Monthly Archives: June 2014

Glossybox | June 2014

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Last day of the month. Two reviews to go. One box isn’t even here yet. I have failed.

In better news, only a 4 day work week this week! I love holidays. And to commemorate the occasion, here is a patriotic themed Glossybox:

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The most adorable packaging that ever lived. I’m keeping the box. I don’t know what for, but I feel like I could be arrested for treason if I throw it away. I would not fare well in an orange jumpsuit. I have pink undertones.

First item is the Rusk Texture Dry Finishing Spray. It has been immediately regifted. I don’t have time in the morning to do anything to my hair that requires a texture spray.  I almost don’t have time to do anything, much less fiddle around with a hairdo that will most likely not last half an hour.   I mean, the best effort I’ve ever made towards any kind of hair style is purchasing a hair donut.  And that was done primarily because it’s fun to say hair donut.

Next item is of course a big fat poo.  It’s red and blue nail polish from StrangeBeautiful.  This has also been regifted.  The contents of this box is dwindling fast people!  Is there anything left in here for me?  (Sad face.)  Now, to clarify, I’m not saying anything is wrong with the red and blue nail polish.  I just don’t want it.  It is not my preference.  Despite the fact it’s completely in season and holiday appropriate. I swear though, it’s found a loving home with my daughter. She will draw the Stars and Stripes for America, don’t worry.

Okay now things are starting to get better. I got a body butter by Ayres. The scent is called Patagonia, which I assume means jasmine and rosemary cuz that’s what it says on the label. I’m not a fan of those fake scents, those scent names that are not a real thing, but it doesn’t stink that much. It doesn’t smell like paradise either so don’t get too excited. However, it sinks in very fast which is my number one prerequisite for a body butter. I would actually consider buying a full size of this. Maybe try a different scent, as Midnight Tango or Pampas Sunrise seems like they would smell better. But what do I know? Cuz those aren’t real things either.

Got an eyeshadow crayon from Sumita Beauty in the color Champagne. Here’s my face: -__-

I dunno. I guess it’s not that bad, but I don’t prefer cream eyeshadows. I just don’t really know what to do with them. However, I used it this weekend and it was pretty creamy, went on very smooth, and the color was nice. Then I put it away in my Train Case of Forgotten Makeup where it will live for all eternity. I’ll dig it out every now and then, but there will be no miracles.

Last item is my absolute fave of them all. It’s a glorious hand cream by Camille Beckman called Imperial Repair. I love it. For one, it squeezes itself out of the tube very elegantly. I cannot explain it any other way than that. In fact, it squeezes out so incredibly elegantly, I would do nothing but squeeze it out for the rest of my life as a side job or a hobby. There’s just a satisfying pleasure in it. Oh my gawd, what’s happened to me?

The smell is a lemongrass grapefruit which sounds heavenly and is also a real thing. However, the lemon overwhelms the grapefruit so it smells mostly about 100% like furniture polish. But it also moisturizes well and leaves the hands feeling soft and lovely. Approved! Put it on your shopping list.

Thanks for spending the last day of June with me. One more box arrives tomorrow, then I got empties, July boxes and some hauls to share. The fun never ends!

Petit Vour | June 2014

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Man it’s humid outside. But I will let you know I’m sitting on my shaded back patio as we speak drinking a Bartles & James and writing this post cuz I take care of my people.

And what that has to do with anything other than getting tipsy on a Sunday night, I have no idea.

And by tipsy, I just mean having ONE wine cooler because I am a professional drinker and I get things done.

Just kidding. But I am sitting outside trying to enjoy the cool breeze and last few moments of the weekend. And I am having a Bartles & James. And I am verrrry tipsy.

In other words, not kidding about any of it. Lawd, what am I going on about? Dunno. Moving on.

Petit Vour came in!

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This is one of my favorite subscriptions boxes. I’m usually in love or super duper in like with the majority of the items in the boxes. This month is another great one.

First product is the Brightening Youth Serum from Mun. I love my serums, as you may already know. This one, however, stumped me a little. It says ‘serum’ but it’s made from a blend of oils. Usually oils are the last step after moisturizer since water-based moisturizers can’t penetrate oil barriers. (Science!) And serums are applied prior to moisturizers. Oh my gawd, my brain hurts.

As a Virgo and a hypochondriac, I need clear, concise instruction and can’t find any anywhere. What is wrong with people? Would it kill someone to put some specifics on a website somewhere? Otherwise, I may apply my products all out of order and my face might fall off. So I’ve emailed the company for further explanation. As you knew I would.

Got another cleanser for the stash. This makes my 6th in line for use I think. Luckily, they’re pretty small samples so hopefully it won’t take long to get to it. And if you’re curious (you are), it’s the TAY Rosehip Balancing Cleanser. And it’s in the most adorable little bamboo type container. I wish I could give a further review on it now, but unfortunately I only have one face and can’t get through cleansers any faster than a normal person. It’ll be in my July empties post, so hang tight.

Got a shampoo and conditioner set by Evolvh. And this time they are equally-sized bottles so I can use them both at the same time until they’re empty. This makes me undeniably happy. There’s no sense in giving me a shampoo and no conditioner, or a shampoo with a little one-time-use conditioner packet. Because what am I supposed to do with the leftover shampoo then? I mean, why do you stress me out so unnecessarily?

I used both products on my hair this evening, and I liked them. The smell was very nice, which is a plus. The shampoo is clear which works best for my very fine hair. Colored, pearly shampoos tend to be to weighing on me. Does that happen to anyone else? My hair stylist told me it’s a thing. Apparently clear shampoos clarify hair better than the other kinds. At least on me anyway. As for the conditioner, it’s not super thick so it didn’t cling to my hair and I was kind of worried. But when I rinsed it out, I could feel he softness of my hair under the water.

On a side note, upon reading the directions online, I realized I washed my hair wrong. It says to let the shampoo sit for 1-2 minutes for shine and volume boost. Well, in my defense, when is the last time you needed to read directions on a shampoo bottle? Drat.

Last product is not even worth mentioning cuz I’m so bored by it, I may fall asleep. But because I love you all, and I am a professional, I will tell you I got a baby blue nail polish from NCLA. It’s part of their Jetsetter collections, and I could care less. But I’ll keep it cuz I don’t have a baby blue polish.

Yes, I confuse even myself sometimes. I’m sure it’s a lovely product for those who are way into nail polish. And I will use it since I do polish my own nails. And I may even love it since sometimes I do. I promise I’ll let you know.

Okay that’s it for now. See y’all tomorrow with more fun stuffs and even more awkward endings. Bye!

Lip Factory | June 2014

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I just realized there are only 3 days left in this month, but I got 4 reviews left to do. Where has the time gone? I thought I was doing so good. I guess it’s time to stop smug-smiling and get down to business.

Lip Factory came. I got these things:

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It’s a pretty good box this month. I will use almost everything in here. That’s pretty rare. So I’ll save my booboo for the end. If you’ve been reading my blog, I’m pretty sure you know which one I do not love. If you haven’t been reading my blog, what have you been doing with your life? You got about 90 posts to catch up on. Get busy.

First thing I got was a ModelCo eyeliner in black. I’ve been using this all week and really enjoying it. It’s very black and goes on easy. No tugging or skipping, which makes me var var happy. Other than that, what else can I tell you about a black eyeliner? Not much. Moving on.

Another ModelCo product in the box – this time, a lipgloss. I got a rose color, and it’s kind of pretty. The formula did not feel sticky or anything. But is it the lipgloss of life? No. Even though it has a mirror right there on the tube. They tried at least. I suppose if you are ever in a conundrum whether to purchase a lipgloss or a mirror compact, this product right here will put an end to all that. Otherwise, you could probably never own this and still basically be able to continue with life.

Then I got a lip liner from 29 Cosmetics. I’m not a huge lip liner person. It’s very hard for me to draw a straight line, even though my lips are there for guidance. So instead of creating unnecessary anxiety for myself, I just skip the thing altogether. However, for those who do enjoy a good lip liner this one works pretty decent. It also has grape seed extract in it to protect your lips from environmental pollutants. Does that matter to you? If so, you’re welcome and I’m getting back in pajamas now.

Favorite thing in the box is the green eyeshadow from Girlactik. It’s a beautiful green with a flattering pearly finish. I would own more of these if each shadow didn’t cost $19. I mean I like them and all, but not $19 worth of love. I’ll just take this green one and manage … somehow. Plus, with as many palettes I currently have stashed under my bathroom sink, I will own this little single for at least 15 years.

Another goodie is the lip serum from Befine. This serum claims to firm and plump, smooth and soften. It has peptides in it for you rocket scientists who know what that means. The consistency is like an oil, but it doesn’t feel oily. It’s slick and shiny. I’ve been putting it on in the morning at the start of my routine, but I’m thinking I’ll carry this around with me all day. It feels nice on the lips, and who doesn’t love that? (Crazy people.)

Now for the booboo. The Palladio nail sunscreen. I’m not against the idea of this product. It really is just a clear top coat that has UV protection in it. But did I want this? No. It’s still nail polish, and nail polish bores me. However, since I don’t actually own a top coat I will keep it.

Apparently the sun will fade out your nail polish color. I’m not sure how long you gotta be out in the sun in order for fading to take place, but I’m pretty sure I’ll never have this problem. I don’t go outside on purpose. I mean, yes I go outside but those are all “have-to” situations, i.e., work, runs to Sephora, Starbucks. You know, the necessities in life. But I will never voluntarily go camping, or to a public swimming pool. Probably not even a family reunion if they’re doing it outside. Serious, if you see me doing those things, you should assume I’ve been kidnapped and call police immediately.

What I’m trying to say is I don’t need nail sunscreen.

Okay, done for the day. It’s lunchtime and I need food. And then Sephora emailed me a VIB Rouge exclusive offer, so I need to do some shopping as well. Var var busy day ahead of me, as you can see.

Bye!

Buying Stuff: Episode 16

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I spent two hours at the Chuck E. Cheese with a 3-year-old and a 1-year-old so everything listed below is immediately justified. Don’t even try to argue with that.

Here’s my stuffs:

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Finally got a chance to exchange the MAC Pro Longwear Foundation. A few months ago, I assumed incorrectly that I was an NW25. I wore this shade to work fully aware I had a slight line is demarcation on my jaw. Luckily I have sweet friends who lie to me and tell me it’s not that noticeable. Otherwise, I would’ve had to go home sick.

Anyway, tried the NW20 shade and it’s perfect. I really like the finish of this foundation. It looked very natural on me. I felt if I didn’t have a splotchy natural complexion, I would have looked flawless. Because this one came pretty close. Unfortunately I’m paying for my reckless youth. Not wearing sunscreen and picking at your face is bad bad bad, kids. If you ignore everything written in my blog, at least remember this one.

Well. Good deed = done. I have succeeded at life. I can get back in pajamas now.

I was in the makeup section at Dillard’s minding my own business, when the Dior counter started calling my name. And when Dior speaks, you listen. I didn’t even have an idea what I wanted; I was just “looking”. Except that’s not a real thing. Y’all know “just looking” is a made up term wives tell their husbands. Just looking is code for I’m about to buy a ton of shit; don’t judge me.

I was browsing the Fluid Stick lipgloss. The lady at the counter was swatching them for me, and I’m searching everywhere for a price tag. I know these things aren’t free, dammit; where do they keep the price tag? Hidden, that’s where. Or else you’d probably never buy this.

But lawd knows I ain’t asking. Not gonna find out ahead of time it’s $35 and then embarrass myself by not buying it. So I do, and it gets handed to me in a cute little logoed bag, which I parade around for all the eyes to see. I mean, if you’re gonna spend $35 on lipgloss, you might as well get some congratulatory stares out of it. I’m pretty sure that’s what those stares were for. Certainly not pity ones for the weirdo holding a Dior bag in your face.

And for those curious, the color I got was #869 Vie D’enfer, a brownish reddish thing. And it has a really lovely glossy shine. Worth the price tag though? Mmmmm, probably not. I don’t always make the best decisions while in the midst of a makeup seduction. I lose control of my brain.

Another lipgloss I didn’t really want or need was the Napoleon Perdis Luminous Lip Veil in the color Scarlet Fever. It is not my fault it was 50% off, and it was on my way out the door. Don’t put that stuff right in front of my eyeballs. Bad things happen.

However. It’s a beautiful red orange gold sparkly gloss that catches the light better than anything I own. I’m really happy I bought it. See, sometimes random purchases work out. I’m a smart person after all.

Last item in the pic is the Chanel le Volume de Chanel mascara. I had heard someone on YouTube say this is the mascara of life, so where’s the question? I walked up to the counter, and the salesgirl barely got her May I Help You out when I grabbed the mascara and handed it to her. I’m sure she was impressed by my determination. Now if only I could apply that to all areas, I’d be the President of the United States. At the very least.

The mascara is a very nice one. The texture is slightly thicker than a normal mascara, so it could get gloopy if you don’t take your time. But it does a great job for me in lengthening and fanning my lashes. Perhaps not the mascara of life, but a must have regardless.

And then Sephora happened. Oopsie:

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At least it’s only this one thing this time. Saw this cute little skincare set from L’Occitane and knew I had to have it. I was not seduced by the royal blue packaging in any way whatsoever. Packaging doesn’t work on me.

Okay, that’s not a thing either. If you are adorable, I want you. If you look like you came from the Dollar Tree, you may have a seat.

This is their anti-aging Imortelle set, and I have no idea what that means, but each item is called Precious, and well, that’s me in a nutshell.

So you get the Precious Cleansing Foam, Precious Eye Balm, Precious Water and Precious Cream. That’s a lot of Precious in one place! I’m excited to use it. The reviews online are mostly positive (over 4 out of 5 stars), except several were saying the moisturizer had a funny smell. Now, I’ve applied salmon egg enzyme on my face for over a month, and am currently using a day cream made out of shiitake mushrooms – certainly I can handle a cream that just smells “funny”? We will see. I’ll be ready to use this set in about 15 years or so.

Stockpiling skincare backfires sometimes. Although if I ever find myself living on a deserted island somewhere, I’m already prepared. Succeeding at life once again. Seriously, why am I still wearing business casual when pajamas are all I need?

Payday is one day where I can honestly say I make the BEST decisions:

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Your eyes are not deceiving you. This is the Burberry Complete Eye Palette in Sage Green. And it’s stunning. I love green, so naturally I have gravitated towards this one. It’s just a color that has the potential to emote feelings of spring AND fall. I have to have lots of green in my life.

As for the eyeshadows themselves, these go on very soft in terms of pigmentation. Even the darkest brown shade isn’t that dark. So it’s hard to have a super defined eye look unless you rim it with a heavy black winged liner or something. There isn’t much shimmer, so that’s good for me, but the colors just don’t POP enough. However, I will use it often, especially when fall rolls around, cuz I think the whole scheme is lovely. Cuz even when green is bad, it’s still pretty good. I love green. Did I tell you that?

Alrighty franz, I’m out of time for now. Back tomorrow with the best post that ever lived.

Birchbox | June 2014

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For any of you who assumed I never did anything else besides work and go to Sephora, lemme just say you are 97.83748% correct. But every once in awhile I do venture out and celebrate birthday parties with friends. I did party makeup. Here’s proof:

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Yes my hair is in a Turbie Twist. I couldn’t be bothered to take a selfie after I was completely ready. That would be nonsense. No, it’s much more practical to show the world this picture instead.

For those who need to know things, it’s Makeup Geek eyeshadows on eyes and Bite Beauty lipstick in Violet on lips. It took me 2 hours. I manage my time very well, as you can clearly see.

And now for the best segue that ever lived, here’s my Birchbox goodies:

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This box has it’s highs and lows. Let’s start with the highs so we can end on a low note and then your day can only get better from there. (I take care of my people.)

Got a little sampler of the Coastal Scents Revealed 2 palette. While I’m always up for receiving eyeshadows, I’m kind of ho hum pigs bum about a batch of brown eyeshadows. But I did use them and they were nice and the look I got was natural and pretty. If you go to my Ipsy review from this month, you can see me wearing it. I’d link it for you, but you are aware I went out last night aren’t you? Yes, var var tired today. Effort = not given.

I love skincare. Like in an unhealthy way probably. You could do a full on shopping excursion under my bathroom sink. But not only that but I’m starting to collect things on the rim of my bathtub as well. Added this Evologie Stay Clear cleanser to the mix. As soon as I finish the four cleansers I already have lined up, I’m all over this one. So in about three months probably. Get excited!

Received a little trio of Davine’s hair stuff. Got a bottle of the Love Smoothing Shampoo, which is perfect for my harsh, frizzy, undisciplined hair (their description, not mine). And then I got a one time use packet of the matching conditioner. Which makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. What am I supposed to do with the leftover shampoo in the bottle now that I don’t have the accompanying conditioner to go with it? Go to Birchbox.com and purchase more conditioner? Oh, I get it. Very sneaky, Birchbox.

I will say that I probably will go buy this. Using the two together did wonders for my hair. Either that or I psychologically brought it into being. Which I’m pretty sure happens the majority of the time anyway. Otherwise why would I be continuing to use a facial exfoliator that literally smells like a fish hatchery happened upon my face?

The conditioner is very thick, but when your hair has a mind of it’s own, you need to suffocate the hell out of it. Behave! And it did.

The other thing they gave me is the OI/All In One Milk. It’s a leave in conditioning treatment kind of thingy that has a variety of talents like controls frizz, protects from heat, detangles, adds shine, etc. I used it with enthusiasm, then quickly let it go. One time use packets are not meant for full time commitment. They are the boyfriends of my youth.

We’re headed downhill now. Last two things are big fat boos. But lemme just iterate they are boos for me but maybe not for you. Cuz I don’t prefer the genre. The products themselves are probably very lovely.

First one is a nail polish by Color Club in the color Gold Struck. What can I say about this in order to make you want to buy it? Ummmmm, I kept it so … That’s a pretty big deal right there.

Last item in the box is English Laundry perfume. If I enjoyed wearing perfume I would wear this. It does not stink. For those who need a better description than that, it smells like quince, white chocolate and jasmine. And I can kind of detect the chocolate if I close my eyes and think real hard. But I’m probably imagining that up cause it’s lunch time and I really want a Snickers bar.

And to really bring home the low note, I went to Birchbox thinking I was going to purchase the Davine’s shampoo and conditioner, then saw it would cost me over $50 so I ran far far away.

Enjoy the rest of your Sunday!

Sample Society | June 2014

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So you know how my Love Lula subscription ran out last month and I opted not to renew?  Well, I’ve replaced it as you probably knew I would.  I am now the proud owner of a month-to-month subscription to Memebox.  What is Memebox?  It’s a box full of Korean skincare and beauty samples.  Why do I need this?  Why is the sky blue?  Don’t ask stupid questions.

The below is not my Memebox.  It’s Sample Society:

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Although heavy on the skincare, like literally the entire box, I think this one is pretty good (other than that blasted perfume sample that is). I’ve used several of the items and I have opinions to bestow, so let’s get started.

First things first, the Orlane Hydro Matifying Care tube is so teeny tiny, they killed a thousand trees for that insanely big packaging.  Serious, I was like oooh, Orlane!, thinking of the many many days ahead of me wearing this luxury moisturizer.  And then upon opening the box, I mentally checked off about 19 days.  Drat.  However, this is a very nice moisturizer.  It looks thick when you squeeze it out, but it goes on so light and lovely.  It’s supposed to be mattifying, and I guess it kind of is, but my pores can be seen from outer space so you gotta do something a lot more industrial than apply moisturizer to cover those babies up.

That was a huge run on sentence but I am too tired to figure out how to explain it grammatically correctly.  Also, I’m not sure I just said proper English.  This post is going tragically downhill.

Speaking of teeny tiny samples, the Karin Herzog Vita-A-Kombi 2 moisturizer yielded two whole days.  Probably worked out for the best because there seemed to be a lot of specific instructions involved in the use of this product.  Allow me to explain:

Nowhere on this tube told me what this stuff was.  Could be a serum, or a mask. Possibly moisturizer.  As a person with OCD issues, I need clear, concise instruction on virtually everything I don’t understand.  Do not tell me to cook fish until it flakes easily with a fork because how long is that exactly?  Flakes easily isn’t even a proper cooking term, and if so it should come with a standard length of time it takes to do so, like 15 minutes or something.  And if you mean to cook it 15 minutes, just say 15 minutes.  Why ya gotta go make up cooking words instead?

I’ve went off topic.  Well, you can’t expect me to cook a decent salmon with that sort of attention span, now can you?

But back to the Karin Herzog thingy.  I contacted the company, and turns out this is a moisturizer made with 2% oxygen, retinol and vitamin E.  I was also informed I cannot use my fingers to apply this as they will most likely burn and rot away.  Well, that’s not what they said specifically, but that’s what I heard.  What they probably said was to apply it with a brush as the benefits of the oxygen will absorb through your fingers and never get to your face.  Sounds much less dangerous, but I swear I was scared for like 15 seconds.

I did as I was told and got out a little concealer brush, used it, and everything turned out fine.  Nothing exploded or melted, which is all good news.  I even went so far as to purchase a better brush at Walmart yesterday so I could apply my second time like a true professional (after watching the Karin Herzog YouTube channel demonstration – which is something only an idiot like me would do).  Turns out the tube had two uses in it so I overreacted just slightly.  Thank goodness the brush only cost $1. And even if the oxygen had absorbed through my fingers instead of my face, two days worth of oxygen wouldn’t have made a lick of difference anyway.  Two-time-use tubes are almost just as bad as one-time-use packets.  What. Is. The. Point.

Next item is a repeat.  In fact, it’s such a massive repeat, I could have stocked a warehouse with it.  Got my FIFTH tube of Pur-Lisse Hydra Balance moisturizer.  And what can I say about this product that I haven’t already mentioned before at least four other times in this blog?  A whole bunch of nothing.  I mean, I’m currently using one of my older tubes and it works fine.  Goes on smooth, sinks in pretty good.  Doesn’t leave me sticky.  I just don’t love it enough to continue hoarding it like a hoarding hoarder.  Regifted.

Another product that leaves me guessing is this H2O+ Oxygenating Rejuvenator.  Even the title doesn’t give a hint. My OCD can’t take this. So I’ve emailed customer service and am waiting impatiently for an answer. I am assuming it’s a moisturizer, and if so, would it have killed someone to print the word ‘moisturizer’ right there on the tube? Why do you insist on driving me insane?

I’ve been kind of getting into dry oil sprays lately. So getting this Borghese Fango Deep Hydration Finishing Treatment (var var long explanation for spray oil) was fine by me. I have been using it for the past few nights, and although I don’t have much to compare it to yet, I will say that I like it okay. It absorbs nicely, which is probably the most important aspect of an oil mist. However, it smells like men’s cologne. Not fruit, not flowers, not even some fake made up ocean breeze slash desert oasis smell, which I probably would have actually preferred for once. Nope, this is straight up men’s cologne. And not even a very good cologne. So I will not repurchase after the sample runs out. I do not want to smell like my ex-boyfriend from high school.

Last product in the box has been saved for last cuz I knew if I started with it you’d fall right to sleep. It’s a perfume by Juliette Has a Gun called Anyway. And I’m not even gonna pretend I sniffed it, even for research purposes. It’s sitting in my mom’s little care package I’m making for her out of my beauty box rejects. Awwwww, can you say best daughter ever?

It’s always awkward ending review posts like this cuz the nerd in me feels like I need to sum it all up in a concluding paragraph. But the lazy in me always comes out on top. And so I’m just saying bye and I’ll see you tomorrow.

Ipsy | June 2014

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Another day, another box.  Artfully displayed for your viewing pleasure.  I’m sure I irritate the crap out of my Instagram friends who do not enjoy seeing this sort of thing.  These friends shall furthermore be referred to as Crazy People.  That way we’re all clear on who we are supposed to love the best.

Here’s Ipsy:

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First of all, there’s a filter on this photo. I was taking the picture in damn near darkness, as my husband likes to watch his tv from a cavern-like atmosphere. So I had to tweak the settings so you could see the products more clear. I could have just gone into another room and turned the light on, but that required effort that I didn’t have to give.

But most importantly, the reason we’re all here: The box. It’s a pretty good one despite the fact I’m only keeping two products. But don’t worry; I’m fine with that. Let’s get started!

I love NYX Butter Gloss. This stuff is wonderful. I own maybe 6, possibly 7 different colors. So imagine my absolute annoyance that out of approximately 20 shades available I get sent the one I already own. Why does life hate me? Pffft. Turns out Ipsy only had three shades on hand, and I owned two out of the three. Odds were against me from the beginning. But still. This product probably shouldn’t be included in a box because the entire world has a NYX Butter Gloss in their back pocket and chances are it’s in these exact same colors.

I’m whining. I’ve missed my own point. Blah.

However, these NYX Butter Glosses are amazing. They have a super soft texture, smells like you could eat it, and feels very moisturizing and non-sticky on the lips. If you don’t own one, you’ve most likely been living in the cavern-like atmosphere with my husband, and you should probably run right out and buy a couple. It’s one purchase I can practically guarantee you’ll be happy about. Finish this blog post first though, then you may go.

Next is this Be A Bombshell Lash Out mascara. As I’ve mentioned before, I love mascara. That and eyeshadow are the two things I can’t get enough of. So receiving this was actually one of the best things about the box. I wore it on Saturday, and it wasn’t bad at all. Didn’t feel like it was amazing or a must-have product or anything, but it did alright. However, the smell of it was so gross. Smelled like straight up chemicals. Apparently everyone on Ipsy is talking about the smell, so it’s not just my tube. However, I’m not sure if the smell is natural or if all us subscribers got some expired product. I’m debating whether to keep it or not. You don’t smell it when it’s on your lashes, but if it’s spoiled I don’t want it anywhere on my body, least of all eyes.

Then I got this lovely jade green shimmer eyeliner by NickaK. This stuff is glorious. Vibrant, sparkly (but not outrageous), and surprise, surprise!, I don’t own a liner in this color. Truly is a miracle straight from the Baby Jesus. Anyway.  The brush applicator is rather stiff, but I actually found this to be helpful when applying.  I could practically lay the brush against my lashline and it would transfer color, which was awesome.  Because lawd knows how awful I am at applying liquid liner.  It’s a fiasco to the nth degree almost 97.956736% of the time.  On the off chance my liner looks halfway decent, you can bet it took me at the minimum 15 hours.

Here is a picture of my eye wearing the eyeliner and mascara together:

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So as you can see, the mascara does not look hideous as I mentioned. And the eyeliner is a stunner.  Approved!  Put it on your shopping list. (Well, not the mascara.  Jury’s still out.)

Got a repeat item in the form of DermaDoctor DD Cream.  Back when I was just starting to get interested in makeup, I got suckered into buying the full size of this DD cream by the saleslady at Ulta.  I say suckered in because I really didn’t understand what I was buying.  All I knew was that I was white and she was African-American and we could both use the same color-adjusting tube of DermaDoctor.  I got a little excited.  Foundation matching stresses me out.  Anyway.

Unfortunately, there is shimmer in it a little bit.  And my skin is too old for that nonsense.  So I used it, and it was fine, except for the shimmer.  I finally just gave it away, and I’ve never regretted it once.  But now this little tube has come back to haunt me.  If I went out more often, like clubbing or something, I’d just keep the dang sample and be done with it.  Because that’s the only place I can afford my face to be sparkling like diamonds – in near darkness.

Well in that case I could also wear it while watching tv with my husband in his cavern-like atmosphere.  Alright then.

Last item in the box is the biggest poo of all.  The product may be fabulous – Marc Anthony Dream Waves Beach Spray – but I do not use stuff like this.  If I wanted to make my hair lumpy – which is what my hair does to the style otherwise known as wavy – then I’d just wash my hair and let it air dry.  Save me all the trouble of using a spray.  Unfortunately, I do not look good with lumpy hair so am forced to flat iron it within an inch of its life.  These are just my struggles.  Others who do not share my struggles are probably spritzing their hair with this beach spray and laugh laugh laughing away.

Well, enjoy that.

That’s it for Ipsy.  Tune in again tomorrow for more fun stuff.