I feel like I haven’t done a Buying Stuff post in light years.  But trust me when I say there’s been stuff being bought, like an embarrassing amount.  I mean, if there’s a day that goes by without a UPS box sitting on my porch, someone needs to call the authorities cuz a crime has happened in my neighborhood.

So let’s get started.  After wasting miles and miles of toilet paper, I finally decided to do this:

It’s the Vera Mona Color Switch Solo and you can wipe the eyeshadow off your brushes with it and simultaneously save the planet.  It truly is a magical little tool.  And handy too – sometimes I just don’t have the time to root around in my brush cup looking for something particular.  I just take the brush I was already using, swipe the bristles around the mesh trap and voila!  Clean brush to use again.  It’s the lazy person’s (i.e., ME) best friend.

And because you’ll be saving billions of trees in the process, you can pat yourself on the back with a Sephora gift card.  There, doesn’t that feel good?

Wanna see something pretty?  Look below:

Can you stand it?  Ugh.  It’s the Chanel Camelia de Plumes highlighter and it’s too pretty to actually use.  Like literally I’ve used it maybe 4 or 5 times then felt really guilty about it so I’ve put it away.  It’s practically an art piece with all that leafy design on top (technical term, obviously).  It is a limited edition and probably not even available anymore except on Amazon or eBay.  But I wanted to show you anyway because it’s simply too lovely not to share.  The color is a glorious mix of silver and gold, and if you don’t feel like a queen when holding/using/owning this, then you’re doing life wrong.

Now wanna see something ugly?  Look below:

I know, right?  It’s the Marc Jacobs nail polish in Lux (a chartreuse yellow), and it’s so verging on hideous that it’s practically cool.  You know how male models can walk down the runway with a fanny pack on, and all of sudden you need a fanny pack like nobody’s business?  Well, it’s that kind of cool.  Except sadly my fanny pack would be less Chanel embossed leather and more Target-nylon-from-the-camping-aisle.  But still.

Anyway, this color caught my eye because of it’s rare ugliness.  Y’all know I don’t like nail polish.  I barely buy it and wearing it from one week to the next is a crapshoot.  So the lone fact that I bought nail polish and in THIS color speaks a thousand words.  I absolutely loved it.  It’s the most unique thing in my (albeit small) nail polish collection, and I don’t regret buying it for a second.

Then I bought this darling thing:

Is this too much beauty in one post for you?  Everyone doing okay – heart rates behaving normally?  Cuz this Tom Ford blush in Love Lust about gives me palpitations.  If you’ve heard from other (more knowledgeable) people that Tom Ford blushes are beautiful and worth it – believe them.  Highly pigmented, natural looking and luminous.  It’s what cherub cheeks are made of.  And if I have an extra $57 laying around, I’m buying me another one.  However, how often does an extra $57 lay around at my house?  Not very.  I write a beauty blog.  I’m not sure what else you expect.

The below happened because Nordstrom couldn’t just SHUT UP about their damn mascara coupon:

It was a Buy 2 Get 1 Free coupon, and I literally could not NOT take advantage.  Who doesn’t want something for free? (Crazy people.) And if I don’t cash in on it, what does that say about me as a person other than being really, really bad at math?  Cuz free is free, even if you have to spend $60 to get it.

First one is the Trish McEvoy Lash Curling mascara.  I wanted to give this one a try since I didn’t own any Trish McEvoy products, and even though you might assume I own all the products of all time everywhere, sadly that isn’t the case.  I mean, I am currently on my journey to own all the things but it’s going to take a lifetime at the very least.  That’s okay though.  Why be obsessed if you can’t do it proper?

But back to the mascara.  This is one of those tubing mascaras, the kind that forms little tubes around your eyelashes.  I’ll be honest when I say what is the point of tubing technology?  Does it make things more voluminous?  Or make your eyelashes touch your eyebrows?  Well, not for me it doesn’t.  It was just an okay find for me.  It does remove very easily, so the fact I don’t lose eyelashes in the process is enough motivation to make me use this product.

The Dolce & Gabbana Secret Eyes mascara fared better.  It is a lengthening version and it does alright.  I mean, don’t go expecting falsie-status or anything, but I don’t think you’ll hate it.  However, mascara is such a personal thing – one works for one doesn’t work for another.  Although if you tell me you don’t enjoy the YSL Babydoll mascara or the Charlotte Tilbury Full Fat Lashes one, then obviously you are WRONG.  But other than those two, I get it.

So this one gives decent length, separates and fans out lashes, but to get volume you’re gonna have to swipe on about 3 coats.  Luckily this didn’t cause a clumping fiasco otherwise I’d have to trade my morning Starbucks run with pushing a stick pin between my lashes and manually, tediously separating them.  Risking the safety of my eyeball isn’t always the best idea at 6:30 in the morning.  But then again, nothing sounds particularly awesome at 6:30 in the morning.  Aside from that, don’t make me choose between eyelashes and Starbucks.  What is the point of the Constitution if I can’t have both?  I ask you: WHAT. IS. THE. POINT.

My favorite of the three is the Burberry Curve Lash.  It takes the least amount of effort to make an impact.  The brush is small and does a pretty good job of volumizing.  Length is about standard, but I’ve come to the conclusion that fat lashes are better than tall ones anyway.  I wouldn’t say it curls them any better than other mascaras, but what do I want in a $30 mascara – a fecking miracle?  (Yes.)

Last thing I bought are the Gerard Cosmetics Jaclyn Hill lip thingies:

If you don’t know who Jaclyn Hill is, it’s clear you don’t spend enough time on YouTube watching makeup tutorials, which in that case I can only assume your life is much more exciting than mine.  I mean, I’ve been reading the same 200-page book for roughly 3 months now because I keep using all my free time on YouTube.  I should really have more responsibilities in life.  If it wasn’t for the fact I have a full time job, I’d probably be winning in the Couch Pajamas Olympics event (but failing at the Cheetos-slash-Little Debbie Cake Resistance Program).

Well anyway – Jaclyn Hill.  She is a very popular makeup artist on YouTube and she has teamed up with Gerard Cosmetics to develop her own colors of lip gloss and lipstick.  I already own one of her lip glosses (called Rose Hill, a beautiful rosy pink) so this lip gloss in Buttercream and these lipsticks in 1995 (brown) and Buttercup (pink) complete the collection.  I absolutely love these products.  The lip glosses are very pigmented, which I prefer in a lip gloss.  Super shiny, not terribly sticky (or not annoyingly sticky).  If I had to pick my least favorite, though, it would be the 1995 lipstick.  It’s very much a Kylie Jenner-esque shade and I don’t always think it looks good on me.  But it looks good on loads of other people.  Which happens to me a lot with lipstick.  Skin tone can be such a bitch sometime.

Welp, that’s it for today.  I have two box reviews to finish out the month and if my math is correct, I should be able to fit them in with one day to spare.  If I can be a proper blogger and focus my attentions, that is.  I get very distracted by lounging.

Bye!