Boxycharm | May 2014

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Do you know how when you are eating peanut M&Ms, and one rolls out of your fingers on its way to your mouth and you try to catch it about a billion times before it plunges to its sad little death in the exact spot where you keep your dirty high heel bottoms for 9 hours everyday?

Well that happened to me today.  It was the most exercise I’ve gotten in quite awhile.

Anyway, here’s my Boxycharm box:

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Kind of liking it.  I will use everything, so that’s a plus.  Let’s review.

The Illume hand creme has such pretty packaging, and that is primarily the only reason why I love it.  Cuz seriously, if you think about it, hand lotion is kind of boring.  One tube lasts for eons and eons.  So unless you’re a habitual lotion user, you will own this tube for 15 years.  They sent me the Thai Lily scent, and it smells pretty good.  Although I saw on their site they also have a coconut mango – I would have loved that scent more.  Food smells get me everytime.  Floral scents come in second place, and then random inanimate object scents (like Desert Oasis or Cool Breeze – because none of that has a smell) are dead last.  In fact, you will never see me in Yankee Candle buying a pack of Morning Dew tealights.  Because what does morning dew smell like?  Nothing.  It smells like nothing.

One thing I wasn’t particularly thrilled to get was the Ferro Cosmetic pink “Fabuki” brush.  Is that a gimmicky name or am I being an asshole?  Well, regardless, someone in the marketing meeting came up with the genius idea to name this pink Kabuki a Fabuki most likely because it is “fabulous” and everyone needs to know immediately.  Okay, yes, I’m being an asshole.

Having said all that, it is very soft and I will find a use for it.  I applied some powder on my face over the weekend and I liked the texture very much.  Probably won’t announce to my friends that I own a “Fabuki” brush, but whatever.

Got a lipstick from Mirabelle, and it is purple.  Okay, technically it’s more of a magenta, but man is it bright.  I wore it to work last week, and I was very self conscious all day.  The color, although not red, might as well be red.  It is super obvious and verging on prostitute-y.  Can’t say I don’t love it, though, but I’ll probably only pull this one out for special events.  However, can’t say I have very many special events occuring in my life.  So either I’ll own this tube for 15 years (along with the hand lotion), or I’m wearing purple lipstick to your baby shower.

Just sayin.

And now for one of those products you know you need but do not enjoy getting as a gift:  nail polish remover.  They’re like the socks-for-Christmas of the makeup world.  I got mine in the form of Lauren B. Beauty nail wipes.  There really isn’t a whole lot to say here.  They remove your nail polish.  Am I missing any other pertinent info?  Let’s see: they wipe away your nail polish, they get rid of your nail polish, you use them to take off your nail polish.  Yep, covered everything.  Moving right along.

Last item in the box are two pouches of hair conditioning treatment cream from Novex.  They sent me the Argan oil version as well as the olive oil one.  I used the Argan pouch a few days ago because I was feeling like my hair needed a little TLC.  The instructions said to leave this on your hair for 25 minutes using a shower cap.  25 minutes?!  That’s a whole lotta lookin ridiculous if you ask me.  But I was a good kid and did as I was told.  Was it worth it?  Wellllllll … it didn’t make my hair fall out or anything, so that’s always a bonus.  Did I have ultra luxurious supermodel wind machine hair?  Not quite.  Still was frizzy as hell once I dried it.  My hair is stupid.  I give up.

Actually, if I would just stop all the shenanigans and go back to my Carol’s Daughter hair mask instead, everything will work itself out.  Cuz that stuff is legit.

I’m done for now.  Except I just remembered I subscribe to approximately a billion boxes, and I forgot one.   So instead of having just 3 more to review, I now have 4.  Not complaining, but this is hard work guys.  Like SO. HARD.   Let’s do a nap.

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