Monthly Archives: April 2017

Blush Lacquers: Polish Con Limited Edition Duo

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Back to the scene of the crime: Eureka Springs, Arkansas. One of my most favorite places in the entire world and where hubby and I got married four years ago. A town ran by hippies and full of all the tye dye you could ever want. A town where sometimes there’s pancakes but sometimes there’s not. A town where you can go in a store that just sells socks and come out with $400 worth cuz YOU’RE ON VACATION and suddenly socks with horses on them just make sense.

We came up here this weekend to celebrate our anniversary, which we’ve done almost every year since our wedding. It never gets old. We always try to do different things each time we come, although we usually end up in the fudge shop at least 97.947594% of the time.

Last night, we went on a ghost tour inside the Crescent Hotel, one of the most haunted hotels in America.  I seriously don’t know why I put myself through such torture. I mean, putting on a maxi pad in case of accidental peeing is probably not a normal thing to do.  But there I am anyway, getting my photo taken in the meat locker where they kept the dead bodies, acting like EVERYTHING IS FINE, except for all the sweating and general unattractiveness.

Tonight is our last night here, and the only thing propelling me home is the video alert from our surveillance camera showing my mother carrying 7 packages of swatch mail into my house.  Cuz even though Sundays are zero fun whatsoever due to its unfortunate proximity to Monday, the lure of nail polish gets me each and every time.

Speaking of nail polish, I have two beauties from Blush Lacquers to share with you today. Polish Con in NYC is coming up in one week, and Victoria has made this awesome limited edition duo just for the event. If y’all headed that way, then VAR VAR GOOD DAY doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario. Take a look!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

No words, just moan-y throat noises coming out.  Seriously, Victoria’s polishes give me a dire case of Ugly Ecstasy Face. Wedding anniversary number 5 is on the line here, I’m afraid. 

The inspiration for the duo is this awesome graffiti:

Basically NAILED IT.  I see this and immediately orange and blue are the two most logical choices. Victoria is one smart lady, that’s why.

First up is I ❤️:

This one has a coral base with pink micro flakie shimmer and delicate linear holo. It’s so stunning, guys!  The color is so bright, almost neon really. And application is sooooo smooth, it’s almost a Polish Mountain-type situation except I give up after just two coats cuz I’m not very good at goals. 

An undeniably amazing macro:

Told ya. This polish is legit no joke beautiful. 

The other half of the duo is Brooklyn:

This one has a blurple base with blue micro flakie shimmer and delicate linear holo. On me I felt it was more blue than blurple but blue, blurple, potatoes, french fries. Either way, it’s all good.

Another best macro ever. Cuz I’m sooooo good at blogging!

This one takes my breath away, seriously. Glowy blues have me drooling in a thousand buckets, at the minimum. 

The round up:

For all you lucky people heading to Polish Con this coming Saturday, first of all, I only hate you a tiny bit. But also, make sure you add these two beauties to your shopping list.  DO IT.  I mean it. 

Price is $9.25 each or $17.50 for the duo. Plus some tax, possibly.  Available at Polish Con in NYC on April 29, and if there’s any leftovers (Baby Jesus, are you listening?), Victoria will add them to her shop so everyone who lives in the middle of nowhere exciting can get their grabby fingers on them.  Click here and keep watch.

Headed to bed now. Gotta get up early for breakfast cuz apparently if it gets too busy, the kitchen decides to stop making pancakes just because they feel like it. I don’t know what kind of business practice that is, but who am I to argue? I give up right in the middle of stuff all the time. You don’t end up with 97 crocheted scarves the size of potholders by seeing things to end. Lazy, level EXPERT, is what I mean.  

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Glisten & Glow: The 5 Buroughs Collection (plus two Polish Con extras!)

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Four years ago today, hubby was late to his own wedding.  And the fact I almost married my brother seems sooooo much less alarming in comparison.  On April 20, 2013, things weren’t organized well, let’s just say. 

Listen, I suppose this is what happens when you buy the cheap package.  You get a wedding march that starts playing with zero warning whatsoever; you get a coordinator who shoves your just-finished bouquet in your hands WHILE you are walking down the aisle, and you get a preacher who thinks the brother who is giving you away is actually the man you’re about to pledge your life to.  I mean, a little research ahead of time would’ve worked wonders in this scenario.  Maybe a note on a napkin about how if the groom is missing up front, it’s probably not time to start a dadgum wedding yet?  Like, at the minimum, at least.

Regardless, I’m walking and smiling with all eyes on me.  I’m oblivious to the fact my husband isn’t in the room.  Although I’m quite aware of the door right over there that leads to a secret underground moonshine tunnel, cuz when you’re having a hillbilly wedding, what else would you expect?

The preacher has a little twinkle in his eye as he begins the ceremony.  My brother is looking a skosh awkward, and honestly at this point, I just want cake.  There are horrified eyes everywhere.  The vibe in the room is less joyous occasion, more train wreck but with candles.  And still, I stand there smiling, one of just two people who has no idea what is going on.

Eventually, the preacher figures it out and I’m sent back out of the room so I can re-walk down the aisle and pretend I’m having a never-before-seen magical moment.  Completely normal situation – or at least in my life, it is.  Cuz if something’s gotta be awkward, the Universe just gives a big swift shove to my back.  AND THERE I AM.  Most likely with stupid words coming out and high-fiving my way out of the nightmare.

What I’m trying to say is, today is my wedding anniversary.  I’ve managed to stay married an entire four years, despite the ridiculous amount of robe on display.  I’d say I got pretty lucky, cuz if I’m forced to walk back and forth twice through a room, the only acceptable reason would be if hubby was standing at the end of it.  Happy anniversary, my love!

While we all wipe the tears away, let’s talk polish!  I have lots of pretty things from Glisten & Glow to show you today, including the gorgeous 5 Boroughs Collection as well as a couple of Polish Con limited releases.  Y’all need to get on your focus faces cuz it’s about to get suuuuuuper duper pass-out-y in here.  Let’s go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

First up is the most time crucial, the two Polish Con releases.  Take a look:

Oh so pretty!  Every single one of you are drooling all over these in the most unattractive way possible.  Hope you’ve locked yourself in a room so you can be drool-y in private. Cuz Ugly Ecstasy Face causes divorce if I’m not mistaken.

Here’s A Raisin to Believe:

This one is a dark vampy purple-toned burgundy holographic with added pops of red holo microglitter.  It’s a collaboration shade between Glisten & Glow and beauty blogger Nicole with Hello Miss Niki.  It’s also going in your shopping cart, just so you know.

Macro time!

Isn’t that one of the prettiest purples you’ve ever saw?  Seen?  You’ve ever seen?  Ugh.  One can’t grammar at a time like this.

This polish will be releasing at Polish Con in New York City on April 29 but for all us sad souls who live in the middle of where nothing exciting ever happens, we get to purchase this beauty online on May 5.  It will launch at 9pm EST, so make sure you’ve got Post-It notes on all your surfaces.

Some nail art I did:

And I actually kinda love it!  Let’s revel in whatever amazing thing is happening right now.  Cuz a nail fail is lurking, I feel it.

I used the new Lina Feeling Shapely 09 plate for this design.  Plus, I gradient stamped, which means effort was involved, which means naps for everyone!

Next up is NYC is My Jam:

This one is a berry pink holographic loaded with purple and blue holo microglitters and a dusting of silver holo and copper shimmer.  Only one batch of this polish is being made and will be sold at Polish Con; however, if there are any leftovers, Jill will put them on the website on May 5.

In other words, we’re all buying tickets to Polish Con cuz sitting around while others stuff their bags full of Glisten & Glow is just for the crazy people.

An actual pretty dang good macro:

The blue glitters got me.  They got me good, guys.

More not hideous nail art:

That’s two in a row in case math is hard.  

I used the new Lina Make Your Mark 04 plate, and made some girly skulls.  Very simple design, but stinkin’ adorable!  Toots on the ole horn for me, then.

Also debuting at Polish Con is The 5 Buroughs Collection, a set of 5 beautiful holographic shimmery shades inspired by the five boroughs of New York.  Take a look at these:

Did you just die?  Cuz I sure did.  You’re about to spend some money, I just know it.

First up is Manis in Manhattan:

This one is a dusty purple based mauve holographic with a strong copper shimmer and a dusting of red and silver holo microglitters.  Went on in two fabulous, quick coats.  Perfect for those who have actual shit to do, unlike me who just lays on couches.

Lolling tongues, up ahead:

Gah!  Seriously, we’re never gonna make it to the end of this blog if I keep dying every 15 seconds.

The nail art:

Another one I don’t hate.  And I used the Lina Make Your Mark 04 plate again, cuz when I love something, I love it hardcore.  In a smothering way, as one tends to do.

Next up is Beatboxing in the Bronx:

This one is an olive green holographic with added pink and blue shimmers and a dusting of gold flakies and gold holo microglitters.  Naturally, this is my favorite cuz wherever there is green, there is me trying to reattach my jaw to my face.

We are no longer upright:

Told ya.  Those shimmers are legit gorgeous.  I want this all over my body, except I won’t, cuz SOCIETY.  The judgy eyes are everywhere.

More effort was made here:

Hope there’s a Starbucks coming cuz the sheer amount of nail art happening right now is downright inspirational.  Send Leonardo, too, just in case.

Used the Lina Make Your Mark 04 plate for the billionth time.  More gradient stamping using pink and gold, a little play off those shimmers.  It’s as if I thought this one through or something.  Or maybe the old me isn’t even here right now.  Perhaps I’ve been kidnapped cuz that seems more logical.

Here’s Quick Step in Queens:

This one is a medium grey creme-based holographic loaded with blue shimmers and a very light dusting of gold flakies.  I love shades like this cuz they always look so good against my pale skin tone.  Anything to make the fingers appear less sausage-y.  And in case of random hand modeling scenarios, 27 backup bottles is a super good idea.

You can see the goodies much better here:

Proof I occasionally make cute things:

This might be my favorite one!  Plus, every bit of this is Glisten & Glow products – cuz Jill’s cremes double as stamping polishes.  I’ve used Little Black Dress and ATV in Aruba (the pink) for this design, plus that dadgum Lina Make Your Mark 04 plate again.  Honestly, why obsess if you can’t do it properly?

Next is Brunch in Brooklyn:

This one is a light pink holographic with light pink holo microglitters and a dusting of blue and gold shimmers.  How precious is this shade?  So elegant and dainty.  It simply begs for a tiny cappucino or like, tea with the Queen, as happens to all of us from time to time.

An insane display of pretty:

Figured this one needed 18 pounds of jewelry:

I gave up after only four pieces.  I’m not good at goals, let’s just say.

I’m not even going to tell you which plate I used cuz I’m certain you already know.  After typing out Lina Make Your Mark 04 plate about 18,000 times, not much else can be expected out of me, anyway.

Lastly, here’s Selfies in Staten Island:

This one is a nude holographic loaded with copper, bronze and gold shimmers with a light dusting of silver holo microglitters.  If you like lots of extra holo effect, you’ll definitely want this one.  I can’t think of one decent reason why not.  Perhaps you have no eyes, or you have a black soul.  But after that, NOTHING.

Let’s seal the deal:

DONE.  In the cart, they go!

Here’s some super simple nail art:

Used a different plate, the Lina Feeling Shapely 09 on this one, which means I just ended this blog with a big ole exclamation point.  How’s that for Best Bogger Ever?  And in that case, I’ll take kudos and accolades and a Visa gift card, you know, if y’all not busy.
The round up:

This collection will be available at Polish Con in New York City on April 29, then will be re-released online on May 5 at 9pm EST.  Be sure to get your hands on them, so setting 17 alarms at the minimum sounds right.  Click here for shopping, then sit back, relax, and stalk the mailman.  Cuz no one does crazy nail lady quite like you.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Flirtin’: Polish Con Limited Edition + Say I Do Collection 

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I’m behind again.  The blogs are piling up, and I’m over here watching Full House reruns like responsibilities are things for other people.  I mean, I literally just sat here putting Doritos in my mouth without even looking at them first cuz BRAIN FUNCTION: OUT THE WINDOW.  Gah!  What about the poison ones, then?!  Now that my wits have returned, I’m pretty sure hypochondria starts in roughly 2.5 seconds.  And then I shall wait for death for 197 hours at the minimum cuz I am the most ridiculous person on the planet.

Being me is hard, you guys. SO. HARD.

Since we’re in a bit of a time crunch and I’ve already wasted 18 hours writing one paragraph, let’s jump into some polish.  I received a couple of swatch packs from Flirtin‘ to review for you today.  I’ve got 3 out of 6 polishes from the Say I Do spring collection as well as their Polish Con exclusive shade.  Engage: Shopping Hand cuz you’re about to spend some money, I just know it.  Let’s take a look:

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

First up is the most time sensitive, the Polish Con exclusive.  Here’s Brooklyn’s Bombshell:

First of all, if you’re one of the lucky ones going to Polish Con in New York City this year, I only hate you just a tiny bit.  I can’t plan things for shit, so naturally I chose a wedding date four years ago that is really super inconvenient right about now.  Guess I’ll take an anniversary trip instead.  UGH.

Anyway, this is Sham’s take on a glimmering New York skyline and the infamous Brooklyn Bridge.  The base is a delicious turquoise creme filled with a dusting of holo and some blue fleck things.  Which is a technical term obviously, cuz I’m SO GOOD AT BLOGGING.

Under the lamps:

You die!

This was opaque in two coats, which is typical of most of Sham’s polishes.  It’s such a pretty shade for the season, and those of you heading to Polish Con need to stop by Flirtin’s table and toss a bottle in your basket.  And some back up bottles in case you lick all over the first one.  As happens from time to time.

If you live close to NYC and didn’t know about Polish Con, click here for info and tickets.  Happening next weekend, April 29.  Just follow the huge crowd of crazy people holding giant shopping bags and a thousand drool buckets.

Next is Flirtin’s spring 2017 collection called Say I Do:

Sham decided on a bridal theme for this season, and for real, who wants every last one of these?  (You, to be clear.)  I love these soft and soothing shades – they’re perfect in every way.  In the cart they go!

First up is Something Blue:

This one has a denim blue base filled with a dusting of holographic glitter.  See how less sausage-y it makes my fingers look? That means we lub it lots, and now we can’t turn our back on it even if there’s a naked Leonardo holding a Starbucks in the other room.

Just kidding.  I mean, I may do stupid things (cuz POISON DORITOS, if you’ll recall), but when it comes to Leonardo, I am 27 kinds of serious.  Serious, but with a drool problem.  A SEX MACHINE, clearly.

Nail art I did:

I don’t hate these!  Let’s celebrate this brief moment of mojo.

Used the Lina 4 Seasons – Summer 01 plate and lots and lots of magic.

Next up is To Have & To Hold:

This one has a soft sage green base with holo glitters galore.  It’s very very springy, and probably delicious if we were locked in a room by ourselves away from judgy eyes.

Check out this macro:

Gah!  It’s super pass-out-y.

Don’t look at these:

I made wallpaper nails.  Blah.  Sometimes when I do nails, my brain goes away somewhere.  And then bad things happen in a stamping retaliation scenario sort of way.

Used the layered floral image from the Uber Chic Beauty 13-03 plate in case you’re curious.  (You’re not.)  Moving on!

Lastly, here’s Just Married:

This is a soft peachy coral shade, inspired by the sunset.  See those red bits in there?  And that gold shimmer?  And all the tongues, lolling?  Yep, this polish has suddenly made us all suuuuuuuper unattractive.  Cuz there’s only so much sexy to go around while your mouth is unattached from your body.

Kinda okay nail art:

I mean, I’ve done worse right?  And I actually attempted some reverse stamping, which means EFFORT was involved, which means I’m getting back in pajamas cuz I’ve had a var var hard day.

Used the Lina 4 Seasons – Spring 01 plate in case recreations are in order.

The round up:

As I mentioned before, the Say I Do collection is available now, since getting this blog written took approximately eons with light years and eternities on top.  Here’s the deets:

Collection consists of 6 shades, and each bottle retails for $8

In addition, Sham is offering a special deal for brides.  If you order one of the six polishes, you may mail in a swatch of one of your wedding colors and place an order for a custom formulated polish.  Cuz matchy matchy is less hobo-y and seems to be the most appropriate direction to go for a wedding.  But what do I know, really?  I’m still wearing pants with a stapled-back-together hem, so I’m not the best source for fashion advice.  Anyway, if you’re interested in a custom, click here to order.

If you’re just a regular person (i.e., crazy nail lady) just looking for more polish to hoard, click here instead.  Then sit back, relax and stalk the mailman.  Cuz it’s the most logical response at this point.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

MDJ Creations: April 2017 Restock (and a few newbies!)

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Today’s post is a big one.  Not sure what you had planned for the day, but calling in sick might make the most sense.  Cuz you ain’t getting out of this blog without at least a carpal tunnel-type situation.  But also your brain may stop holding your mouth closed, and lolling tongues amongst co-workers is usually some sort of HR violation.  Drool buckets = NOT APPROVED.  And judgy eyes are everywhere.  Blah.

By the time you finish all this, you might’ve died about 18 times from all the pretty, anyway, so staying home seems appropriate.  Impromptu vacation for you then!  Pajamas for everyone!  Also, best blogger ever (with her impeccable timing).  Toot toot!

Let’s get this drool party started!  I have loads of polishes from MDJ Creations that have recently been restocked.  Since this is somewhat kinda an emergency – one shade has already sold out since I started writing (as y’all know it takes me like 18 years to get the dang thing written) – we’re gonna get right into the polish with very little chit chat.  Cuz if I waste too much time, it’s a sad state of affairs for all of us.  Engage:  Shopping Hand.  Now lessss go!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

First up is Hope Begins:

This one has been around for a while, but now she’s back and still so lovely.  Holo holo everywhere, and in the cart she goes!  Cuz her’s a pretty lady, that’s why.

Aside from all that, this polish is a charity one, and 100% of the proceeds go to benefit Naomi’s Village, an orphanage in Kenya.  Y’all know how much you love to buy polish plus donate to good causes with one tiny click.  Today’s your lucky day then, cuz you’re about to do a whoooooooole lotta fabulous right about now.

Also, this one has a dusty antique holographic pink base with some delicious coppery amber undertones.  You want it, oh yes you do.

Next up is the 7-piece Multichromatic Flakie Holo Toppers collection.  Previously, this was just a 5-piece, but Melissa added two new ones for this restock.  And I can see why – they’re STUNNING.  Gonna do my rundown of colors then I’ll meet you underneath.

Something Magnetic (new):

This one shifts through magenta, amber, and gold with flashes of copper, green and teal.  Jaw dropping, right?  Make sure you scroll through the rest of these in private.  Cuz Ugly Ecstasy Face is a dire thing.

A macro EXTRAVAGANZA!:

Something Fantastic (new):

This one is a fiery amber gold that shifts to bronze with flashes of copper and red.  If you kinda passed out for a second, well then you’d be correct.  Cuz what choice did you have really?  I mean, if Leonardo was standing in your living room handing you a Starbucks, would you continue to be normal and upright and whatnot?  The answer to that question is always NO.

More macros for loving:

The rest of this collection are the restocks, first of which is Something Majestic:

This one is a purple, violet, magenta, amber, gold, chartreuse, teal, green, and blue flakie.  Basically all the colors. And happiness.  Lots and lots of happiness.

An insane display of flakie business:

Next is Something Electric:

This one is electric blue, cobalt, royal purple, violet and magenta with flashes of gold, copper and teal.  Seriously, who’s tired of flakies right now?  NOT A DADGUM SOUL.  Flakies make everything better.  World problems?  Throw some flakies on it.

A galaxy of loveliness:

Now here’s Something Volcanic:

This one is a pink, amber, copper, gold, chartreuse, teal, violet and blue flakie.  I’m about 2.5 seconds from sticking my fingers in people’s faces, but SOCIETY says no.  Suprisingly, strangers don’t wanna look at mah nails! quite as much as expected.

Are we super unattractive and drool-y yet?  Well, just in case not, here’s lemme fix it:

Next up is Something Metallic:

This one is gold, copper and bronze with flashes of green, silver and teal.  Want, want and NEED; that’s your new motto.

Are you hot?  Cuz I’m hot.  And sweaty, which causes divorce if I’m not mistaken.  I don’t sweat like a lady, let’s just say.

Lastly, here’s Something Aquatic:

This one is an electric blue and purple, amber, teal, turquoise, and rich green flakie.   See that jackpot flakie on my ring finger?  I kinda wanna eat that one.  Also, someone needs to save me from me.

A macro to seal the deal:

You’re buying all those, just so you know.

I put all these flakie toppers on my naked nails – no undies – and got decent coverage in three layers.  However, over black they are next level ridiculous.  Seriously, you might need some smelling salts handy; they are super pass-out-y.

This next one is a new shade called DaVinci – and it’s beautiful and stunning and sparkly and fabulous – and SOLD OUT cuz of course it is.  It’ll be restocked at some point, though, so consider this your sneak peek.

This one is a dark teal with gold and bronze flakies and holo for extra drool factor.  It’s amazing guys.  Next time it comes around, who’s first in line then?  (You, to be clear.)

EDITED:  About two seconds after this post went live, Melissa announced a restock of this shade at 5pm CST TODAY (April 17).  This is the most important thing you’ll do all day, in case you’re making a list. Set alarms!

A macros for funsies:

The counterpart to DaVinci is Michelangelo:

This one has a pale turquoise base with bronze flakies and a bit of holo.  It’s a restock that sold out pretty quickly in the past.  At the time I am typing this, it’s still available.  A polish emergency is what I’m saying.

Will the macros ever end?

NO.

Lastly, this is the Come Alive Collection, a 4-piece sparkle-fest with two restocks and two newbies.

First up is Vitality (new):

This one is a rose golden bronze, one of the most rose gold shades Melissa’s ever made.  And for that reason alone, you’re buying one bottle of this plus 27 back up bottles in case of accidental painting of all the surfaces.  Oh, and there’s flakies and holo in there, too.  DEAD.

A macro:

Next is Humility (new):

This one is silver with gold flakies and holo.  And a cat hair hanging off my pinky.  Seems about right.

Now here’s Purity (restock):

This one is a silvery white with gold flakies and more holo and drool.

Is your tongue lolling about outside your body?  MINE TOO!  Here’s a macro:

Lastly, here’s Unity (restock):

This one is a taupe nude flakie with holo, the most dainty of the bunch and Queen of England-approved in case you need to hold tiny sandwiches later.

Last macro, and then we all go lay down for a bit.  Cuz drooling in a thousand buckets is var var hard work.

The round up:

I know I said I didn’t have time for much chit chat, but nail polish just happens sometimes, and the brain goes away somewhere.

But are you ready to have the best day ever?  Click here for shopping, then!  In addition to all these restocks, there’s a 4-piece multichrome flakie crelly collection and their new Smooth Finish fast dry top coat, of which I just threw like 18 bottles in my cart cuz you don’t get to Crazy Nail Lady by being reasonable.

EDITED:  Don’t forget, DaVinci is back in stock at 5pm CST today (April 17). Hopefully you’ve got Post-It notes on all your surfaces. 

Thanks for hanging out today.  It’s going to be a blog-heavy week this week, so hope you’ve planned accordingly.  Pajamas all day, at the minimum.  And lounging on couches, but not in a sexy way.

Later, loves!

• SUPER DUPER PRESS SAMPLES •

Night Owl Lacquer: Light & Bright Collection 

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Someone found a dead bat in their salad last week, and this is why I eat chips.  I mean, if there was ever a reason to justify an entire bag of Funyuns and a whole lotta private time, this would be it.  Cuz no one ever got rabies from Funyuns.  No one got skinny either, but that is beside the point.

In other food related news, hubby and I were splitting a donut in the car after work and my half was sitting on a napkin on his leg.  Then he moved half an inch (because he doesn’t love me, probably) and my donut fell onto the floor where nail polish peelies and weird ends of french fries (you know, poison) go to die.  It was seriously like a scene from the saddest movie you ever saw.  I tried super hard not to cry and hubby felt so terrible because – of course! – he got to eat his half of the donut, with extra moan-y food noises and everything.  But now I get a pony so I guess it all worked out.

Aside from all that, it’s the weekend.  What I lack in donut, I make up in happiness.  It’s hard to be sad when I can have schnapps in my coffee for two days straight.  And 48 hours worth of pajamas.  Hooray!

To celebrate, let’s look at pretty things!  I have the new Light & Bright collection from Night Owl Lacquer to share with you today. It’s neon season, so naturally you’re gonna want every last one of these.  Cuz no one does crazy nail lady quite like you!  Take a look:

My eyes, my eyes!  Seriously, how in love are you right now?  Like super hardcore, bordering on unhealthy, maybe?  I mean, it’s the only logical reaction, pretty sure.

This collection contains six gorgeous cremes plus four awesome glitter toppers – that’s ten whole polishes in case you don’t math well.  We’ll look at the toppers later; the cremes already have their jazz hands on.  Lessssss go!  Here’s a rundown of all the colors, in rainbow order cuz you don’t get to OCD, Level EXPERT by doing things in a stupid way.

First up is Persist, a light neon pink crème:

Next is Inspire, a neon coral crème:

This is Imagine, a light neon yellow crème:

Drool break!

Now, FOCUS.

Here’s Wish, a light neon green crème:

This one is Dream, a light neon blue crème:

Lastly, here’s Believe, a light neon purple crème:

These neons are delicious!  The formula on each is a two coat dreamboat, goes on smooth and levels out all by itself.  Consistently good across the board and jaw droppingly pretty.  I don’t know what you’ve got going on neon-wise at your house, but every last one of these is going in the shopping cart cuz that’s how this thing works.  I show you pretty things, and then you die a little.  After that, you buy 27 backup bottles in case of accidental painting of all the surfaces.

As mentioned already – but we’ve all drooled in a thousand buckets since then – Lindsay has added four sparkly toppers.  Take a look at these:

Gah!  You should see the situation is this room right now.  Ugly ectasy face sounds about right.

First up is It’s All Rainbows & Unicorns, layered on top of Persist:

This topper has a clear base packed full of various sizes of crystal rainbow shifting flakies.  Ugh, did someone say iridescence?  I’m officially a puddle of goo.  Bye bye.

Next is Sunshine, layered on top of Inspire:

Sunshine has a clear base full of gold galaxy holo glitters.  It is sparkly and blingy and a complete driving hazard.  Seriously, the curbs come out of nowhere with this one. 

This is Moonlight, layered on top of Imagine:

How am I still upright?  The sheer amount of perseverence on display right now is downright superhuman.  Fainting couches for everyone!  And cute boys holding leaf fans.  I mean, as long as we’re making a list.

Imagine is a clear base full of silver galaxy holo glitters.  I’m about 2.5 seconds from sticking my fingers in peoples’ faces, although strangers don’t wanna look at mah nails! quite like you’d expect.  What, with being normal and all that.

Another shot of Sunshine, layered over Wish:

Last topper is Light Up the Shadows, layered over Dream:

This is just the cutest thing!  And it was super spread-y, which is nice for a topper with larger glitters.  Cuz I don’t feel like spending 18 years doing manual glitter placement, cuz that is EFFORT, and I don’t take kindly to that kind of thing.  I mean, if there’s effort to be done, it better involve mashed potatoes at the very least.  

OMG, what?  Shut up, brain.

Light Up the Shadows is a clear base with various sizes of matte black and white glitter and opalescent glitter.  Some of the glitters in here appeared blue which is why I paired it up with this polish.  But it was just a weird lighting situation.  Or a science experiment in progress.  

Another look using It’s All Rainbows & Unicorns, this time layered over Believe:

The round up:

The Light & Bright collection released just a few hours ago, so who’s having the best day ever now?  (You, to be clear.)  And if you’re not properly convinced how much you need these (possibly due to no eyes or a black soul), here’s three things you might enjoy:

1. The crèmes glow in blacklight, which will come in handy for those with a more exciting life than me.

2. They watermarble, which naturally I have zero nail art to show you.  Best blogger ever, is what you’re thinking.

3. They stamp. Officially, all your dreams just came true.

Here’s the deets:

Individual bottles $7

The entire set of 10 polishes retails for $60

Set of 6 crèmes only is $38

Set of 4 toppers only is $26 – and for real, this is a great, must-have set of toppers

ALSO:  I have a discount!  Use code SOR10 for 10% off your order cuz you read all the way to the bottom.  Internet high fives for you!  (And kisses for the cute ones.)  Click here for shopping!

Later, loves!

Top Shelf Lacquer: Multichrome Madness Custom Quad

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Sounds I like:

1. The toilet shutting off after you’ve flushed.  Cuz after four years of just jiggling the handle, hubby has finally completed a DIY project.  I no longer have to inform guests of proper protocol of the sad state of affairs in our bathroom, or leave a note for the housekeeper that the toilet is even more broken than ever (due to failed DIY attempt #1).  NOPE.  All fixed.  Who’s a fancy lady now?  (ME, to be clear.)

2. Your cat’s purring up close after he accidentally mistakes your lap for something he loves.  This happened to me twice yesterday, and I posted a picture in yesterday’s blog as proof.  I’m not certain what he was doing cuddling up to me, but regardless, I am var var concerned about his brain.  He jumped off about 2.5 seconds later, cuz either he realized what he’d done or he sensed a hug was coming.  He no likee the hugs.

3. Silence.  Unless it’s after dark and I am alone.  Cuz that’s when the hauntings start.  I can sit in a house with no TV on, windows open and a nice breeze blowing through, joyously minding my own business.  But as soon as I hear a random noise from somewhere back there, well, basically it’s time to move.  I mean, I know there ain’t no one going in that laundry room for fun.  In other words:  GHOST.  There is no other logic for that one.

4. Bananas inside someone’s mouth. Oh wait, that’s just a punishment for bad people.  Cuz whatever kind of torture you’re into, listening to the smack of a banana being mooshed around with a tongue is enough to make me confess to anything.  That is not a typo.  Blech.

Now that I’ve grossed everyone out good and proper, it’s time for nail polish.  I have some of the most beautiful things you’ll ever see on the blog today.  Ready to hand over your wallet and look suuuuuuper unattractive in the process?  Get your smelling salts handy, then, and take a look at these: 

Told ya.  I hope you’ve locked yourself in a room in case of accidental divorce cuz there’s only so much sexy to go around while holding a drool bucket.  It’s best to keep that private just in case.

This is the Multichrome Madness group custom quad made special for the members of the Multichrome Madness Facebook group.  One of my favorite brands, Top Shelf Lacquer, is in the spotlight for April, and Amy has seriously blown me away with what she came up with.  Seriously, NAILED IT doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.  You like holo and glitter and shifty little dreamboats?  Well, today is your lucky day.

First up is Tequila Mockingbird:

Do you hear angels? I hear angels.  How stinkin gorgeous is this?  (Very.)

This one is a blue to purple shifter with the most delicious square holo microglitters.  As a person with a touch of the OCD, squares soothe my soul like nothing else.  Cuz how you gonna line up round things all snug and Tetris-style?  As an expert organizer, I can tell you it’s nigh on impossible.  Even as a child, I knew.  I mean, I couldn’t kick a soccer ball to save my life, but if you needed your cart of groceries organized, I was a dadgum champion.  So, basically same thing, is what I mean.

Under the lamps, the purple comes out much better:

Macros of all the goodies:

Did you just die?  Cuz I sure did.

Next is Help Me Straighten Mai Tai:

In case you were unaware, Top Shelf Lacquers names their polishes after drinks and drink-related things.  It’s all very clever.  The polishes in this quad were named and voted on by members of the Multichrome Madness group, and lemme just say there are some smarty pants in that group.  Not me though cuz my brain was like WINE COOLER! and then had itself a little seat in the back.  Apparently sipping on one drink for three hours straight doesn’t bode well for the expertise.  Plus, I need 18 hours minimum to come up with genius things.  That is why blogging is hard.

So this one is a purple to red to bronze shifter with those same square holo microglitters.  You should see the situation in this room right now.  Ugly ecstasy face sounds about right.  Blah.

Under the lamps, it’s a much more brighter purple:

A square glitter EXTRAVAGANZA!:

Mercy, that’s pretty.

Here’s Schnapp To It:

Oh my goodness, will the drooling ever end?

NO.

This one is a super shifter that goes from green to blue to purple with the occasional flash of red. More glitters too cuz there’s literally no end to this.  All the glitters, all over my body.  Or just on my nails cuz SOCIETY with their judgy eyes.

I think this one is my favorite.  The colors in it are fabulous, and the shift on it is unreal.  The green, it got me.  It got me good, guys.

Under the lamps, purple says hi:

Now for macros:


I won’t lie; I kinda want to lick that one.  Cuz I’d be surprised if it didn’t taste just like a Jolly Rancher.  I mean, it’s probably more poison-y than expected, but who’s to know for sure?  Being normal is zero fun sometimes.  

Lastly, here’s Now Watch Me Sip…My Chardon-Nay Nay:

This one is another super shifter that goes between pink, orange, gold and green with more square holo microglitters.  Seriously, words have left me.  It’s moan-y throat noises from here on out and I have no idea how the rest of this blog is getting done.

Uhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnn.  See?  Ugh.

Aside from all that though, it’s probably one of the best named polishes of all time.  You’re buying it for that reason.  But also cuz it’s pretty.

Under the lamps, the pink tone has its jazz hands on:

You’re about to spend some money, I can already tell.

The round up:

This quad is available now, but you gotta be a member of the Multichrome Madness Facebook fan group to get it.  Here’s your to-do list:

Click here to join the group, then head over to the Top Shelf Lacquer store and throw every last one of these in your cart.  Click here to shop.  DO IT.  I mean it.

Single bottles retail for $12 for full size or $8.50 for 8ml polish shots

Full set of 4 costs $46 for full size or $32 for polish shots

The quad is only available until April 30, so if you immediately thought POLISH EMERGENCY, you are correct.

While you’re in the clicking mood, join the Top Shelf Lacquer Facebook fan group as well.  Stay up to date on sales, specials, group customs, sneak peeks and general coolness.  Click here please, then toot your own horn cuz you make good decisions.

Also, check out all the Instagrams!  Top Shelf Lacquer can be found here, Multichrome Madness can be found here, your favorite blogger in all the land can be found here.

In addition, this set is available in two alternative finishes – a straight multichrome or a holo version.  These are not part of the group custom but will be available on the website if you’re not a fan a glitter.  Although WHY AREN’T YOU?! is the actual question. 

Welp, you’ve made it to the end so high fives for you then.  I know sometimes my blog posts are wordy and ridiculous, and make zero sense most of the time.  So I appreciate that you’ve taken time out of your day to come say hi and die over nail polish with me.  You’re the best and I lub you lots.

Later, loves!

Nailed It!: Sprung Into Spring Collection 

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Hubby left to go play golf and now I’m just sitting here wondering if I’m expected to make my own dinner or what?  Cuz it’s been at least six years since I’ve cooked anything, and I’m certain if it’s not a cup of instant mac ‘n cheese, things will not turn out well.  Or it’ll take nine years to chop up a garlic clove, and honestly, I just don’t have much commitment in me.  I sit down for a living; if I’m moving around at all, it’s cuz someone put a Starbucks in the other room or something.

I suppose it’s all my fault about the golfing.  I encouraged it.  I mean, hubby bought golf clubs during a “just in case” kind of moment, so when the opportunity came, I practically shooed him out the door.  I said all sorts of supportive wifely things, such as have fun, be good, and do you need an instruction manual?  Cuz I’ve known him since 2011 and golf has happened approximately zero plus never divided by what is golf, exactly?  In other words, there’s a comedy show down at the golf course if y’all’s not busy.

So while we wait for food to magically appear, I’ve got more pretty spring things to share!  I received the new Nailed It! Sprung Into Spring collection, and they are beauties!  Plus an opportunity for a glitter topper that justifies spending all your money.  You excited?  Well, you should be.  Take a look:

All your favorite Easter colors all lined up so nice.  Each with subtle sparkly, flakie-y effects.  You want them all, just so you know.    Cuz you’re the best crazy nail lady there ever was.

First up is Lovely Lilac:

This one is a lilac creme with a delicate dose of purple and blue flakies.  Tiny touch of holo to make it special-er.  Also, two quick coats cuz you have busy lives to tend to.  Not everyone lays on couches like me.

Close up of the goodies:

Dreamy!  You purple lovers just died a little.

Next up is Spring Fling:

This one is a soft pink creme with golden flakies and touch of holo.  It was hard to capture the sparkle cuz it was honestly pretty subtle.  In person, though, you can see it much better.  Now I did three coats here since pink is much lighter, but also I was swatching while sleeping cuz naps happen all by themselves whether I like it or not.  I kinda failed at this one, is what I’m saying.

Lolling tongue alert!

It really is a pretty color.  Darker than pastel, which makes my see-thru skin look sooooo much less unattractive.

Now here’s Blue Skies Ahead:

This one is my favorite, I think! I’m loving this bright baby blue creme.  Add in a touch of purple sparks and bit of holo shimmer, and can someone please help me hold my mouth closed?  Cuz my brain has stopped working.

Another macro in case you wanna pass out for a second:

This one was a smoooooooth two coater.  It’s lovely.  If you’re buying just one – although LOGIC, STRAIGHT OUT THE WINDOW – then I recommend this one first.

Well, no more blogging I guess:

Seriously, who’s cat is this?  Cuz mine wouldn’t dare, not even when I’m covered in Popeye’s chicken crumbs, which happens more than you think.  Although perhaps he’s trying to kill me, which in that case, makes 100% more sense.  Cuz CLAWS.  Ouchie.

Lastly, here’s Poppin’ Periwinkle:

This one is a pastel periwinkle blurple-y shade with pink, purple and blue flakies and more of that holographic sparkle.  So stinkin’ pretty.  If you love purple, then this one is calling your name.  Most likely in a French accent and handing you a Starbucks cuz what could be more perfect than that scenario?  Besides, Leonardo in your living room with a basketful of kittens that is.

Let’s seal the deal:

Do you hear angels?  I hear angels.

And in case you’re still not convinced properly, here’s one more thing:

The cutest glitter topper you ever did see!  It’s called Bloom and it’s full of different sized glitters in varying shades of purple and aqua and I’m thinking there’s silver in there too.  Here, I’ve layered it over Poppin’ Periwinkle and it looks dang fabulous.  You a fancy lady now!

An insane display of pretty:

You’re about 2 seconds away from sticking your fingers in people’s faces.   Look at mah nails!  Surprisingly, society isn’t as interested as one might think.  SOCIETY is zero fun sometimes.

Some nail art I did:

Get a good look at these, cuz this is literally as good as it gets.  I used the layered floral image from Uber Chic Beauty 15-02 plate right on top of Lovely Lilac, and I think it turned out so cute.  High fives were everywhere, which is the only logical reaction to a brief moment of mojo.  Then the Universe said SIMMER DOWN CRAZY, and bad things started to happen.

So, do NOT look at this one:

I said don’t look!  Ugh.  

I used the Uber Chic Beauty Yay Spring plate on top of Blue Skies Ahead on the middle finger, then I attempted some dry marble decals for my other fingers.  NOPE doesn’t even begin to describe this scenario.

OMG, mojo has done took a vacay.  Keep scrolling.

I used the Uber Chic Beauty Yay Spring plate again, this time over Spring Fling, and I’m thinking someone needs to take the stamping plates away.

Okay, I kinda like this one:

Actually, I really like it.  The most simplest one of them all; go figure.

I used the Lina Make Your Mark 03 plate with Poppin’ Periwinkle and the Bloom glitter on top.  Recreations are in order, yes?  YES.

The round up:

The Sprung Into Spring collection released a couple days ago so you’re all set for shopping!  Here’s the deets:

Entire 4-piece collection is $30

Single bottles $8.50 (if you must)

And remember, the first 10 people to order gets a free Bloom glitter topper, so go right now. POLISH EMERGENCY! At the minimum.
Also, in case you weren’t already having the best day ever, use code dianna15 and get 15% off your order.  That is your reward for reading all the way to the bottom.

Click here for shopping!  And if you have a horn handy, give yourself a little toot.  Cuz you make good decisions, that’s why.

Later, loves!