Good news, guys! It’s not fall yet, which means it’s also not winter, which means I can behave like a normal person for at least one more day. If the entire world just breathed a massive sigh of relief, well, that sounds about right.
On the flip side, I’m sitting out in the car trying to write a damn blog, but keep getting distracted by my own sweat bead mustache. It’s a little warm today, you might say. And I don’t sweat like a lady, but we’ve been through this before. How I’ve managed to stay married, I don’t even know.
But cool weather is lurking, and I’m about 18 tubes of hives cream away from losing it. Seriously, who’s in the mood for giant sweaters, brown grass, and sunshine that takes a dadgum vacay? NOT THIS LADY!
Ohhhh, but the fall nail polish! Well, we all like those. Take a look at what LJ with All Mixed Up Lacquers sent over:
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Yes, yes and more yes! There’s holo, there’s flakies, there’s tongues lolling about everywhere! For real, if you ain’t 27 levels of drool-y right now, I am var var concerned about your brain. And if fall could be anywhere near this amazing, wellll, we can subtract maybe one tube of the hives cream. Cuz baby steps, y’all. Baby steps.
This is the Touch of Magic Collection, a set of seven jelly dreamboats full of microflakies, scattered holographic glitter and two shades of chameleon chrome flakes. You tossing every last one of these in the cart, then? OF COURSE YOU ARE. Cuz you’s a decisioning kinda lady, that’s why.
Quick rundown of colors for you! LJ said I can describe them in whatever way I please, so just be aware a bunch of stupid stuff is about to come out. On the plus side, a HAND MODEL!-type extravaganza is happening in 3 .. 2 .. 1 ..
CABIN IN THE FOREST
MY CLEVER DESCRIPTION is a milk chocolate brown, which surprises no one. Don’t even ask how much the words not food, not food, not food is running through my brain right now. The sheer amount of NOT licking my fingers over here is downright superhuman.
MY EVEN MORE CLEVER DESCRIPTION is a candy apple red, cuz it’s not quite RED red, but slightly PINK-ish red, but with a touch of Jolly Rancher, and so we want like 18,000 bottles.
GLITTERY PUMPKIN GUTS
MY “SHOULD’VE BEEN A POLISH DESCRIBER” DESCRIPTION is a butterscotch-y, caramel-y, orange-ish kinda color that looks like it should come equipped with a napkin and a spoon. I’m not even ashamed I just said that.
MY DESCRIPTION? Greeeeeeeen! I mean, you’ve read this blog before, right?
BIBBIDI-BOBBIDI BLUE, B****
MY VERY-OBVIOUS DESCRIPTION: Well, blue. As in the vivid, royal variety. An “accidentally on all your surfaces” kinda blue. As far as blues go, it’s my favoritest.
POWER OF THE STONES
MY GOOD TRY BUT NO THANK YOU DESCRIPTION started out as just “purple” but then I noticed LJ called it amethyst and well, I’m not sure if we’re in some kinda contest now, but I’m pretty sure she won this round. DAMMMMIT.
MY LAST DESCRIPTION is quite possibly my saddest attempt. Guys, this one is grey. But grey with an “e” not gray with an “a” so we can all pretend we’re just a little bit more fancy. Worth half a horn toot, at least?
THE ROUND UP
First of all, we have learned I am not to be trusted when given the freedom to describe my own colors. I AM NOT GOOD AT THAT JOB. However, in my defense, it’s hard to be clever when half my brain is trying to hold my mouth closed. Otherwise, drool falls out, which causes divorce if I’m not mistaken.
But secondly, you’re buying this collection. There’s no way you’re not. After all the carpal tunneling I’ve done for you, it’s the least you can do. Here’s deets:
Full set of 7 polishes: $58/full size or $48/mini size
Single bottles: $8.75/full size or $7.25/mini size
An alarm-setting opportunity! These beauties release Friday (tomorrow), September 15 at 2pm EST and you shall be first in line. My favorites are the red and green, although this point is moot. All seven, and in the cart they go! Weeee!
Where to buy: https://www.allmixeduplacquers.com/
The linky loos! Connect with AMUL:
Off to do some swatching, then more blogging tomorrow. Come back and see!
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