my best guess:  YouTube.  Did you know you can just sit around for five hours on a Sunday watching ladies paint their fingernails?  Like, you can completely stop vacuuming, grocery shopping, or functioning in society altogether, and just sit on the couch and watch nail polishing tutorials.  And then like every other time in my life, what do I end up doing with all this pent up inspiration?  I buy 102 bottles of nail polish AND a display rack to put them in.  Duh.

Here’s my Ipsy:

Ah, another hot pink lipstick.  This is the Shea Moisture lip crayon in the color Sarah.  Nothing against it, but you know how it goes.  Why get something unique and exciting when you can have just one more hot pink lipstick, that’s my motto.  I did use it for the sake of the review, though.  And it was okay.  I wore it all day and found it not to be particularly moisturizing or long lasting.  And the hot pink was as hot pink as ever.  I’m keeping it, but barely.  I’m sure I’ll change my mind by the end of this post.

Next is the treStique eyeshadow crayon in Aspen Pine, a wonderful, glorious GREEN!  Finally I don’t get a champagne shade.  Ipsy was sending out four different colors and they were all pretty neutral except for the green, and because my life always does the opposite of what I wish for, I just knew I wouldn’t get the green.  But I did.  For once something goes my way.  All those years of the Bachelor picking the wrong Bachelorette has come to fruition.  My dues have been paid.  I have earned that green eyeshadow.

It’s a pretty dark green so blending it took a minute.  I added a bit of lighter green to the center to brighten things up a bit, and I loved the way it turned out.  I posted a pic on Instagram if you’d like to go see (you do) – and while you’re there, go ahead and click “follow” because 1,000 other people did and they’re pretty much the smartest people in the entire world.

You know how much I love my masks.  This Dr. Brandt Pores No More Vacuum Cleaner mask is perfect for me.  It’s supposed to suck out all your blackheads and I can’t think of anything more better than that.  Now I went ahead and tried it a few days ago.  It’s a very light silky feeling mask that goes on clear then dries to a very sheer milky white.  You almost can’t tell you have it on, which works great if you’re prone to receiving unexpected guests as soon as you declare it Skincare Sunday.  Because you know that happened to me.  I applied this goopy, drippy dark brown honey mask and a mere 2.5 seconds later some neighbor kid rang my doorbell telling me their softball flew into my backyard.  Then I did that over-explaining thing I tend to do, how it was Skincare Sunday and I just put on a mask and I’m so sorry for looking hideous but I’m old and wrinkly and hahaha, that’s what happens when you’re 40 and oopsie, look a bit of mask goop is dripping down my jaw onto my neck but don’t be scared because it’s vegan and organic and smells like pumpkin cocoa, you can sniff my face if you want.  Welllll, what kid plays softball in 90-degree heat?  This all could’ve been avoided had they been on their iPad and eating Cheetos like a normal person.

But back to the mask.  Sadly, I didn’t think it performed a miracle.  I was expecting all my pores to be gone, but I suppose that’s unrealistic anyway.  My face felt very clean, though, and my serum and moisturizer went on pretty smooth.  Perhaps with continued use, I would be able to tell a difference.  If I ever buy the full size, I’ll be sure to let you know.

Got another Smashbox Photo Finish primer.  This is one of my favorites, so I was happy to get a repeat.  Feel free to read what I said about it last year by clicking here.  Or I can just tell you it’s a hardcore silicone primer, feels a bit oily and a bit silky at the same time, but holds back my t-zone oil the best of any primer I’ve used.  It doesn’t stop it completely, but I can eke out a couple extra hours with this primer before I need to blot.  Is that a big deal?  Ask anyone with an oily face and a very hectic schedule – blotting your face is annoying and takes up too much time.  May be just 30 seconds, but still.

Last item in the box is a set of BioRepublic sheet masks in Aloe Rescue, Cucumber Breeze, and Green Tea Detox.  I’ve mentioned a few times before that I don’t like the sheet mask format.  I mean, I will use all three but I won’t enjoy them whatsoever.  First of all, they’re weird.  Actually, they’re mostly creepy with a skosh of weird.  Yes, they’re convenient, perfect for travel, yada yada yada.  But I don’t want to look into a mirror and see a serial killer staring back at me.  I just don’t.  Give me a goopy, drippy dark brown honey mask over a sheet mask any day.

However, because I am a good person and an even better blogger, here are the preferred list of uses for each mask:

ALOE RESCUE – Soothes dry skin, perfect for after sun

CUCUMBER BREEZE – Soothes and calms stressed skin, tightens pores

GREEN TEA DETOX – Reduces excess sebum (oil), blemishes and imperfections

I will admit I could use all but the Aloe Rescue.  I don’t have dry skin, and I don’t go outside unless I’ve been forced or bribed with Starbucks.  Trust me, promises of a Starbucks will get you just about anything.  Scooping cat poop, taking out the trash, pulling those scary looking mushrooms that pop up in your flower bed.  Yes, Starbucks is a very powerful bargaining tool.  So is a Sephora gift card.  You know, in case you have any errands that needs run.

That’s it for today.  Thanks for reading to the very bottom.  Internet high fives for everyone!